


The Other Fraser

by strawberry02



Category: Outlander & Related Fandoms, Outlander (TV), Outlander (TV) RPF, Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:07:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 50,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27853082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strawberry02/pseuds/strawberry02
Summary: On November 23, 1948 two little red headed girls were born.  One with bright fiery red hair who had a fiery red personality to match.  She was named Brianna after her grandfather Brian (unknown to the young girl for many years to come).  The other had sweet dark auburn curls with an equally sweet temperament.  She was named Quinlee after great uncle Quentin.  When Quinlee was just eight years old she became very sick, so sick that it caused guillain barre disease, a disease that lead to her having permanent leg weakness.  The twins are as different as night and day but they had one thing in common - they needed one another more than they could ever put into words.***POV switches between characters but first and primary character is Quinlee***MORE UPDATES TO COME.  Still working on the chapters but you know school gets in the way sometimes.
Relationships: Brianna Randall Fraser MacKenzie/Roger MacKenzie Wakefield, Claire Beauchamp/Jamie Fraser, Original Female Character/Original Male Character
Comments: 27
Kudos: 52





	1. Chapter 1

“Mama, mama! Look at what I found!” I run towards my mother as fast as my legs can carry me to show her the arrowhead I found by the creek. I trip over a root sticking out of the ground and sprawl face first into the dirt. Mama rushes over when she hears my sobs and picks me up in her gentle arms. I cry into her chest hard. I hate when I trip. I don’t mean to. “I don’t want to wear these silly leg braces anymore!” I say through my sobs. 

Mama rocks me back and forth on her lap. Rubbing a soothing hand up and down my back. “Oh I know Quinlee, I know. They are cumbersome things. I am sorry but you must try to get used to them. Are you hurt anywhere?” She asks while pushing my auburn hair away from my face. 

“No…” I let out through my sniffles. 

“Claire! Quinlee! Where are you?” Papa yells from further down the creek. 

“Over here Frank! We had a bit of a tumble!” Mama calls out to him. 

Papa and Brianna come around the corner holding a basket full of fish they caught. He gives her a tight squeeze around the shoulder and looks down at my twin proudly before turning to us. “Everyone alright? Still getting used to the leg braces are we? You must be patient Quinlee, things will get easier with time.” 

“I don’t want to be patient!” I cry out petulantly. I want to be like Bri. I want to be able to walk in the slippery wet creek and fish. I want to be able to run without tripping. I don't want to have to wear leg braces for the rest of my life.

Papa heaves out a weary sigh. “Bri and I will gut and clean the fish. I assume you’ve got this under control?” He addresses mama. She gives him an agitated look but simply nods. 

Mama uses the back of her sleeve to wipe away my tears. “Shh, shh, shh. It’s alright. It will get better. I promise. Things will get better with time. They always do.”


	2. Chapter 2

TEN YEARS LATER

I feel nerves tingling up my spine as I stand in line waiting to receive my diploma, willing myself not to trip. On all of the days to make a fool of myself today would be it. One last embarrassing hurrah before leaving the hallowed halls of St Mary’s all girls catholic high school. 

“Mary Peterson.” The principal announces as Mary ascends the stage and shakes his hand receiving her diploma. I take in another deep breath. I know who comes next. “Brianna Randall.” He calls out. My twin sister walks up confidently, head held high, bright red hair cascading down her back. She takes her diploma from the principal and gives him a firm handshake. I hold my breath. “Quinlee Randall.” I let the breath out and walk towards the stage. Don’t trip, don’t trip, don’t trip. I repeat the mantra over and over again in my head. Moving one leg brace in front of the other. Steps purposeful and full of intent. I let out a sigh of relief and give the principal a broad smile as I take the diploma and shake his hand, noticeably less firm than Bri but then again I never did have her strength. My twin and I take our seats. Bri gives me a pleased self-satisfied smile. I nudge her playfully. We are both over the moon to finally be leaving high school and start a new chapter at Harvard. We turn around and wave wildly at mama and papa. The looks of pride in their eyes as they wave back at us is palpable. I have never had papa look at me that way before. I find myself relishing in the feeling. I wish he would always look upon me in such a way. That evening, for the first time in months, we all sat down together for dinner in celebration. For a moment, just a moment, it feels like we are an actual family again. 

A week later as I am working on a new dress, placing a pin along the seam, I hear the front door open. Mama must be home from the hospital. I make my way out of my bedroom and down the hall but pull to a sudden stop when I hear the tone of the conversation between my parents. As long as I can remember they have never gotten along well. Cold doesn’t even begin to cover it. They weren’t particularly good at hiding it although lord knows they tried. 

“What is it?” Mama asks a note of concern in her voice. 

“I’d uh, I’d like to take Brianna to England.” Papa says. I feel my heart clench at his words. I should have figured he wouldn’t invite me. Bri had told me he had been talking to her more about England recently and suspected we might be going on a graduation trip. I fiddle with the silver butterfly charm on the necklace mama gave me for my tenth birthday. 

“Oh...that sounds lovely. Why not bring Quinlee with you? How long were you planning on going for?” Mama asks in a tight voice. 

“Well...I’ve been offered a position at Cambridge. A good one.” Father admits. I stop fiddling with the charm around my neck.

“An offer? What about the hospital? What about my patients? Frank I - I can’t just leave Boston and move to England.” Mama questions him confused.

“I’m not asking you to leave. I’m asking for a divorce, Claire.” He tells her firmly. I feel my breath catch in my throat. What the hell did he just say? 

“A - a divorce?” Mama stutters out. I can hear the hurt and anger in her voice. I feel it too. 

“Yes.” He repeats himself firmly again. 

“Well, we talked about this years ago and you said…” 

Papa interrupts her. “No, I know - I know what I said. But Brianna’s older now.” 

“Does she know about this plan? Does Quinlee? Are you just going to leave your other daughter behind?” Mama questions him accusingly. 

“No, neither of them know. Quinlee’s welcome to join me but I think we both know who she’ll choose and who Brianna will choose.” 

“How dare you.” Mama hisses at him in a trembling tone. 

“Claire please. There are fine universities out there for Bri. Oxford for one, where I still have some pull.” Papa says as if it’s already set in stone. 

“And what about Candy hmm?” Mama yells at him. 

“You mean Sandy? We’ll be getting married as soon as I’m free.” Papa tells her coldly. I feel like the earth is shattering underneath my feet. How could he do that to mama? To us? To me? He’s running around behind mama’s back with some floozie. He’s destroying our family.

Mama scoffs at him. “You’re going to marry her? Oh for god's sake Frank be serious.” 

“I’m finished with this Claire!” 

“You’ve been waiting. All this time you’ve been waiting for the clock to run out. Well Brianna is my daughter and I will not let you take her anywhere.” Mama seethes at him. 

“Yeah well I don’t think I’ll have to.” 

“You bloody bastard!” Mama screeches at him. 

I’ve heard enough of this. As quietly as I can I make my way out the back door and walk down the alley and out onto the street. I can’t believe papa. I truly can’t believe him. I wipe away the fresh tears that can’t seem to help but spring to my eyes over and over again. Does he truly care for me and mama so little? That he would simply abandon us after all of this time? I’m his daughter too for god’s sake. I feel a few raindrops fall on my face. For a moment I debate about returning home, but I can’t go back there. Back to all of the bickering and hate and hurt in that home. I find the small cafe around the corner I always go to before school and hide inside there instead. Sipping on a cup of coffee I stare out at the drizzling spring evening, devastation wracking me to my core. I can’t even bring myself to care about the fact I’m crying in public. It’s better than being back in that awful home...to be around that awful uncaring man. 

I must sit in that cafe for hours. The kindly old owner Mrs. O’Conner lets me stay past closing, but eventually she is finished cleaning and needs to head home. I walk home as slowly as I can, wanting to delay the inevitable conversation that is to come. I almost slip on the wet sidewalk twice despite going at a snail's pace. When I arrive home it’s to an empty house. Mama must have been called away to the hospital. Who knows where Bri and Papa went off to. Those two have always been thick as thieves. A club of their own. One that I was never a part of, that they would never let me be a part of. I hate him. I despise him. 

Late that night mama wakes me up. I expect her to tell me of what I already know. That papa is leaving us, that Bri will go with him. “Quinlee, Quin I am so sorry to wake you my darling but I have to tell you something.” Mama says with tears in her eyes. 

I sit up slowly, eyes still blurry with sleep. “What is it mama?” 

“There’s been an accident. Frank...your father was in a car accident and he - he didn’t make it.” She lets out through choked sobs. My heart stops.


	3. Chapter 3

ONE YEAR LATER

Bri and I head out to meet mama in the park nearby our house after school. We just completed our last set of finals today and were done with our first year at Harvard. Mama had a break because of a surgery cancellation and said she wanted to talk to us about something important. The sun is bright and shining warmly on the late spring day. I feel a sense of relief at being able to walk through the park without the worry of coursework and exams hanging over my head. The business and accounting program at Harvard was brutal. 

Mama spots us and waves us over. “There’s my girls. How did your finals go?” She asks with a tired smile on her beautiful face. 

“They went well. Although I think I could have done better on my English paper.” I lament. 

Brianna shrugs half heartedly. “They went alright.” She mumbles. Bri took papa’s passing the hardest out of all of us. She was the closest to him. The one who lost not just her dad, but her best friend. 

“Good, well that’s good...I wanted to ask what your summer plans were?” 

“I was offered an internship at Haskins and Sells in August. Otherwise I don’t have anything planned.” I tell mama. 

Bri crosses her arms and stares at the ground. “I was planning on taking a summer course. Why do you ask?” 

“Well I - I was thinking that we could all take a trip together. I thought we could go to England. I could show you two around London and maybe we could head up to the Scottish Highlands. It...it was a very special place for me once upon a time and I’d like to share it with you two.” 

I glanced up at mama surprised at the unexpected family vacation. “I would love to go with you mama. As long as I get home by August I don’t see why we can’t go.” 

“I - I don’t know if I can go. I’d have to rearrange my courses. I just…” Bri starts but mama stops her. “Please Bri, please it’s important to me. More important than you realize for both of you to come with me. I think, I think we need to spend some time together as a family.” 

Brianna shakes her head back and forth in contemplation for a few moments before sighing. “Fine, fine, alright I’ll go. I can work something out with my advisor I suppose.” 

I loop my arm through my taller twin’s one as we make our way back home after agreeing to the vacation with mama. Ever since puberty she’s had a good six inches on me. My twin was always tall, athletic, and lean while I was always short, soft, and curvy. Well short for my family anyways - five foot six is a perfectly respectable height to the rest of the world. 

By the end of the week we are on a plane to London. The city isn’t so different from Boston. Old brick buildings down every street with a placard detailing exactly what some famous person did on that spot hundreds of years ago. You can’t throw a stone in either city without hitting a historical monument. While we are having tea one morning mama’s eyebrows crinkle together, perturbed over something she has read in the paper. “What is it?” Brianna asks. 

“A - a friend of mine has passed. Reverend Reginald Wakefield. It says he just passed away a couple of weeks ago.” Mama mutters more to herself than to us. 

“Oh mama, I’m so sorry.” I tell her while placing my hand on top of hers. 

“We...we should go to the wake. Pay our respects. If you girls don’t mind making a detour when we go to Scotland that is?” 

Bri reaches out for mama’s other hand. “Of course mama. We should go.” 

The train ride through the highlands is beautiful. Stunning really. Something about the rolling hills calls to me. I’ve never seen anything quite like it. We used to go camping throughout the Northeast but it wasn’t quite the same. 

We arrive in the small town of Inverness and it feels like we have been transported back to another era. The town is still all original moss covered stone and ancient brick buildings. Mama seems to know exactly where to go. Brianna and I share a look. Neither of us realized she had spent quite this much time here. She seems to know the old town like the back of her hand as she navigates through it’s cobblestoned streets. 

We reach the recently deceased Reverend’s home just in time for the start of the wake. Brianna seems to immediately take notice of the tall brunette man making his way around the room. The young man finally makes his way to us. 

“Hello there. I’m Roger, Roger Mackenzie.” He introduces himself holding out a hand to mama first, she shakes it firmly. 

“Claire Randall. These are my daughters Brianna and Quinlee. We came to offer our condolences on the Reverend’s passing.” 

Roger nods solemnly. “Aye, thank you Mrs. Randall. It was kind of you to come. How did you know my father?” 

Mama looks down at her drink for a moment before answering. “I met your father many years ago when you were just a young boy. He - helped my husband with his familial genealogy project. He helped me as well with a project of my own...Your father was a wonderful and kind man. The reverend meant a great deal to me.” 

“He was a good man. Always willing to lend a hand.” Roger replies gruffly. He glances over at Bri for a moment longer than considered polite. “How long will you ladies be staying in town for then?” 

“Just for a few days. I wanted to show my daughters around Inverness while we had the chance.” Mama tells him. 

“Augh, well then, you should stop by tomorrow. I’d be happy to show you around.” Roger offers congenially. 

Bri is the one to answer instead. A small smile playing on her face. “That would be great, thanks for the offer. What um, what time should we come by then?” 

After leaving Roger’s home mama pulls off the side of the road and stops at a small monument commemorating the jacobites that died at the battle of Culloden. We walk along the moor. There is an odd sadness to the place. Maybe because so many died there once upon a time. I cannot place it. That evening as we ready ourselves for bed, mother seems distraught, like she’s in another world as she brushes her hair gazing out the window. “Something wrong mama?” Brianna is the one to ask. 

Mama sets down her hairbrush with shaky hands. “I - I think it’s time I told you both something. I just...need you to keep an open mind.” 

That is the night we find out who our father really is. Brianna looks devastated while I - I can’t help but feel a profound sense of relief. But when she tells us our father isn’t from this time she loses me. Completely loses us both.


	4. Chapter 4

SIX MONTHS LATER

After having spent the entire month of June and July trying to find any records of Jamie Fraser mama finally pulled the plug. Returning to Boston didn’t feel the same after that. Everything was just...different now. Like the entire world had been tilted on its axis after finding out about Jamie. I started having these, these vivid dreams of a tall man with wild red hair and piercing blue eyes calling out to me. Asking me to come to him. But the voice is distorted, like he’s talking under water. I always wake up with a start every time. 

Bri has been struggling even more than before. We both have. Just in different ways. She has completely withdrawn from her studies in history while I’ve completely thrown myself into my studies on accounting. Every time I try to talk to Bri about...about anything that happened this summer she lashes out in anger. I feel myself sinking further and further into myself. Not that I had many friends before all of this, people tend to avoid you when you look - look different, but the couple I did make since starting Harvard have drifted away. I can’t blame them. I’m an introverted neurotic mess these days. 

It’s the last day of the semester before Christmas break. Instead of feeling relief that finals are over I just feel...empty inside not having anything to do. I numbly help mama decorate the tree. She tries her best to engage with me but it’s like pulling teeth. I can tell she’s coming to her wits end with both Brianna and I. Later that afternoon Brianna comes home and makes an announcement. She’s taking a leave of absence from school. I’m not really surprised. The only reason Bri ever studied history was because of papa. I don’t think she really even liked the subject all that much. Her and mama instantly start screaming at each other. I go into the back kitchen and sit at the small table, hanging my head in my hands. I’ve never been one for confrontation, usually I would try and mediate between the two of them but I don’t seem to have it in me anymore. 

Then I hear the doorbell ring. Out of curiosity I pull myself up from the kitchen table and head back into the living room to see who it is. I’m pleasantly surprised to find Roger Mackenzie of all people standing in our Boston home. 

“What a wonderful surprise. What are you doing in town?” Mama stammers out. 

“I should’ve sent word. Clearly I’ve come at a bad time.” Roger says hesitantly. 

I lean against the archway to the living room. “It’s always a bad time Roger.” 

Mama gives me a hard glare before turning back to Roger. “Brianna and I were just…” 

“Yelling.” Bri interrupts while throwing her arms up in the air exasperated. 

Mama puts her hands on her hips and paces in front of the fireplace. “Uh, Brianna has decided to withdraw from Harvard and is moving out.” 

“Which is my decision to make!” Bri hisses back at her. 

“Let me call Dean Tramble. I'm sure he can have you reinstated.” Mama tells her firmly. 

Bri rolls her eyes and actually stomps her foot. “No! You’re not listening! I need a break! You expect me to come back to Boston and be who I was? I tried, and it’s not working.” 

A car horn honks outside. Bri looks at the door before picking up a box and heading towards it. “I have to go. I’m sorry Roger, it’s good to see you. Lets hang out tomorrow okay?” She says before flying out the door in a huff. 

I pour the three of us glasses of whiskey while mama profusely apologizes to Roger and takes his coat. She insists that he stay with us while he’s in Boston. We have a guest room after all. I head back into the kitchen to get dinner started. Mama may be talented at a great many things but cooking was never really her forte. After dinner I decide to retire early for the night. I can tell Roger is itching to talk to mama about something in private. I figure if it has anything to do with Jamie she’ll tell me about it in her own time. 

The next morning mama comes in and helps me do my hair for papa’s commemorative fellowship ceremony. She hums a song I don’t recognize as she combs out my unruly auburn curls before pinning the top half of my hair back with a gold clip she bought me years ago. Her clear blue eyes meeting my stormy gray ones in the mirror. “There you are, can finally see your beautiful face with your hair pulled back.” 

I feel a blush creep onto my cheeks. “You have to say that. You’re my mother.” 

“Maybe, it doesn't mean it isn’t true though.” She says with a fond smile before kissing my red hot cheek. 

I see Bri and Roger when we arrive and head over to join them, letting mama mingle with papa’s old work colleagues. Brianna seems...happier, more peaceful with Roger around. It’s a nice change of pace compared to her angry sour demeanour these past several months. We both notice the blond woman speaking with our mother. I wonder if that is Sandy?

Roger gets sucked into a conversation with one of the ancient history crones. Bri, mama, and I walk the ground of Harvard waiting for him to rejoin us. Mama seems to be conflicted as we walk in silence initially. 

“That blonde woman at the ceremony...I recognized her. Who was she?” Bri asks. 

“Uh, she was a student of your father’s.” Mama answers in a flustered manner. 

Bri seems to be recalling something. “I remember her. Papa and I were at a bookstore once and he stopped to talk to her. Something about it...the way he looked at her, it was the same way he used to look at you.” 

Mama looks at the ground but doesn’t answer the obvious question Bri is asking. “Back at the stones, we said no more lies. Only the truth.” I remind her softly.

“Frank loved her. It went on for many years, and he was planning on marrying her.” She finally admits. I can see the betrayal in Brianna’s eyes. The image of the man she so revered all her life chipped away at.

Mama pulls a piece of paper out of her pocket, holding it gingerly. “In the spirit of honesty, there is something else I need to tell you about.” 

She hands the piece of paper to Brianna and I. We open it up together and stare at the page momentarily confused until we see the name. Alexander Malcolm. “This is...this is Jamie?” I whisper with a mixture of shock and elation. 

“You found him?” Bri asks with tears in her eyes.

“Oh, Roger did.” She explains with a wave of her hand, voice thick with emotion. 

“Then you can go back.” I realize at the same time as I say it out loud. 

She shakes her head. “That’s not why I’m telling you this. My life is here, with you two.”

Bri sets a gentle hand on her arm. “Mama, we’re all grown up. We can live on our own.” 

“We love you mama, we love you but we don’t need you. Not the way we did when we were little.” I tell her, tears threatening to spill at any moment. 

“I know, I know.” She says before letting out a shaky breath. “Come on.” 

That night we sat down on the couch around the roaring fire. Egg nogs in hand. “Are you sure you two have thought this through?” Mama asks, not seeming to be convinced. 

“If I go...I may not be able to come back. It’s not like an elevator where you can just jump on and off.” Mama explains further. 

“But you’ve done it before.” I comment. 

“There are no guarantees. If I go we may never see each other again. Can you live with that? Because I’m not sure if I can.” She admits with tears in her eyes. Mama lets out a sigh. “To not be there to see you two get married...walk you down the aisle…to watch you become mothers, hold my first grandchild.”

“I know mama. It won’t be easy.” I tell her softly. 

Brianna gives her a serious look. “These past few months I’ve been trying to figure out if I’m more Randall or Fraser and what I’ve realized is that I’m more you than either of my fathers. If Quinlee and I turn out to be half the woman you are, we’ll be just fine.” 

I grab mama’s hand tightly. “We know you better than anyone. But you know who doesn’t know us? Jamie. You owe it to him to go back. I want you to go back and tell him everything.” 

A few days later it’s Christmas Eve. The four of us sit around the Christmas tree opening our gifts. I’ve been working on my gift for mama for the past three days straight. She opens Roger’s and Brianna’s gifts first. Money from that era, a topaz necklace as tribute for the stones, and a book of Scottish history. “This would have come in handy the first time around.” She comments dryly. 

“Well I wanted to get you a flashlight but Roger said you’d end up at another witch trial.” Brianna jokes with a large grin. The biggest grin I’ve seen on her face since our summer in Scotland.

Mama turns to me as I hand her my gift. She opens the rather large box confused at first, but then that confusion turns into happiness as she sees what’s inside. “You made me a dress!” 

“Yep! Matching overcoat as well. Made it out of raincoat material so it should be waterproof. Plus the corset has a zipper, thought it was more practical.” 

“You are an absolute genius my dear. I think in another life you must have been a seamstress.” Mama jokes as she pulls the garments out and holds them up one by one. She gives me a large kiss on the cheek and thanks me for the gift. 

“I’ve been thinking a lot about what else I’ll need. I borrowed some scalpels and penicillin from the hospital.” Mama admits with a playful grin. 

“Clever.” Roger remarks while holding up his cup of eggnog. 

“Well I thought 1767 Edinburgh will need it more than 1969 Boston. Thank you all. Your gifts are incredibly generous.” She says once more before giving us another hug. 

It’s New Year’s Eve, the night mama’s plane is scheduled to take off. The two of us stand with mama in the foyer. Our last moments to see her before she leaves for - forever possibly. Mama fiddles with one of Bri’s bright red tresses. “Roger’s a good one you know.” 

“I know.” Brianna replies with a knowing grin. She always did have a thing for the pretty smart boys, even back in high school. 

Mama turns to me and hands me some paperwork. “Give the letter on top to Joe. It’s my resignation letter, he’ll know what to do. Beneath it is the deed to the house. Your names are on it now, along with all of the bank accounts.” 

“I can’t believe you’re not letting us come with you to Scotland.” I tell her sorrowfully. 

Mama cups both of our faces in her loving hands. “This is how I want to do it. First time I went through I was terrified. Second time, heartbroken. This time I want it to be peaceful. If I had to say goodbye to you two there...I might never go.” 

“Well, that’s not an option.” I tell her through my sniffles. 

“Oh my beautiful girls. I’m gonna miss you so much.” She says with a broken voice, pulling us into a deep hug. 

“We’ll be fine mama. Find our father and give him this.” Bri kisses mama on the cheek. 

Mama wipes the tears out of her eyes. “There is one more thing I wanted to give the two of you.” She hands us each a necklace of beautiful pearls. “Scottish pearls. Jamie gave these to me on our wedding night. They were his mother’s. Ellen, your grandmother. You could wear them on your wedding day too if you like.” 

She gives us one last lingering embrace. I try my best to memorize everything about her, every last detail about my mother for the last time before she departs. Then she’s gone. Leaving Bri, Roger and I in her wake.


	5. Chapter 5

EIGHTEEN MONTHS LATER

I couldn’t believe that I had finished my third year, that I was almost done with college. With all of the extra courses I had taken I only have one semester left this fall and then I’m done. Finished, ready to move on to my next adventure in life. After my internship with Haskins and Sells they offered me a part time job during school with the promise of coming on as a full fledged licensed accountant once I graduated. 

So much had changed in such a short amount of time. Brianna had quit Harvard and transferred to MIT to major in engineering. She seemed to blossom, to find her purpose in life just as I had. I was good with numbers too but in a different way. While I enjoyed algebra and calculus and tracking numbers on a ledger Brianna excelled in geometry and physics and design. The anger and bitterness she carried with her since papa’s death seemed to gradually fade away over the past several months. Although I don’t know if that had more to do with the change of major or the change of boyfriends. Whenever I brought up Roger her face lit up like a Christmas tree. She flew out to Oxford last summer and he came for Christmas here in Boston again last year. 

In fact Roger was coming into town tomorrow to participate in a Scottish festival up in North Carolina. The three of us were going to take a road trip up to the Carolina mountains. Grandfather mountain to be precise. Apparently there was a large Scottish population that immigrated to North Carolina around the time of the revolutionary war. Their ancestors still live there and carry on their Scottish heritage to this day. Roger and Brianna make the long car ride enjoyable, we play word games and listen to the radio and eat nothing but fast food the entire time. I’ve haven’t seen Bri laugh so much since we last saw Roger over Christmas. She has the most boisterous full bodied laugh in the world. You cannot stop yourself from joining in. It fills my heart with joy to finally see my twin smiling again. After all of the turmoil and pain we have suffered as a family she deserves every happiness in the world. 

We arrive just as twilight is settling in. The last rays of sunlight streaming across the tall jagged mountains. The crisp summer breeze greets us as we get out of the car. A woman in a long plaid skirt comes up to us and introduces herself as the event coordinator. She shows us to the cabins we will be staying in for the week. 

The next morning we go to the tent where the ceilidh is taking place. “I had no idea there were so many Scots in North Carolina.” Bri remarks in surprise at the number of people in attendance. I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many other redheads congregated in one place before. Many have bright fire truck red hair like Brianna while others have darker auburn red hair like mine. 

“They said the mountains were settled by Scots in the eighteenth century. I hope it’s not too upsetting for you being here?” Roger laments. 

“No, no I’ll be alright it just...it does remind me of my mother.” Bri comments softly. 

“I wonder if she’s alright. If she found Jamie. If she’s happy.” I say while gripping onto Brianna’s hand tightly. 

She squeezes back gently. “I like to believe she did.”

Roger and Bri wander off to get their portrait painted. I give the two love birds their space. A budding romance doesn’t need a third wheel constantly following them around. I wander through the various tents, enjoying all of the festivities. I get a few odd looks although I don’t know if that’s because of my leg braces or because I’m walking about on my own. 

I come upon one tent containing various historical records, equipment, and paintings of the settlers to the area. I pick up a few of the old medical tools on display and wonder if my mother has ever used such equipment before. If maybe she is using such equipment as we speak. I grin warmly thinking of mama. 

I move on to investigate the paintings of the families and various influential settlers to the Carolina mountains. It says they are donated from the descendants of the area. Placards containing information on the people in the paintings sits underneath each one. Suddenly I come to a stop, frozen in place. I see a portrait of a family. A tall blonde man with striking ice blue eyes and broad shoulders standing behind a young woman. A woman who looks identical to me. It’s like looking in a mirror. The portraits dark gray eyes staring back at me with a knowing smile playing across her lips. Four children are in the painting. Three little boys and one baby girl the woman is holding in her arms. A large beautiful blue home with a brick fireplace on the side is in the background. Sitting proudly on top of a hill. Tall willow trees all around it. Taking in a stuttering breath I force myself to look down at the painting's placard. 

May 1778. The Northman Family. Field Major Erik Northman fought in the Continental Army. He was a Scandanavian immigrant who moved to North Carolina with his father as a toddler. His father, Jorgen Northman, was granted a substantial amount of farm land north of Yadkin river when they arrived in North Carolina in 1743. Major Erik Northman returned to tend his lands at the end of the revolutionary war and remained there with his wife, a Scottish woman named Quinlee, until his passing in 1828. They had four children pictured left to right - Jorgen, James, Jonas, and Jocasta. The land still remains within the Northman family to this day. 

I stare at the painting for several long moments. Each moment feels like an infinite universe within itself. That can’t be...can’t be me? It’s impossible. Absolutely impossible. I can’t breathe, oh god I can’t breathe. I have to get out of here. Stumbling out of the tent as fast as I can manage I accidentally smash into several people on my way out. Finally managing to break through the doorway and pull in the fresh air my lungs have been gasping for. I walk straight ahead into the woods. Clinging onto the trees before my vision goes white and I pass out. 

When I come to I’m somehow back in my cabin. A person with a nurses uniform hovering over me along with Brianna and Roger. I groan as I open my eyes slowly. “Wha - what happened?” 

Bri pulls me into a tight hug. The nurse yells something at her but I don’t catch it. “Oh my god Quin don’t you ever scare me like that again! I about had a heart attack! What were you thinking wandering off into the woods like that on your own? You were lucky some passerby spotted you.” 

“I - I’m alright Bri. It’s okay.” I manage to croak out through my parched lips. 

“Miss Randall she needs her rest!” The nurses hisses at my twin. Brianna gives her a withering glare but releases me nonetheless.

I go in and out of consciousness for the rest of the afternoon. By the time I wake up again it’s past nine. Pulling myself out of the bed groggily I make my way towards the bathroom. All I need is a hot bath. Everything can be solved by a hot bath can’t it? As I lower myself into the piping water I heave out a weary sigh. Maybe I imagined the entire thing, dreamed up the painting of me with a family. I’m sure my psychology professor would have a field day coming up with various theories as to why I would imagine such a thing. I can’t help it. I can’t help but sob as I rock myself back and forth. I miss them. How could I miss people that I don’t even know? That probably is just an overactive figment of my subconscious? 

The next morning Brianna is quiet which is unusual for her. I thought she was planning on spending that night in Roger’s cabin. She doesn’t respond when I try to ask her about it. I assume that means things did not go as planned last evening. Both of them are too hot headed for their own good. Deciding to be far braver than I have any right to pretend I leave the cabin and head back to the tent with the paintings. I have to know - know if it was real. It’s too early, the tent entrance is still tied up. In for a penny in for a pound as papa used to say. I untie the strings on the flap and open it. Making my way through the maze of antiquities I finally find it again. That damn painting. Reaching out I gingerly brush my fingers over the face of the man, Major Erik Northman apparently. There is something so terribly familiar about him. The painting is real. The girl in the painting named Quinlee with auburn hair and gray eyes just like mine is...real. The rational logical side of my brain tells me it’s just a strange coincidence, but since when has anything been coincidental in this family? 

The drive home is long and mostly silent. Roger barely muttered a goodbye to me before catching a cab to the Wilmington Airport. I don’t even know if he said goodbye to Brianna or not. My twin and I don’t even listen to radio as we drive with the windows down back to Boston. Both lost in our own thoughts. It isn’t until we stop in a hotel that evening and I come out of the bathroom to see Brianna in tears sitting on her bed that I wrap my arms around my tall twin. Rubbing my hand gently up and down her back as she sobs into my shoulder. I make soft shushing noises and rock her back and forth, just like mama used to do. Bri finally tells me what happened when she went to Roger’s cabin, about how he proposed and she didn’t accept. I understand why she did it. The idea of being married, of being beholden and responsible for another person’s happiness, is terrifying. It’s not exactly like we had a good example of a healthy functional marriage growing up.


	6. Chapter 6

SIX MONTHS LATER

I hear the door open just as I’m pulling the turkey out of the oven. “Quin where are you?” Bri yells out. 

“In the kitchen!” I yell back while caramelizing carrots on the fry pan. 

Bri flies into the kitchen with wind swept hair, bright eyes, and a wide smile on her face. “Quin you are never going to believe it! Roger called and he found news about mama and Jamie!” 

“What?! What did he find?” I ask, almost dropping the pan I’m holding in the process. 

“You know the mountain in North Carolina we visited this summer? Grandfather mountain? Well apparently it used to be called Mount Helion and Roger found an excerpt in there about a tract of land called Fraser’s Ridge. He contacted the author and discovered that Jamie and mama were early settlers on the mountain! The governor granted Jamie the land apparently and they moved there in 1768.” She regales me excitedly. 

I feel my heart pound in my chest. They were settlers on the mountain? The same mountain where the young woman in the painting was from? “O - oh! They came to America? Who would have thought.” I comment while turning around to grab the rolls and head into the dining room. I don’t want Bri to see my terrified face right now. 

“I know right! It makes sense they ended up in North Carolina given all of the Scottish immigrants. Isn’t that incredible!” Bri rants excitedly, following me into the dining room. 

“Incredible, yes…” I mumble while realigning the forks again. 

“Is that all you have to say? I thought you would be more…” 

I cut her off. “Oh no, it’s nothing like that Bri. Sorry. I am beyond happy to know that mama is safe. Really I am, just a long day is all.”

She eyes me skeptically. “Oh, sorry I didn’t mean to insinuate anything. Are you feeling alright?” Bri crinkles her eyebrows at me in concern. 

I wave her off. “It’s nothing Bri, really, nothing to worry about. Just worn down is all.” 

Brianna helps me finish setting the table and luckily brings the turkey out for me. God knows I don’t think I would have been able to carry it that far. I could barely pull it in and out of the oven. We have a comfortable thanksgiving dinner as we reminisce about mama and papa. Since she moved out we haven’t had many dinners together. This is nice. I never notice how lonely I am in this large empty home until she comes over. Brianna’s presence can fill up a room. I think of the man and the children and the home in that painting. It seemed so...full of life. The thought of it sends a pang through my chest. A pang of loss and heartache. 

Brianna leaves far too soon to meet up with her roommate and some of her friends at MIT for a late party. The house feels dark and empty again the moment she departs. A loneliness seeps into my soul as I head towards my bedroom and fall into a fitful sleep. 

Two weeks later I finished my last final. The last school exam I will ever have to take. My advisor tells me I can pick up my diploma as soon as my grades are in next week. Brianna takes me out for dinner and drinks that night. Just the two of us. She gives me a big hug and congratulates me profusely. I can see the pride in her beaming smile. Neither of us particularly look like mama but when Bri smiles...I don’t know it feels like mama is with us again. 

Picking up the piece of paper I’ve been working my butt off for the past three and a half years is much more anti-climatic than I imagined. As I return home I check the mail and see a letter from the accounting firm I’m going to start at in January. Opening it I’m surprised to see just how much they are offering as my base salary. I guess my teacher was right, a degree from Harvard does make a difference. Heading into papa’s office I glance around debating about what to do. So far we’ve practically kept it as a shrine to the man, but he passed over three years ago now. Eventually we have to move on don’t we? I set my diploma and the letter from work down on the mahogany wood table. I know him and I had a rocky relationship, well not so much rocky as it was nonexistent, but I like to think he would have been proud of me finishing college. Proud of me getting a respectable job at a prestigious firm. Maybe it’s time I turn this into my own office. I think he would have wanted it to be put to good use. 

I sit down in the large leather chair. The scent of tobacco still clings to it just a bit. It gives me a sense of nostalgia and bitter sadness - sadness that him and I did not love each other as we should have. Letting out a sigh I figure it is best to start by organizing his desk drawers. Seeing what papers need to be kept and what should be thrown out. Most of them are old student assignments that he hadn’t yet gotten around to grading. There is one folder in the very back with the label on it reading “JF”. Curious about the odd title I pull it out, not quite sure what to expect. All that it contains is a single piece of paper. It’s an eighteenth century obituary. Why on earth would papa have kept this? Then I catch the names. James and Claire Fraser. My entire body freezes. He knew, all this time he knew mama was going to go back. He knew that she was going to...oh my god. I scan every single inch of the paper looking for clues. The article reads that a house fire on Fraser’s ridge claimed their lives on January 21, 177...but the last number is smudged. I can’t tell what year exactly it’s supposed to happen. Only that it will be between 1770 and 1779. 

I rush over to the phone, newspaper clipping still in hand. “Hello?” Brianna answers on the first ring. “Bri! I found something. It’s about Jamie and mama. You need to come over now.” 

This isn’t exactly how I expected to spend new years day. Dressed up in the closest replica of an eighteenth century dress and cloak I could make in five days time while traipsing about the moores of the Scottish highlands looking for a stone circle. Brianna boldly takes the lead in her typical fearless manner tugging me along behind her trying to get me to hurry up. I can only move so fast with leg braces. At the very least the old fashioned dress covers them up so you can’t really tell. It’s all about the silver linings in life. 

The night Bri came over after I found that article we both decided we had to go back. We had to stop the obituary from coming true. We had to warn our parents of what was to come. The further away we get from Inverness the more nervous I become. I get this deep disturbing aching feeling in my bones, in the center of my core...this is it. If I go through with this I won’t be coming back. I don’t know how and I don’t know when but I will become the girl in the painting. The content wife and mother with a mischievous smile in that damn painting. As we gaze upon the rocks of craigh na dun I feel elation yet terror, happiness yet despair, confusion yet certainty.

Brianna intertwines her hand with mine as we both pause and stare at the imposing circle. An ancient otherworldly feeling takes a hold of me. An energy seems to reverberate through the ground itself as we slowly approach the stones. Then we hear it. A buzzing sound like a swarm of bees. It starts off faint at first, just a humm really, but it gets louder and louder the more we draw near. Until it’s so loud it makes my teeth rattle. It’s almost like a pulsing sensation is coming off of the largest stone in the circle. Beckoning us towards it. Brianna and I look at each other one more time. Her crystal blue eyes meet my gray ones. We give each other tiny nods before both placing our hands out. When we are only a couple of inches away. Bri glances over at me again. “Ready?” She whispers. “Ready.” 

Our hands touch the stone at the same time. A blinding white light surrounds us and the buzzing turns into a loud cracking sound, louder than thunder, then we are falling. Tumbling down, down, down for what feels like eternity. The only thing I can possibly compare it to is being on the roller coaster at Coney island as a little girl only a thousand times worse. Suddenly I feel hard ground against my back and icy cold grass beneath my fingers. My other hand still intertwined with Brianna’s. It takes several moments for me to even consider sitting up. My head swims the moment I try. Bri seems to recover quicker and helps lean me up against a nearby tree to catch my breath. “Are you alright?” She asks in a shaky voice. 

I take a few gasping breaths before answering. “I’m fine, just needed a moment.” I’m able to haul myself off the tree and stand up on my still trembling legs. My tall twin loops her arm through mine as we walk away from the circle. A chill runs through me in the cold weather. I figured the day we returned might be colder than the day we left but I didn’t realize it would be quite this freezing. We both pull the cloaks I made a bit tighter around our chests. Brianna pulls out the map we found of eighteenth century Scotland along with our papa’s old compass. Once we get our bearings of what direction to go we set out on our long journey. 

It is strange not seeing any roads at all. No street signs, no lights from Inverness...nothing. We make it as far as we can for the day before setting up camp for the night. Brianna is able to get a fire started. I pull out the sandwiches I made for our journey and hand her one. We huddle close to the warmth the fire provides, wrapping ourselves further into the small quilts we brought with us. Couldn’t bring a waterproof sleeping bag unfortunately, it would be too obviously different for this time. We cling to each other that night for warmth and comfort. Being in a strange land in a strange time all on our own. 

The next morning we rise with the sun. By mid afternoon I think we are close to the edge of Lallybroch lands if I remember from our road trip with mama a couple of years ago. The port to book passage to America isn’t far past that. Just as we are going over a particularly large hill Brianna is the one to trip and go tumbling down it. “BRI!!!” I scream out. She puts her hand out to stop me from running after her and meeting the same fate. “I’m alright. It’s okay. I just - I think I sprained my ankle.” She says through clenched teeth. Carefully as I can I make my way down to her. We’re able to get her up and further down the hill to the tiny creek at the bottom of it. I help get her boot off to inspect the foot. She lets out a low hiss. Shit. This is bad. The ankle is purple and swollen. I touch the medial and lateral aspects like I saw mama do with my ankles after the hundreds of times I rolled them over the years. Bri winces “fuck that hurts!” 

“Sorry, sorry! I don’t think it’s broken though.” I mutter my apology. “If you think you can tolerate it try putting your foot in the water. It will numb the pain and decrease the swelling.” 

Brianna cries out a string of curses as she puts her ankle in the January water. She holds it there for as long as she can before yanking it out. I roll her thick wooly sock back on as gently as I possibly can. Ripping off a piece of my underskirt I wrap up the ankle to keep it as immobile as possible although I don’t know how much good that will do at this point. We slide her boot back over her foot and I loop her arm over my shoulder to help her stand. 

As we hobble along Brianna turns to me. “Since when did you get so good at nursing?” 

I let out a tiny huff. “Picked up a few things from mama over the years. She was always so worried about my ankles.” 

Glancing all around us we look for any sign of life. Brianna needs shelter, a place to rest, she’s going to be off her foot for several days at least. Finally I spot a nice sized cottage just off the horizon. We don’t say much as we make the arduous journey towards the abode. I just hope they are friendly enough to let us take shelter for a few days. The closer we get to the house the more I notice Brianna struggling. I’ve never seen Bri like this before. She’s always been larger than life - hated showing any weakness. Wanted to be the strong one. The girl on fire who would take on the world before admitting defeat. She leans on me more and more the further we get down the worn path to the cabin until I can’t hold her anymore. I just barely manage to sit her up against a nearby tree before she completely collapses. Her eyes roll into the back of her head, her usually golden skin flushing pale as snow. Panic claws at my throat and eats it’s way into my stomach. “It’s okay, it’s going to be okay. I’m going to get help. I’ll be right back Brianna I promise. Right back.” I tell her hurriedly before sprinting as fast as I can to the cabin up the road. Praying to whatever god is listening above to help my sister. 

A kindly looking middle aged blonde woman opens the door as I pound on it screaming for help. Her large blue eyes stare at me, filled with worry. “Whatever is the matter lass?” 

“My - my sister. She’s h-hurt. Tripped, tripped on a hill and fell. It’s her ankle, she can’t walk anymore and she just, just passed out on a tree. Please, please I need your help.” I beg through my ragged stuttering breaths. 

“Alright lass calm yerself. Let us get the horse and cart and we’ll fetch yer sister.” The kind woman reassures me before hustling towards the barn. Oh thank you lord, thank you.

We ride out to find my sister. She is still passed out cold right where I left her. Her shallow breaths unsteady. She seems to come to somewhat as we get her on the back of the cart and she grimaces in pain. Our saviour glances back at Brianna anxiously but hurries the horse along as fast as she can to get us back to the cabin. 

She helps me get Brianna into one of the bedrooms upstairs and puts a bed warmer under the covers before stoking the fire back to life. I cup my twins face gently. Her skin seems to be regaining some of its color now. I let out a deep ragged breath in relief. “Oh thank god.” I blubber out through the thick tears running down my cheeks. 

The kind lady puts her hands gently on my shoulders. “Come lass. Let us give her time to rest. I’ve got a stew cooking over the fire. We should get some food in your belly.” 

She guides me downstairs and tells me her name is Leerie as she serves me a heaping bowl of rabbit stew. A young girl with red hair just like Bri peaks around the corner and looks at me shyly. Leerie motions for her to come inside and the little girl sits next to her mother, hesitantly glancing at me from across the table. “This is my youngest Joanie. What’s yer name lassie?” 

“Oh, I beg your pardon, sorry my name is Quinlee. My sister is Brianna. I can’t thank you enough for your help, truly, I don’t know what we would have done if we had not found you.” 

Leerie waves me off. “Twas nothing child. I would hope that if one of my bairns were ever hurt someone would take them in and care for them. Is the soup warming?” 

“Yes, yes it’s delicious. Thank you.” I tell her profusely and honestly. 

I try to help with cleaning up after we finish our meal but Leerie practically pushes me back up the stairs to the bedroom and insists I get some sleep. When I enter the room I see Brianna has seemed to stir slightly. I help her sit up and make sure she drinks some water and gets out of her cold wet dress. She leans back on the pillow and almost immediately falls back asleep. I strip myself out of my dress and find a clean white shift in the chest at the end of the bed that Leerie told me to look in. Throwing on the dry night dress I slip under the warm covers and curl up next to my twin before closing my exhausted eyes and leaving the world of the living behind. 

Brianna doesn’t leave the room for the first couple of days. The sprain is one of the worst I’ve ever seen. Practically swollen to the size of a softball and looks the color of eggplant. She can’t put any weight on it at first, but by day three she can finally make it across the room as long as her ankle is wrapped up. I spend as much time as I can helping Leerie and Joanie downstairs in the kitchen and outside in the small garden. 

As we pick carrots in the garden bed Leerie asks where I am travelling to. “We are trying to reach Ayr Harbor. Our parents are in the America’s and we are going to meet them there.” 

She gives me a perturbed look. “Ye’re a fair way from any harbor I know of lass. Were ye truly of a mind to walk by yerself’s?” 

“We uh, we were hoping to catch a ride with someone along the road.” I explain. 

She gives me a soft smile before patting me on the shoulder. “Well, ye don’t worry about it. Ye and yer sister may stay as long as ye need.” 

They are a kind mother and daughter. They seem wanting for company though and chat constantly, especially little Joanie once she got over her shyness. She tells me Brianna reminds her of her big sister Marsali. Leerie says her eldest daughter is in America, happily married and settled with a new baby. 

Brianna never being one to be kept down long is quick to recover from her injury. With any luck we will be back on the road by the end of the week and not have to intrude any longer on Leerie’s hospitality. A man with a peg leg stops by one evening and drops off some money from her husband who ran away with another. It seems as though money is tight. I met him for a moment in the kitchen. He gave me a double take when he saw me. The man apologized for staring, he said I reminded him of his mother in law. An uncanny resemblance apparently. 

Brianna and I both head out into the gardens the next morning. Leerie and Joanie greet us with a warm smile.

“I hope you’ll both forgive the intrusion yesterday.” Leerie notes with a tone of embarrassment. 

“What? No it’s us who are intruding.” Brianna says firmly. “You have been so kind.” I add on. 

Leerie looks back down at the soil she is tilling. “Ye must think me uncouth. Arguin’ with a man in my parlor late in the night.” 

“Was he your husband?” Brianna asks. 

“Oh no, no a messenger only. Comes bearing ill tides each month. Kin of my former husband. Comes to remind me that the money I am owed wilna be paid.” 

I wince at her understandingly. “I’m sorry, that must be difficult.” 

Leerie lets out a weary sigh. “Times are hard I willna lie.” She glances over at us approvingly. “I’m glad to see the dresses fit both of ye. Figured ye’d be near my Marsali’s size. Something woolen will serve ye much better for yer voyage at sea.”

“Thank you.” Brianna tells her gratefully. 

Leerie heads inside to put the basket of roots collected into the stew. We ask Joanie a little more about her father. She tells us that the man is her da, but he’s not her real father. Her real father died a few years ago. Her step-dad is Leerie’s second husband. Joanie says he never loved her ma as her ma loved him. Reminds Brianna and I about mama and papa and their own tortuous relationship.

Two days later Brianna is fixing the cabinet while I’m helping cut up vegetables in the kitchen with Leerie. “Is yer ankle better?” Leerie asks Bri. 

“Almost, we’ll be on our way soon. Should be well enough in a day or two.” Briann answers. 

“Dinna worry yerself. It has been a blessing having you lassies with us.” 

Joanie comes skipping into the kitchen with flowers in her long red braid. “Look at ye Joanie! It’s not like ye to keep your braid for so long.” Leerie comments happily. 

Brianna begins singing out. “If you’re going to San Francisco, be sure to wear some flowers in your hair.” 

“I dinna ken that one.” Joanie looks up at her confused. 

I laugh softly. “It’s our mother’s favourite song.” 

“Some of the girls from Lallybroch would put flowers in their hair in summer.” Joanie tells us. 

“Lallybroch?” I ask surprised by the mention of the name.

“Aye it’s not far from here.” Leerie pipes up. 

“Our relatives live there. We’ve never met them but our mother always spoke so fondly of them.” Brianna explains. 

“And who might yer mother be? I may have kent her spendin’ a bit of time in Lallybroch myself.” Leerie inquires politely. 

“Claire Fraser. Do you know her?” I answer this time. 

Leerie’s face falls instantly. She stares tensley down at the table. “Ye never said yer name was Fraser.” 

“Oh, it's - it's not. Our name is Randall, after the father who raised us.” Brianna rushes to explain, confused at the woman’s sudden change in demeanour. 

“I see. The husband yer mother didna care for. I heard ye and Joanie speaking of it in the gardens the other day.” Leerie says while slicing a turnip in half. 

“She cared for him, she just…” I trail off unsure how to word it. 

“Didna love him as she loved this other man...yer true father. Must have been a good man, this Mr. Randall to have raised two daughters such as yerselfs.” Leerie finishes for me. 

“Yes he was. He died some years ago.” Brianna tells her. 

“I’m sorry to hear it. Do you believe the story yer mother told ye? About yer true father and why he couldna raise ye two?” Leerie inquires in a cold tone. 

I stare back at her confused. “Of course. Why wouldn’t we? She’s our mother after all.” 

“Well, folks talk at Lallybroch. ‘Course I wouldna wanna repeat what they say about yer father.” 

“What do they say?” Brianna demands. 

Leerie finally looks up at us. “Well, I dinna repeat such things myself, but there are some folk who say there was no room in his heart for bairns and he sent yer mother away upon findin’ she was with child.” 

“They were married and in love. Why wouldn’t he want a child?” Bri questions accusingly. 

“Tis but whispers hereabouts. I shouldna told ye two but I didna want ye to hear it from folk elsewhere. People gossip.” Leerie tries to say in a reassuring manner. 

“Well it doesn’t matter either way. We still have to find our parents.” I tell her while slicing through a carrot. 

“Why is the matter so pressing?” Leerie questions in frustration. 

Brianna answers this time. “This will sound strange but they need our help. We can prevent their deaths if we go to them now. There’s going to be a fire otherwise.” 

Leerie stares at her suspiciously. “How would ye ken such a thing like that?” 

“We can’t explain it.” I try to answer as best I can. 

Leerie throws her knife down on the table and glares at us with malice and venom in her eyes. “If there’s something that will prevent me receiving my alimony, ye’d best speak of it.” 

“Your alimony? What does this have to do with you?” Brianna asks, agitated. 

Leerie points an accusing finger at us. “How dare ye! How dare ye come into my home and treat me in such a way! Did they send ye two? Is that what happened? Did they send ye to bewitch me just like your ma? Ye’re witches just like her aren’t ye?” 

I’m becoming more confused by the minute. “You know our mother?” 

“Aye, I ken yer mother well. You’re mother was the thievin’ whore who stole my husband and left me destitute. Bewitched him she did, with a love spell that made me invisible.” She screeches at us. 

I hold up my hands in a placating manner. “We never meant to hurt anyone, neither did our mother. I’m sorry. I can see we are no longer welcome here.” 

Brianna grabs a hold of my arm and pulls me up the stairs to the room we have been using to pack away our things. We need to leave now. 

Leerie appears at the doorway, her hate filled gaze seering into us. “Claire Fraser shoulda burnt at the stake in Cranesmuir.” 

“Oh my god. It was you. You’re the one who tried to get her killed.” I whisper softly. 

“Aye, and she would be dead if she wasna a witch.”

“I’m sure believing that is easier than facing the truth. And the truth is, Jamie Fraser never loved you.” Bri hisses at her vehemently.

“You spawn of a witch. I’ll have you both arrested for witchcraft. Just like your mother!” She screams in fury at us before slamming the door shut and bolting it. 

“No! No, shit! No! Let us out!” Brianna cries out. Grabbing at the door and yanking it as hard as she can, the thing doesn’t even budge. 

I run to the windows and pull at the handles but the locks on them are stuck. “Damn it!” 

Bri comes over and uses a lever to try and pry the lock on the window open when we hear keys jangling in the lock on the door. Brianna pulls me behind her and moves us so we are behind the door. She holds her arm up ready to strike who ever comes through with the heavy piece of wood she’s holding. We wait with bated breath but instead of Leerie or a village mob it’s only Joanie who comes through the door. Bri and I let out a sigh of relief. 

“Come on.” Joanie whispers motioning for us to follow her quietly. We make our way outside and around the back to the barn. The horse is already set up to the cart. The three of us hop on it as quickly as we can. Joanie taps the horses rear with a stick and the animal bolts forwards. 

I glance backwards expecting to see Leerie chasing after us but the woman is nowhere to be seen. Brianna squeezes my hand reassuringly as we jostle down the rickety road. It becomes clear soon enough where Joanie is taking us as the cart pulls up to the gates of Lallybroch. It looks so different from the ruins we visited with mama. Full of life. 

“Thank you Joanie.” I murmur softly pulling the small girl into a hug. 

“Ye’re a kind soul. It’s not yer fault yer ma’s a witch. When ye find Da, mebbe ye’ll ask him to come home?” She questions hopefully. I just give her another tight squeeze. I don’t want to lie to the girl or give her false hope. 

“Joanie! What are you doing with the travelers?” The man who came by Leerie’s house earlier in the week calls out to us. 

“Uncle Ian! They’re Jamie Fraser’s daughters!” She says confidently. 

Ian stares at us wide eyed. “I think it’s best if you lasses come inside for a moment.” 

Joanie waves at us with a large gleeful smile as she turns the cart around and starts back to her mother’s cottage. We follow Ian inside of Lallybroch. Before we get the chance to think of a way to convince this man we are who we claim he turns towards us. “I think there’s something you need to see.” 

Ian leads us down a hallway and points towards a portrait of a young red haired woman hanging on the wall. She’s the spitting image of Brianna and I. Slightly sharper features than the heart shaped face Bri and I share, but otherwise the woman has bright red curly hair like Brianna with dark storm cloud gray eyes just like mine. 

“You don’t have to convince me you are who you say you are. In all my years I have never seen such a stark resemblance to my mother in law. Jamie and Claire told us they had twin girls. Your ma said she had to remarry, raise you in Boston after the war when she thought Jamie had passed. Certainly couldna be anyone else but the two of ye. Brianna and Quinlee right?” He says with a broad grin.

Staring at the painting of our grandmother I feel a sense of kinship with the woman and her mischievous smile...it reminds me of the other painting from the festival. “She’s beautiful.” Brianna whispers behind me. “Yes, yes she is.” 

Ian tells us his wife Jenny is away helping with one of their grandchildren for the next few days. That she would have loved to meet us. We try our best to explain why we need to leave so abruptly for the colonies but our uncle simply holds up his hand. “I learned a long time ago that when it comes to your mother it is best not to ask too many questions.” 

Ian insists we eat some lunch while he has one of servants bring down the trunk with some of mama’s old clothes in it for our travels. He comes to the table and sits down with us before sliding a bag full of coins towards us. I stare at the man in shock over his generosity. “Oh we could not possibly accept this. You’ve done so much already. It’s too much.” I stammer out.

“I won’t hear any of that. Yer family and we look after our own. Ye ken? Besides, we have to send someone to the America’s to tell our youngest son to write his mother more.” 

Uncle Ian and his servants take us to Ayr Harbor the next morning. We are both wrapped up in woolen fur lined cloaks of our mother’s with plaid woolen skirts underneath. All of the layers are so heavy - heavy but warm. As we are paying for passage on a vessel to Wilmington a man approaches us. He begs for us to take his daughter, Lizzie, on our journey as an indentured servant. We try to say no but when we look at her face, at the fear in her eyes at having her contract bought by a man who wants her in his bed we agree to take her and buy an extra ticket. 

Ian gives us specific instructions to ask for our great auntie Jocasta in Riverrun up Crosscreek once we make it to Wilmington. He hands us a letter with the Fraser family crest sealed over it to give to her as proof of our kinship when we arrive. Jocasta will be able to help us reach our parents once we are finally back in America. 

Uncle Ian helps us aboard the ship, the Phillip Allonzo. “You have your father’s fire within you lassies, and I’m not just speaking of the red hair you all share. You are both Frasers through and through.” He gives us each a large enveloping hug before stepping off the ship and waving after us with a broad grin on his face.

The journey is long and arduous. Weeks upon weeks of rolling on the high seas. If I never have to look at hardtack again it will be too soon. When we reached land I could have kissed the ground. We find an inn to spend the night at. After getting settled upstairs Brianna and I go back down to inquire about getting to Riverrun. 

I grab the attention of the barkeep. “Excuse us, do you know where we might find passage to Crosscreek? We’d like to leave tomorrow if possible.”

“The Sally Ann is in port. It takes the journey every week or so. You can ask Captain Freeman.” The barkeep tells us. 

“Brianna? Quinlee?” A familiar voice calls out from behind us. 

I turn around slowly only to see Roger standing before us. Am I hallucinating? 

“You’re here.” Brianna whispers breathlessly. Okay, so not hallucinating. He came for her. He actually came across time for her. She rushes into his arms and he binds her to him tightly. “Oh, thank god. Thank god I found you!” He mutters into her hair. 

“Roger! I can’t believe you came! What - what are you doing here?” I ask. 

He lets go of Brianna and gives me a quick hug before pulling back. “Why looking for you two sorry saps of course. At no small risk to life and limb I might add.”

“You weren’t supposed to come here. That wasn’t the plan.” Brianna proclaims. 

He scoffs at her. “And what, you call tearing off into bloody nowhere a plan?” 

Bri lets out a huff. “No, I would have told you but I - I didn’t know where we stood after the last time we talked.” 

“What do you mean you didn’t know where we stood? You didn’t know how I felt about you?” He asks almost disbelieving. Roger grabs a hold of her arm. “Excuse us for a few minutes Quinlee. Let’s go outside Bri.” 

A shake my head slightly at their antics. They could be so dramatic at times. I notice Lizzie standing behind me and let her know I’m going to track down more information on how to book passage to Crosscreek.


	7. Chapter 7

ERIK NORTHMAN

Travelling with the Frasers was far more entertaining than traveling alone to Willmington. Governor Tryon had summoned both the Frasers and the Northmans to attend an evening with him at the theater. My neighbors invited me to travel with them. Jamie and I got along well and had developed a fast kinship despite him having just moved to the ridge several months ago. I went over to their property from time to time to help them build their cabin and he came over to my estate to help me with my new fence. His wife, Claire the healer, had already stitched me up on several occasions. She saved my friend John Quincy from the Tskili Yonah when he was almost clawed to death. I owed the Frasers ten times over for that. The Tskili Yonah was a threat not only to us but to the Cherokee as well. My best friend black wolf had been the one to banish the Tskili for forcing himself on his wife last year. Jamie gained the name bear killer after he presented the body to the Cherokee. 

I point out various local plants and herbs to Claire as we make our way across the Carolina countryside. I never tire of the view here, the rolling mountains. Father used to always say that the hills reminded him of Sweden. I barely remember my homeland, I was just a babe when we came to America. Raised in the Carolina backwoods with the trappers and the Cherokee. Jamie kept on after me about finding a wife when we were in Wilmington. Saying it wasn’t proper for a young man recently turned thirty to still be unwed. I didn’t acknowledge the man whenever he brought it up. My large house might be empty and lonely but I have grown accustomed to it. There are not many women in this world who would agree to living in the backcountry with a man who looked like a beast and wasn’t one for town and society. The few Cherokee women I had been with over the years would never marry a white man, they only ever came in the night and always left by sunrise. 

Feeling a sense of dread and irritation as we check into a local inn for the evening and I have to change into my ostentatious waistcoat. I hate wearing the damn thing, makes me look like a dandy. Glancing in the mirror I want to break the thing for the reflection I see in it. My marred face stares back at me. The four long angry red scars mock me. They run across my forehead, my cheek, my neck...pull at the corner of my mouth giving it a constantly twisted appearance. I turn away angrily from the mirror and go downstairs. 

Claire has to suppress a laugh when she sees me. “I’m sorry, I do not mean to laugh at you, it’s just - you look so uncomfortable in that Erik.” 

I yank at my necktie in irritation. “That’s because it is uncomfortable. The only reason I’m doing this is to stay in Governor Tryon’s good graces. He was always fond of my father and has extended that fondness to me since his passing.” 

“Aye, as he should. You’re a good lad who tends his lands well.” Jamie reassures me. I’d be remiss if I didn’t say that at least part of the reason I got on so well with the Scotsman was because he reminded me of my late father. I missed the man, more than I would ever let on to anyone. It was always the two of us against the world, and now I was left alone. 

We share a carriage ride to the theater. Claire actually smacks my hand when I start fidgeting with my necktie again. The two of them enter the foyer gracefully. Claire practically floats around the room in her white dress. The picture of a fine lady if I ever saw one. She is a woman of dichotomies. I feel awkward and lumbering as Jamie and I go to speak with Governor Tryon and his colleague Mr. Edmund Fanning. The scotsman and I are all a good head taller than everyone else here, well everyone besides Colonel Washington. The Colonel gives me a hard pat on the back when he sees me. It’s been a few years since I last saw him. I fought under the man during the French Indian war when I was a young boy. 

“Mr. Northman! So good to see you again. I was sorry to hear of your father’s passing last winter. He was a great man. He will be sorely missed.” The Colonel offers. 

“I thank you for the condolences. It’s good to see you again Colonel.” 

The bell rings for the play to start and we all take our seats. Washington and his wife Mary insist I sit next to them. We make crude jokes at the expense of the terrible actors. I came all the way to Wilmington for this shite. Governor Tryon better be appeased after this. Suddenly Mr. Fanning cries out in pain and falls to the ground. The play comes to a halt. 

“Colonel! Erik! Please help me.” Jamie yells out. Washington and I help pull the man to his feet as Governor Tryon screams out for a surgeon. Claire rushes forward and tells him she can help, the governor seems skeptical at first but seeing as the man is out of options he agrees. Claire tells me to carry the man out into the lobby and lie him flat on his back. I do as she says and hold down the man's arm as she knocks him out with enough rum to foul a mule. She tells the governor to keep his friend calm as she operates. Claire slices the man open like she’s done it a thousand times before and gently pushing his intestines back inside before stitching him back up again. The entire thing is over in a matter of minutes. The audience gives her a round of applause. By far this was the most entertaining part of the evening. 

The next morning I rise early to meet with the bank. I don’t come to town often so I must make the most out of every opportunity. Just as I’m leaving the building feeling satisfied with my affairs I hear a commotion stirring down the street. Curious and weary I go to investigate. A group of rowdy young Scotsmen are flinging insults at some redcoats. Those idiots are going to get themselves killed. Before clearer heads can prevail someone throws a punch then all hell breaks loose. One of the Scotsmen tries to kick me in the bullocks, all it takes is one good right hook to lay the man flat. I make my way down an alleyway to get away from all of the rioters when I hear a girl cry out for help. I turn the corner quickly and find a young woman pinned up against the building by two foul lecherous men. One of them grabs at her skirts and starts rucking them up. She kicks out as hard as she can and scratches at the man like a feral cat. He backhands her across the face hard and she yelps. “You ever been fucked little girl?” The man snarls at her with a predatory grin. She looks back at him in pure terror. Her small frame shaking. I don’t even think about it, more of a reflex than anything, I grab the back of the man’s coat and yank him off her before smashing his face into the wall. The man falls to the ground unconscious. The other assailant stares at me for a moment before fleeing. 

The young woman looks up at me frightened. Like a deer ready to bolt at any moment. Her small hands clutching at the ripped fabric around her neck. I can see the red mark already beginning to form on her fair cheek. Her rather ample chest rising and falling in quick stuttering breaths. She’s a bonnie lass as the Scots would say, which I’m assuming she is given her plaid woolen skirt. I hold up my hands in a placating gesture. “No need to be scared of me. It’s alright, it’s gonna be alright.” The girl’s breaths only come quicker as I take a step forward. Her wide gray eyes become larger. Then those beautiful eyes roll into the back of her head and I see her swaying. Damn it she’s gonna faint. I catch her right before she falls. 

What the hell am I supposed to do with a passed out lady? I can’t just leave her here. Not with the entire city breaking out into a large brawl. I tuck one of her dark red curls behind her ear. She’s just trouble waiting to happen. Sweeping the young woman into my arms I make my way out of the alley and do my best to avoid the scuffles as I wind through the city streets back to the inn. The innkeeper tells me my travelling companions have already left. He gives me an odd look at the unconscious woman in my arms. “It’s - it’s my wife. Had a few too many glasses of wine at a friend's home this afternoon.” I lie to him. Easier to tell him that than to say it’s a girl I just rescued from a savage who I otherwise have no relation to. Fewer questions that way. 

I deposit the girl on the bed in my room. Staring at her for a few moments longer than what’s considered appropriate before packing things away for my journey to Crosscreek. I have business to tend to in Riverrun with Mistress Cameron and a few of the other landowners. It is not until late in the evening when the young woman begins to stir. She bolts up quickly in the bed and looks about the room wildly. I rush over to her. “Shh, shh, calm yourself my lady. You're safe here I promise.” 

She clutches at the small charm around her neck. “Thank you, thank you for rescuing me Mr...I’m sorry I don’t know your name.” 

“Oh pardon my lady. The name is Erik, Erik Northman.” 

She stares at me as if she’s seeing a ghost. “Northman...you’re Erik Northman.” 

I give her another once over. There is something - I don’t know - something familiar about her. “I apologize, have we met before?” 

“No, no I don’t believe we have. I’m sorry you just reminded me of someone is all. My name is Quinlee Fraser.” She introduces herself holding out a hand. Now it is my turn to stop and stare at the girl. Quinlee Fraser, she’s one of Jamie’s daughters. He told me once that he had twin girls but due to circumstances in Scotland before they were even born Claire had to flee to Boston where she remarried and they were raised by another man. The resemblance is obvious. I don’t know why I didn’t see it before. The dark red hair, the deep gray eyes, the heart shaped face just like Claire’s. 

“Fraser you said? You wouldn’t happen to be the daughter of James and Claire Fraser?” 

She looks at me surprised. “Yes, yes I would. Do you know my parents?” 

“I do. Quite well actually. They are my neighbors up near Mount Helion.”

“Oh, oh I see...do you know where they are? My sister and I are trying to find them.” 

I can’t quite meet her hopeful expression. “I - I am afraid they just left Wilmington earlier this morning. Back to Fraser’s ridge.” 

“They were here? Damn it! I was so close, damn it!” She curses while rubbing her temple. 

“Do not worry so Miss Fraser. I can take you to them. We’ll have to make a stop at your Auntie Jocasta’s estate first as I have some business to tend to but I promise I will escort you to the ridge right after that. You will see them soon enough.” 

The girl wrings her hands together anyways. “Alright, alright...we have to find my sister first though. We’re staying at the Willows Creek Inn. I am sure she is worried sick.” 

“Aye I’m sure she is. We’ll find her first thing in the morning then.” I tell her. 

“What? In the morning? Can we not go to Willows Creek now to find her?” 

I raise an eyebrow at her. “Certainly not. I’m not taking you out there right now. The city is practically on fire with riots. The regulators are stirring up trouble again. It will be some time before the soldiers can subdue them.” 

“Well if that’s true then I must go out there! My sister could be in trouble. She was already...I just - I need to find her.” Quinlee proclaims before trying to pull herself out of bed. The girl almost falls over, I have to grab her around the waist to stop her from hitting the floor. “You’re not going anywhere tonight.” I growl at the obstinate girl before helping her into the chair at the small table to eat the dinner the maid brought up over an hour ago. 

That stubborn gleam is still in her eye as she gazes up at me. A gleam that says she just might be crazy enough to try and go out there anyways. I sigh before reaching to pull on my coat. “Damn it! You sit, eat, do not under any circumstances leave this room you hear me?” 

Her eyebrows crinkle together in confusion. “Where are you going?” 

“To find your sister.”


	8. Chapter 8

QUINLEE

Erik came back later that evening and told me he found the innkeeper but they told him my sister had checked out already. Maybe her and Lizzie had to leave because of the riots? I can’t believe she would have just left without me. Maybe she thought I had already caught the boat up to Crosscreek? If we hurry I might catch her at Riverrun before they leave for the ridge. 

A maid helps me into a night shift while Erik waits outside the room for me to get under the covers. He comes back in as the maid leaves and changes behind the screen before getting settled on the makeshift bed on the floor. 

“Are you sure I can’t sleep on the floor instead? I don’t feel right taking your bed from you.” I implore the man again. 

He gives me a withering glare. “I’m not going to let a lady sleep on the floor. It’s not principled. Besides you just suffered a terrible spell, you need the rest more than me.” 

I let out a huff but stop pressing the matter. The man obviously will not yield. 

We awaken early the next morning. The maid comes back in and helps me get dressed into my gray plaid skirt and brown woolen overshirt while Erik goes downstairs and fetches us breakfast. She brushes out my hair and braids it back for me into a neat bun, although several errant auburn curls escape as they always do. 

I take Erik’s arm as we make our way to the Sally Ann. I don’t have much with me besides my cloak and the contents of my purse. Brianna took everything with her when she left. Erik appears to be a light packer as well. Only a single trunk with him. Captain Freeman greets us with a kind smile. “Mr. Northman, glad to see ye again. Who’s the lass?” 

“She’s Mr. Fraser’s daughter. I’m providing her escort up to the ridge.” 

He gives me a once over. “Aye, she certainly is, isn't she? You don’t see red hair like that everyday now do ye?” 

It’s quiet, peaceful, along the river as we make our way up it. Erik joins me on the back of the boat everyday. That first day in the alley when I saw him he frightened me. The man is a giant with a thick layer of muscle underneath his overcoat. A large scar that looks as if it was made by the claws of some wild animal covers the entire right side of his face. It wasn’t so much his appearance that scared me when we first met, it was the look in his eye when he grabbed that man and smashed his face into the wall. His blue eyes were filled with thunderous rage. For a moment I remember thinking he might rip the man apart. But now...now when he looks at me those blue eyes are filled with a soft kindness, so contradictory to the rest of his rough exterior. 

I must ask him a hundred questions about Jamie. I drink in every last word he tells me. Desperate to know more about my father. To know more about the man who in another life could have been my papa. Would he love me, be proud of me in a way that Frank never was?

“You truly never met the man?” Erik asks almost disbelieving. 

I nod my head. “Truly. My mother had to leave after the battle of culloden. She thought Jamie was dead. Came to Boston and married the man who raised me and Brianna as his own. She didn’t tell us the truth about - about Jamie until after our papa died.”

“Why did she return to Scotland then?” 

I let out a sigh trying to think of how to word this in a way he will understand without having to mention time travel. “My mother thought Jamie was dead for many, many years. She went to Scotland once we were grown to pay her respects only to find - find that her husband was still alive. Working as a printer in Edinburgh. My sister and I were...waiting to receive word that she was safely settled but we never did. We, well, we worried. Went searching for her and ended up here.” I finished my semi-tall tale. 

He gives me a skeptical look but doesn’t press for more details about me and Brianna’s misadventures. By the afternoon on the tenth day of our travels we round the bend of the slow churning river and reach a massive brick estate. It’s - it’s stunning. I gathered the woman was well off but I didn’t realize just how much. Captain Freeman angles the boat next to the dock and Erik helps me down. It feels like a pit sits in the bottom of my stomach as a slave comes out to greet us. It seems so obvious coming from the future that slavery is wrong...how can those living in this time not see it as well? Maybe they do but they choose to ignore it. He introduces himself as Ulysses and shows us inside the regal mansion. The inside is just as beautiful as the outside. All wood floors and ornate wooden columns with rich colored rugs and curtains. I notice a grand piano in one of the rooms off the foyer. I haven’t played since we left Boston. “May I ask who your companion is Mr. Northman?” Ulysses inquires politely. 

“This is Mr. Jamie Fraser’s daughter Quinlee.” Erik says with a warm smile, his hand still placed on my lower back. 

Ulysses eyes me obviously skeptical of the relation. “I - I have a letter from my uncle Ian in Lallybroch.” I hand the sealed letter over to him. He looks at the seal and seems to recognize it immediately. “I see. One moment while I inform my mistress.” 

A minute later a regal elderly woman in a large ruffle lace dress comes out of a back room, hanging onto Ulysses arm. It takes a few moments for me to realize that her sight is gone as her eyes dart about the room in an odd manner not focusing on anything in particular. “Mr. Northman! How grand it is to see you again. Ulysses here tells me that you have brought a special guest with you.”

“Yes, yes I have mistress Cameron. Allow me to introduce you to Quinlee Fraser...your grand-niece.” Erik pushes me forwards slightly. 

My great aunt holds out her hands for me to take. I place my hands in hers. She gives them a gentle squeeze. “It is such a joy to meet you Quinlee. My, you have such soft hands. I am afraid my sight has left me quite some time ago…” 

“It is a pleasure to meet you as well mistress Jocasta. You have a magnificent home here. I promise not to be of any bother. I am simply trying to find my sister and parents.” I tell her before giving a small curtsy. 

Jocasta scoffs before giving me a warm smile. “Oh sweet girl, you are no bother at all. You are my kin. You will stay as long as you need. However, I must insist you call me auntie.” 

“That is very kind and gracious of you...auntie. Have you seen my sister Brianna? She left ahead of me and I thought she might have come here.”

She shakes her head. “I’m afraid not. The only Fraser’s I have seen have been your parents, but that was over a year ago.” 

“Oh I see. I thought, or at least I hoped she would be here.” I say anxiously. Where on earth could she be? Did she and Roger really up and leave me? What did they do, go back to the stones and just hope I would figure it out or something? Maybe she found mama and Jamie in Wilmington and left with them for Fraser’s ridge. That seemed the more likely scenario given Lizzie was gone as well, although why would they leave without me? This is so like Brianna, disappearing into the wind without a word, not telling me where she is going or what she is doing. 

“Do not fret, child. We will get you to the ridge soon enough. I am sure your sister is already there.” She says before cupping my cheek in her hand. I hiss when she brushes her thumb over my bruised cheekbone. 

“Are you hurt? What happened to my niece?” She asks sternly, turning her head towards where Erik is. 

“There was, was an incident in Wilmington. These two men had me cornered in an alley when one of them struck me. Erik found me and fended them off.” I rush to explain. 

“It seems I am in your debt Mr. Northman for looking after my niece so. Come along, let's get you both settled before dinner.” Aunt Jocasta proclaims before leading us up the grand staircase with another servant who introduces herself as Pheadra. 

Jocasta shows me into a beautiful bedroom with blue wallpaper and purple velvet bedding. “Pheadra, describe the child to me. We need to find her a suitable dress.” 

The servant walks around slowly assessing me. “Aye, she’s a right bonnie lass. Fair skin like ivory, paler than her mother’s even, and dark auburn curls. She has fine large gray eyes that are like the sky just before a storm. Full pink lips and the bosom of a siren to boot.” 

Jocasta has a pleased smug smile on her face. “I figured she would be a great beauty. Ian wrote that she has a strong likeness to my dear sister Ellen. I am pleased to hear that is true. Pheadra, would you pull out the gray blue dress? The one with the dark pink bows on it?” 

After giving me a proper bath Jocasta dresses me up like a doll. Fussing over me and asking Pheadra to keep trying various pieces of jewelry on me. She fixes my hair in an updo and insists that Pheadra weave a few of the small flowers from the window sill into my curls. We come to a dilemma at the shoes when Jocasta realizes that I have braces on my legs. She gives me a kind smile and tells me not to worry. After what seems like an eternity the woman finally deems me appropriate and releases me. We go back down to the dining room. Erik is already there waiting for us.


	9. Chapter 9

ERIK

Lord give me strength. I knew she was a pretty girl, but dressed up like a grand lady she is something else. Like a creature from one of those norse myths my father used to read. I stand up when she enters the room and almost knock my chair over. She gives me a shy smile as I pull her chair out. The smell of lavender drifts past me as she takes her seat. 

“You look - look beautiful tonight.” I manage to stutter out. 

Her pale cheeks turn a bright strawberry pink. Far too delectable for her own good. “Thank you Erik. You look quite handsome yourself.” 

Jocasta clears her throat to gain our attention. “Mr. Northman, how do your lands fair? I have heard from many folks in the backcountry that they have been quite prosperous this year.” 

“Yes I have had good fortune as of late. The crop yield was quite high this season.” I inform her.

She gives me a congenial smile. “I am glad to hear it...I recall your father telling me of your home in the mountains. It is dark blue is it not?” 

I nod my head. “It is yes. My father built it himself when I was but a young boy.” 

“It is a rather large home if I am not mistaken?” Jocasta inquires. 

“Large enough I suppose. Four bedrooms in all. Father frequently had visitors.” 

“Hmm, must be lonely in that large house all by yourself.” Jocasta comments while taking a sip of her soup. 

I feel a hollow pang run through me. “At times it can be I suppose. I have grown used to being alone though. Besides if you truly seek it there is friendship to be found in the backwoods.” 

She tells us she will be hosting a dinner party with all of the local gentry of Crosscreek in two weeks time and we must stay until at least then. Jocasta insists that I enjoy my time at Riverrun while I am here and we can discuss our trade deals while she prepares for her upcoming event. After dinner is finished we go into the parlor for a glass of port. Quinlee eyes the piano longingly. Jocasta must hear the pause in her steps. “Do you play child?” 

“Oh, just a little. Only for my own amusement.” Quinlee tells us while fiddling with her glass. 

“Then you must play something for us. It has been far too long since anyone played that piano.” Jocasta insists. 

That breathtaking flush returns to Quinlee’s cheeks. “Oh no, really, I’m not that proficient and I haven’t played since Boston.” 

Her aunt waves her off. “Nonsense child. Play whatever your heart desires. Music comes from the soul. If you do not play I will be sorely affronted.” 

Quinlee swishes her skirts back and forth for a few moments before hesitantly taking a seat on the bench. Her thin delicate fingers stretch across the keys. She looks at the piano in a contemplative manner before beginning a slow song the likes of which I had never heard before.


	10. Chapter 10

QUINLEE

After thinking back on the repertoire of classical songs Mrs. Willis had hoisted upon me since I was a toddler the one I figure I recall best without sheet music is Clair de Lune by Debussy. Of course Debussy isn’t even alive yet but it’s the best I can do on short notice. As I begin the slow melancholy melody I close my eyes. For a moment I almost feel as if I am sitting back at my piano in Boston. Alone in that large house, just myself and the piano. I always felt a strange sort of sorrow when I played this song. Letting myself get swept away with the feeling. 

As the song comes to it’s close there is a long moment of silence before Jocasta and Erik begin clapping. I glance up at my aunt and can’t help but feel my heart swell as she is grinning madly at me with pride and enthusiasm. Mama was the only one who ever looked at me like that. My cheeks must be ten shades of red by now. 

“That was beautiful my dear, hauntingly so. Where on earth did you learn such a song?” Jocasta asks. 

I smile down at the magnificent piano. It was almost a work of art in and of itself. “Thank you auntie, it was a song my piano teacher taught me when I was much younger. It’s a french composer...rather obscure.” I only partially lie, Debussy will be a french composer but he certainly won’t be an obscure one. 

“French you say? How very cultured of you. I would not have guessed your mother would have had you so well tutored. You are quite the accomplished young lady.” Jocasta compliments me while insulting my mother. Clever woman.

“My mother always cared very dearly about my education.” 

“Hmm, it would seem so...well, you must play for us at my party then. That song was absolutely lovely. You are a divine pianist.” My aunt insists.

“That is kind of you to say. If you think your guests would enjoy the entertainment I would be happy to oblige. It’s the least I could do.” 

Jocasta smiles at me. “Wonderful, just wonderful...and what of you Mr. Northman? What did you think of my niece’s playing?” 

“I don’t think I’ve heard anything so mysteriously beautiful in my life. You are an exceptional pianist Quinlee. Truly.” Erik tells me in a genuine manner. I can’t quite meet his intense icy blue eyed gaze. 

“That’s very generous of you.” I mumble shyly. 

The next morning as we are having breakfast my aunt asks if I know how to ride a horse. I have to admit that I have never ridden before. With my braces mama and papa were always hesitant to let me try certain activities such as horseback riding, swimming, skiing. Erik offers to teach me the basics of how to ride. 

He lends me his arm and escorts me to the stables. The towering horses give me pause. I don’t know if this is such a good idea. Mama was always so cautious with me, always expected me to be cautious, what would she say now? 

Erik's tall frame leans over me. “There is nothing to fear Quinlee. I’m not getting to let anything happen to you. Trust me.” 

I nod hesitantly. When he helps me onto a short black horse with white spots I let out an embarrassing little squeak. Erik can’t hide his laughter at what I’m sure is my terrified expression. I narrow my gaze on the absurdly large norseman. “You won’t be laughing when I fall, break my neck, then my ghost comes back to haunt you purely out of spite.” 

He rolls his eyes at me. “I’m not gonna let you fall. In fact you’re not even going to be in control of the reins.” 

Erik takes the reins in his hands and makes a high pitched clicking sound and the horse lurches forwards. I grab onto the mount so hard my knuckles are white. He leads us out of the stables and onto the lawn by the river. Erik walks along besides me holding the reins all the while. The sun is high in the sky despite there being a cold breeze in the air. I suppose it’s a good thing Aunt Jocasta wouldn’t let me leave the house without putting a large brimmed hat on first. To protect my fair skin she said. I glance up at the house and see her sitting on the front porch with Ulysses as he whispers in her ear. Whether or not they are whispering about us I do not know. 

We go slow and steady along the riverbank. I begin to relax more into the saddle. “This isn’t nearly as nerve wracking as I made it out to be.” I mutter. 

Erik smiles up at me. Likely one of the few instances I will ever be taller than the giant man. “You are an odd creature lady Fraser.” 

I have the overwhelming urge to stick my tongue out at him like a five year old. “How so?” 

“The first night I met you, you practically collapsed on the floor trying to find your sister yet there wasn’t a hint of fear in your eyes. You didn’t even hesitate trying to fling yourself out bed. Yet when we try to get you on top of a horse you tremble in terror.” He remarks with a hint of amusement in his tone. 

I shrug at him. “That was different, it was Brianna, what else was I going to do?” 

“You love her dearly don’t you?” He questions but it’s really more of a statement.

I twirl the hair of the horse’s mane around my finger. “Yes I do. It’s not a bad thing to want to protect the ones you love.” 

“No, no it isn’t.” He confesses almost in a whisper. 

We continue along the river for a few more minutes until I hear aunt Jocasta calling out for us. Erik leads the horse and I up to the front porch. “I think that is quite enough for one day Quinlee. You have had a long journey and need your rest. The two of you young folk come and join me on the porch and sit for a spell while we have some tea.” 

Erik wraps his large hands around my waist and helps me off the horse. I stumble for a moment but he keeps me upright easily enough. We join Jocasta on the porch. She tells a servant to fetch me a shawl which I wrap around my shoulders gratefully. 

“Now my dear, tell me what other pursuits you enjoy. I wish to know everything there is to know about my kin.” 

It is a relaxing afternoon sitting on the porch talking about various things from music and poetry to philosophy and economics. I tell her that I was...trained...in bookkeeping while in Boston. She asks me if I would mind reviewing her ledgers with her later this afternoon. I happily oblige the request. I have not had reason to use my accounting skills in some time. It is easy enough to figure out the system she has in place with her books and we get through the work in quick time. I feel useful being able to assist her in such a way. Maybe I can put my knowledge to use in this time after all, like mama does. 

We have another companionable dinner and retire to the parlor afterwards. It is Erik this time who requests I play them another song. Feeling nostalgic I play waltz of the flowers by Tchaikovsky. After performing the piece for our high school ballet four years in a row I could never forget it. A more upbeat song compared to last night. I really should learn more pieces from the 1700’s otherwise people will begin to think me strange. 

Jocasta and Erik give another round of applause. I’ve always considered myself to be just a fair player but Jocasta insists I have a natural talent for it. As I’m getting ready for bed that evening my aunt stops by my room. She asks me to read Julie; or the new Heloise by the french author Rousseau to her. I pick up the book and can’t help but smile a little. I recall discussing it in one of my english classes at Harvard. I suppose it is not a great work of literature yet, it was only published a few years ago at this point. We stay up far too late reading the gripping epistolary novel. Jocasta seems enthralled by the story and compliments me on having a high smooth reading voice. 

The next morning Erik offers to take me riding again. Just as I’m about to hop up from the table Jocasta gives me a stern warning. “Be sure to wear your sunhat again and do not remain outside for too long. I do not want you to tire yourself so dearie.” 

This time Erik takes another horse for himself although he continues to hold my reins for me as we walk along the river's edge. “Tell me what is the ridge like?” I ask him. 

A fond smile graces his face. “It’s a glorious sight to behold. Your father picked a fine place to settle. The ridge overlooks the Yadkin river. You can see out for miles. Rolling hills abound. The lands are good and fertile around Mount Helion. That is why my own father chose to live there many years ago...he used to say the hills sung to him and reminded him of Sweden.” 

“You almost look like you are in love with the land.” I say jokingly. 

Erik lets out a hearty laugh. “Maybe I am. It is an easy land to love. I am sure you will come to love it in time.” 

The painting from the festival flashes through my mind. It feels like my heart has dropped into my stomach. I glance over at the massive blonde norseman. “Yes I suppose I will.”


	11. Chapter 11

ERIK

Watching her is like watching the night sky - never endingly captivating. She has a way about her that draws you in, that lightens a heavy soul and eases a hard man’s burdens. Anytime I can find an excuse to be near her I take it. Maybe she is a mythical being of old. She is so unlike any woman I have ever met before. Warm and gracious and unfailingly kind while at the same time learned beyond measure and enduring and unassuming in nature. With a beauty that deserves the world to be laid at her feet. 

I trail after her like a lost puppy although I don’t know how much she notices. She may be smart and methodical but there is still a naivety about the girl. It makes me feel a little bit like a letch, not that it stops me from following after her anyways. I stand outside the room just out of view as she practices her songs for the upcoming dinner party. The way she plays pierces the heart and sends a chill down the spine.

That evening I prepare for Mistress Cameron’s formal affair, fiddling with the damn necktie again. I feel like a damn fool in this dress suit. Going downstairs I see many of the guests for the evening have already arrived. Several of them I recognize, such as Gerald Forbes the obnoxious lawyer. The pompous man flits about the room like a hummingbird. He greets me enthusiastically before thankfully moving on to annoy someone else. I spot Lieutenant Wolff roaming about the room as well. He always had a slick snake like quality to him. I hear an uptick in the murmuring about the room and turn around only to stand frozen in place. Quinlee descends the staircase in a pink dress. She is the sweetest sight I have ever beheld. Her cheeks flush as the entire room seems to still and look up at the lovely girl. Her shy gaze remains on the floor. My legs seem to have a mind of their own as they make their way to her. I hold out my large hand. Those storm filled eyes look to me. She places her small soft hand in mine and I help her down the last few steps. 

“Erik Northman if you let go of my hand I will throttle you.” She hisses under her breath. 

A deep seated possessiveness washes over me as I notice several pairs of eyes leer after the girl. Slowly gazing up and down her fine figure. My grip on her hand tightens. “An easy request to oblige I assure you.” 

Her aunt Jocasta taps her glass with a knife to gain everyone’s attention. “Good evening all. I would like to introduce you to my great niece Ms. Quinlee Fraser.” 

Quinlee shifts closer to me as all eyes turn towards her. She gives a small curtsy to the room. Jocasta insists that Quinlee take her arm instead so as she can be led about the room properly without having to rely on Ulysses. I reluctantly let go of her hand. Just as John Rouleaux pulls me off to the side to discuss wheat crop, Lieutenant Wolff makes his move and slithers through the crowd to greet Riverrun’s newest guest.


	12. Chapter 12

QUINLEE

The rather short and rotund man approaches Jocasta and I. Extending my hand expecting the man to shake it, instead he takes it and kisses the back of it for what is far longer than considered appropriate. I practically dislocate my shoulder while yanking my hand out of his to get him to stop.

My aunt smiles at the man politely. “I am so glad you were able to join us tonight Lieutenant Wolff. Quinlee, this here is the man who is the steward of the naval stores contract that Riverrun has with the Royal Navy.” 

“Pleasure to make your acquaintance lieutenant.” I say while giving a slight bow of my head. 

“Oh I assure you the pleasure is all mine my lady.” 

“Lieutenant, if I am not mistaken you recently purchased a new estate did you not? I have heard it is a grand home with a fine parcel of land.” Aunt Jocasta proclaims. 

“Indeed I have Mistress Cameron. A rather large home with plenty of room for a family should god be so gracious as to bestow a wife upon me.” He says while looking directly at me. What on earth is that supposed to mean?

“Hmm, yes, well bairns certainly are a blessing. If you would not mind my niece and I must excuse ourselves to attend to our other guests. We shall speak later lieutenant.” My auntie declares before pulling us further into the crowd. She whispers into my ear if I see an older white haired matronly woman with a stern expression standing next to a tall man. I spot the pair she is describing and lead us to them.

Aunt Jocasta puts on a pleasant smile. “Judge Alderdyce, what a thrill it is to have you with us here tonight. You are always such a busy man what with all of the trouble those regulators have been stirring up recently.” 

“It is a pleasure to be in your company tonight Mistress Cameron. I would never miss an opportunity to indulge in one of your exquisite dinners. Please do not trouble yourself worrying about these so called regulators, Governor Tryon and his forces are dealing with them appropriately.” Judge Alderdyce reassures us. 

“Well I am so grateful there are gentlemen in our corner of the world such as yourself to deal with these troublesome matters. Did you know my niece was set upon by two of those regulators in Wilmington? If it wasn’t for Mr. Northman rescuing her I do not know what would have happened. Savages the lot of them.” My auntie proclaims vehemently. 

“Good heavens! I am so sorry for your troubles dear girl. We have heard many such disturbing reports of uncouth behavior. I can promise you we are doing everything in our power to bring these ruffians to justice.” The judge tells us.

A few minutes later Jocasta excuses us from the judge’s company and asks me to lead her into the dining room. Unfortunately our path is blocked by a short man with a pointed weasley nose. “Mistress Cameron, I wanted to thank you for inviting me here tonight. It is always such an honor to attend one of your lavish events.” The man greets us while giving a small bow. 

“Oh of course Mr. Forbes. We are happy to have you with us tonight. Quinlee, this is my lawyer Mr. Gerald Forbes. He has quite the extensive practice in Wilmington with many illustrious clients.” My aunt explains while introducing us. 

I give Mr. Forbes a curtsy instead of offering my hand. I learned my lesson the first time around with the lieutenant. “May I pay you a compliment Miss Fraser and say how radiant you look this evening. A vision to behold.” His gaze travels up and down my body causing a rather disgusted shiver to run up my spine. 

Thankfully Jocasta comes to my rescue. “If you will excuse us Mr. Forbes it is time for us to make our way into the dining room.” 

I feel a sense of relief when I realize I will be seated between my aunt and Erik. Unfortunately the lieutenant is directly across the table. I do not care for the way he looks at me, almost like I’m some trinket. After a few moments the lieutenant averts his eyes in a frightened manner. I glance over at Erik and realize he is staring the man down with a thunderous expression. I have to cover my mouth to stop the smile from showing. 

Dinner is loud with so many guests around Jocasta’s long table. Luckily Erik and I are able to talk amongst ourselves while my aunt entertains her other guests. It is a sumptuous four course meal. Jocasta certainly knows how to throw a dinner party. After we finish our dessert the entire group retires to the parlor where I am expected to perform. Feeling a slight uptick in nerves I force myself to take a deep steadying breath before placing my fingers on the keys. A hush follows over the room as the guests all settle in. I start off by playing Vivaldi’s Spring piece from his four seasons series. I figure it’s upbeat and some may know of it. I play Mozart’s piano concerto no. 21 next, hopefully a familiar piece to a few as well, before finishing with Claire de Lune again per my aunt’s request. 

The room erupts into applause after each song. I can overhear my aunt telling the others in attendance that I am a very accomplished young lady. I can’t help but smile at her praise. 

Mr. Forbes and Lieutenant Wollf immediately come up to me upon the completion of my performance. “You are a lovely pianist Miss Fraser.” Mr. Forbes says before being cut off by the lieutenant. “Marvelous performance, you are exceptionally talented and dare I say you look exceptionally beautiful playing the piano forte.” 

My cheeks must be red hot by this point. “It’s very kind of you both to pay such compliments.” Thankfully Erik intercedes and offers me his hand to help me up from the piano bench which I take gratefully. I feign weariness and luckily Erik catches the hint and offers to take me outside for some air. He doesn’t let go of my hand once we are on the porch. I can’t stop myself from feeling giddy over the performance. It has been so long since I played for others. 

“You really do have a gift you know. Not many people can play the way you do.” Erik tells me with a genuineness to his voice. 

I look up into his playful gaze. “Flattery will get you absolutely nowhere Mr. Northman.” 

“Oh so we are back to Mr. Northman now are we?” He says with a charming smile. 

“But of course! What sort of lady would I be if I used your first name at a formal affair.” I jape putting a hand over my chest and pretending to be aghast. 

“A very untoward lady I suppose.” He mocks back. I lightly smack his broad chest with my free hand. “My lady you wound me so!” 

“Serves you right.”

I hear someone clear their throat behind us. Turning around I see Ulysses. “Your aunt requests your presence back in the sitting room Ms. Fraser.” 

I let out a sigh. “Duty calls.” 

The next morning I am able to sneak away with Erik to go on our morning ride and skip having to make awkward small talk with the guests who stayed the night at Riverrun. He helps me onto the same black and white horse I have been riding every morning called Chief. With the cumbersome dresses aunt Jocasta insists I wear I have to ride side saddle but it’s not quite as difficult as I originally thought it would be. 

“So...what did you think of your aunt’s guests?” Erik inquires. 

I shrug. “Everyone seemed polite. Honestly I tried to avoid talking to any one person for too long. I’m not particularly gifted at making small talk.” 

“Hmm, I noticed Mr. Forbes and Lieutenant Wolff seemed to pay particular attention towards you.” He comments with a hint of animosity in his tone. 

“I mean, yes I suppose they did. I didn’t really think that much of it to be honest. Figured they were just trying to get in my aunt’s good graces.” 

Erik lets out a snort. “Yeah, sure, that’s what they were doing.” 

I furrow my eyebrows in confusion at him. “Is something wrong?” 

His jaw gnashes together. “No - no nothing’s wrong. Just...long night is all.”


	13. Chapter 13

ERIK

What the hell is wrong with me? I have never considered myself to be a jealous man but every time one of Jocasta’s single male guests smiles at Quinlee I want to break their nose. The way they look at her, leer after her...it makes me want to take her into the mountains and never let another man look upon her again. The possessive beast that has taken up residence within me wants to selfishly hoard her away from the world. I want every one of her warm smiles and soft melodic laughs. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted a woman the way I want her. It’s stupid and irrational is what it is. She’s radiant, the most beautiful girl I’ve met...she’s a fine lady and fine ladies belong in places like Riverrun not in the backwoods with a scarred beast of a man.

Thankfully when we arrive back at the house Jocasta is in the process of seeing her guests off. We have just enough time to say a polite goodbye to each of them before they leave. Although Mr. Forbes and Lieutenant Wolff certainly take their sweet time saying their goodbyes to Quinlee. She’s unfailingly polite as always. I’m almost grateful she doesn’t seem to be aware of whatever game her aunt is playing. Quinlee cannot wed one of those cockroaches. The thought of another man pawing after her makes my stomach want to wretch. 

We follow Mistress Cameron inside as the lasts of her guests disembark. “Mr. Northman I believe it is time for you and I to discuss some business. Come with me into my office.” 

I follow along after the mistress of Riverrun while Quinlee goes upstairs into her room. Once Jocasta and I are comfortably settled across from one another Ulysses closes the door behind him leaving us alone. 

She has a conniving smile on her face. “Well I feel as though I must start proceedings by thanking you again for the safe escort of my niece to Riverrun. It has been a true blessing having her here with me these past two weeks. She is as sweet and bonnie as they come is she not?” 

“Yes she is.” I agree hesitantly, trying to determine where this conversation is heading.

Jocasta smiles a little wider. “I’m glad to hear you agree because I find myself in a rather peculiar dilemma. A dilemma that I could use your assistance with.” 

“Hmm, what seems to be the issue?” 

She lets out a weary sigh. “It is only a matter of time before Jamie tracks his daughter down to Riverrun. Whether or not Brianna is with them he will find out about Quinlee one way or another and come for the lass.” 

“Is that not a good thing? Shouldn’t Quinlee be with her father and mother?” 

Jocasta seems to be considering her next words carefully. “Yes and no. Forgive me as what I am about to say is not meant to come off with any offense to my own kin. Quinlee has a tender loving heart and a gentle soul that much is plain as day. She does not have the same fire that drives my nephew or the...opinionated nature of her mother. The girl has endured much in life but irregardless of how much she has overcome she is still fragile. Quinlee needs someone who can take care of her properly, look after her, and I am not certain that her parents are in a position to do so.” 

I narrow my eyes at her skeptically. “I suppose you may have a point...” 

“Well, from my understanding of the backcountry it can be a hard place to live. You need to be strong and able if you are a new settler such as my nephew, correct?” 

“Yes, for the most part that is true but many are able to adapt over time even if they have - have certain limitations.” I try to explain. 

Jocasta scoffs. “Limitations? Quinlee will never be able to walk right, will never be able to outrun some monstrous beast or hunt down food or do hard manual labor like building a house. There are limitations and then there is reality Mr. Northman and the truth of the matter is I worry for her safety if my nephew were to take her to his cabin in the woods. He doesn’t have a grand house, not yet at least, and he certainly doesn’t have any servants to help her. They would expect her to be able to do a certain amount of work would they not? Work she would not be able to do or keep up with. The girl can’t even ride a horse on her own.” 

“What is it exactly that you want my help with?” I ask, suspicious of her intentions. 

“You have a large established prosperous estate in the backwoods Mr. Northman, one that happens to border my nephews. I have known you for many years and known your father even longer. I know that your family has done quite well for themselves and that you employ several servants in your home. Immigrants who according to your late father have always been loyal and served your family well. Simply put, I will not allow that darling girl to leave Riverrun unless she will be going to a home that can appropriately care for her. My nephew can make all the fuss he wants about it but I will not budge on the matter. I will have Judge Alderdyce appoint me as her legal guardian if it comes to it, although I do not wish for such tensions to arise between my nephew and I. Now two gentlemen from last evening have already come to me to ask for her hand…”

The blood in my veins runs cold. “Mr. Forbes and Lieutenant Wolff?” 

She nods. “Yes the very same. I am not inclined to give either of them my blessing to pursue her just yet, not until I had the opportunity to speak with you on the matter first.” 

It dawns on me what she is implying, what it is she wants from me. “You want me to marry Quinlee?” 

“I think that would be the ideal suite for all involved. She would be close to her parents as I am sure they will want...and you will have her which is what I know you truly want. I may be blind Mr. Northman but I can still tell when a man pines for a woman.” 

I swallow the dry hard lump in my throat. “Is it so obvious?” 

Jocasta chuckles lightly. “Aye lad. I’m sorry but it is. You do not have to be so worried. She is naive and innocent like most unwed one and twenty year olds, but I can tell she feels something for you...that she cares about you.” 

That possessive little beast inside me wants this. Wants to take the opportunity to steal the girl away and never let her go. It’s sitting right there, being handed over on a silver platter. I should say no. After everything Jamie has done for me I know it is wrong to marry his daughter behind his back without his permission...but I am not that strong and the offer is far too tempting to turn down. If I’m going to hell for forcing the girl into an arrangement then at least I will be going to hell a happy man. “Then I suppose I must ask you Mistress Cameron, may I have your niece’s hand in marriage?”


	14. Chapter 14

QUINLEE

There is a knock at my bedroom door. “Come in!” I call out while setting down the pillow covering I was working on making. 

Pheadra opens the door for my aunt and they both enter the room. Jocasta takes a seat on the  
settee at the end of my bed. She has a serious expression on her face. “Quinlee there is an important matter I have to discuss with you.” 

“Of course auntie, what is it?” 

“I think it is time we discuss your future lass. Now I would be pleased to continue fostering you here in Riverrun and if that is what you wish it can be easily arranged, but I think like most young ladies you desire a home of your own.” She proclaims. 

“Oh well you know I - I figured I would go to Fraser’s ridge first to see my parents before considering any sort of...domestic arrangements.” I reply carefully. 

“Hmm, I thought you might say something along those lines. Well I suppose that does create a wee bit a problem. You see, three suitors have come to me asking for your hand.” 

I feel my entire body freeze in shock. “I beg your pardon?” 

“Oh I’m sorry lass. I did not mean to spring the news on you so suddenly but we do have some decisions to make.” 

I shift uncomfortably in my seat. “What do you mean? What sort of decisions?” 

“Well we have to give your suitors an answer now don’t we?” 

I stand up and wring my hands together anxiously. “Can’t we just - just tell them I’m not ready?” 

Jocasta smiles softly at me. “You’re one and twenty my dear, you cannot put marriage and children off forever.” 

“Well why can’t I put it off just a little bit longer? At least until I can go to the ridge to live with my parents for a while, get their blessing on any...unions.” I ask fretfully. 

“Now don’t misunderstand me Quinlee. I love your father, he is my kin afterall, but the way in which the man lives is not appropriate for a young lady in your condition.” She states. 

I pause and glance down at my legs. “My condition?” I say sourly. 

Auntie lets out a long sigh. “I do not mean to cause you any more grief child, but you must be honest with yourself. You cannot live in the wilderness as your parents do currently. Little more than a cabin and huts for shelter. I ken how it feels to come to grips with your own limitations. Lord understands that I have had to do so many times over the years.” 

I feel tears begin to prick at my eyes as I sit down next to Jocasta. I look up at the ceiling to try and stop myself from crying but it doesn’t help, a few tears slip out anyways. Auntie reaches out and brushes the tears away gently. “Oh my sweet girl I did not mean to upset you so. I only want you to understand what it is I’m trying to get at. There is no shame in admitting you need help, that you need someone to care for you. You know I only want what’s best for you.” 

I nod shakily. “I - I know you do. It’s just...I want so badly to be with them. I miss my mama so much I’m heartsick over it.” 

Jocasta grips my hand tightly in hers. “I know you miss them. I know, that’s why I thought you would be interested in one proposal in particular...Mr. Northman’s that is. His lands border your father’s. Your family could visit whenever they desire.”

My back goes rigid. Oh god, it’s coming true. The painting at the festival is coming true. 

“I’ll give you some time to mull it over, but let us not keep Mr. Northman waiting too long on an answer. I’ll fetch you for dinner in a few hours.”

The second she leaves I pace the room fretfully. What the hell am I going to do? I can’t just - just marry the norseman and stay in the 1700’s. Become the girl in the painting. I can’t leave my life behind in Boston I’ve got...well honestly I’ve got no one waiting for me back there. The only thing I left behind was a job. Did I really want to go back to that empty house? Be all on my own again? Since I went through the stones I had Brianna with me and now I have Erik and my auntie with me. People to talk to every morning, people who care for me. I think Erik cares for me at least a little bit. He cared enough to rescue me in that alley, to bring me to Riverrun, to take me riding every morning...if that’s not proof he cares then what is? I worry that he might only agree to the arrangement because of my aunt, she is a force to be reckoned with. Who would want to marry a crippled girl?

A few hours later auntie Jocasta comes back upstairs to help me get ready for dinner. I wonder at times if she used to have a daughter that passed. She seems to enjoy trussing me up at every opportunity. Auntie clips my half of the pearl necklace mama left us around my neck. “I’m glad you have your grandmother’s pearls. She used to look so lovely in them. I’m sure you look just as lovely dearie. Have you given any thought about what we are going to tell Mr. Northman tonight?” 

I fiddle with the string of pearls as I glance up at my aunt in the mirror. “I have...I’m going to tell him yes.”


	15. Chapter 15

ERIK

I stand at the bottom of the stairs pacing. Waiting to hear what Quinlee has to say. The voice in the back of my head tells me she is going to say yes just to appease her aunt. I hope that she says yes because she feels something for me. That she’ll lave that tender heart of hers on me. Not be frightened or apprehensive of me because her aunt made her. I scoff internally, what am I thinking? Of course she will be frightened by me. A scarred man? Why wouldn’t she be? She is a lady but I am certainly no gentleman.

They come downstairs and I swear my heart skips a beat when I see Quinlee. I have never wanted someone the way I want her. I don’t just want her body - I want her heart, her mind, her spirit, her very soul. I want everything but all I have to give in return is my own being. The marred blackened soul of a soldier with a marred face to match. Not exactly a fair trade. 

I take her hand as she reaches the last few steps and can’t help myself when I place a lingering kiss on her soft milky skin. She smells like lavender and something sweet I can’t quite put a name too. 

Jocasta clears her throat and it takes me a minute to turn my attention to her. “I think I’ll leave you two be for a moment while I check on dinner.” She says before grabbing a hold of Ulysses arm and leaving us alone. 

“Would you care to join me on the porch?” I ask her. She nods her head seeming to be in a bit of a daze as I lead her outside. 

Keeping a hold of her small delicate hand. I gaze down into her bewitching large gray eyes. “There is a question I need to ask you. I know your aunt has already talked to you about this but before you give me an answer I have to tell you something. I find you to be the most fascinating woman I have ever met. You are so beautiful I don’t even think the word itself does you justice. I - I care about you, a great deal actually. If we were to get married it wouldn’t just be an arrangement for me. I know you might not feel the same right now, I do not expect you to...” 

She looks at me and I swear it is like time and space itself are standing still as her hand reaches up slowly, hesitantly. My eyes close as her soft fingers ever so gently brush against the scars on my face. It feels as if she is touching my soul. I let out a shuddering breath at the sensation. Quinlee retracts her hand and I snap my eyes open at her. “Sorry, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to...I just…” She stutters out. 

I take a hold of her other hand before she can draw it back further. “You don’t ever have to apologize for touching me alskling.” 

Quinlee takes the smallest step closer and slowly brings her hand back up to tenderly brush against my scarred cheek. I hold my breath in anticipation. “Erik, it wouldn’t be an arrangement for me. Not at all.” 

Before I can overthink it, before I can stop myself, I snatch the lovely creature around the waist and yank her towards me until her soft body is flush against mine. I bury my other hand in those thick copper curls. They feel like silk. Tilting her head up her surprised gray eyes lock on to mine. I kiss those pink bow shaped lips, softly at first, then that possessive need rushes through me and I claim them as mine. Pressing hard onto those plush pillowy lips with a desperation the likes of which I have never felt before. I nip at the bottom one, it tastes like honey. She gives a startled yelp. Giving me just enough space to push my tongue into her soft wet mouth, exploring every sweet cravace. The girl lets out a little whimper. 

It takes all of my will power not to press her back against the wall and crush her small frame to mine, not to ravish her mouth and neck and every other piece of milk and honey skin I can find. I force myself to pull back and release her swollen lips. Her breathings ragged as she blinks up at me slowly. It dawns on me what I’ve just done...my god she must think I’m a brute. 

“I - I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to just take you like that.” I stammer out while trying to pull back and let go of her. 

Quinlee’s grip on my vest becomes vice like. The softness in her eyes turns to a hard steel. “You don’t ever have to apologize for touching me.”


	16. Chapter 16

QUINLEE

It is a strange thing getting married without mama or Brianna present. I tried my hardest to get auntie to let us simply be engaged before leaving for the ridge, get married later, but she wouldn’t hear of it. Said it wasn’t proper for us to be travelling alone unless we were wed. Pheadra is putting the finishing touches on my hair as her and auntie prepare me for my wedding day. Jocasta works fast, I'll give her that much. Within five days the field across the river had been set up to host an elegant affair with a tall white archway set up to say our vows under. I don’t know how she got the catholic priest to agree to marry us before the bands were read. 

Auntie “just so happened” to have a white dress lying around with a white sash around the middle that ties in the back and tiny blue gray flowers sewn around the hem. I shake my head at her antics but there is truly no stopping the woman when her mind is set on something. Pheadra weaves the small white flowers of an orange blossom into my hair before placing the string of pearls around my neck again. I touch them gently and look at the reflection in the mirror. I’ve never considered myself to be a particularly pretty girl but at least on my wedding day...well the reflection staring back at me is far more pleasing than I could have hoped for. A blush colors my cheeks when I think of what Erik said the night he proposed. He said it with such conviction...I have never had a man tell me such things before. 

Jocasta and Ulysses escort me outside before taking their seats, leaving me standing at the start of the path strewn with flower petals alone. My breath hitches in my throat as I descend down the aisle. The sun just barely piercing through the gray sky above. Don’t trip, don’t trip, don’t trip. I simply have to place one foot in front of the other until I reach the alter and come to a stop. Glancing up I find a pair of calm steadying blue eyes looking back at me and somehow I don’t feel so nervous anymore. Erik reaches out and takes my small hands in his large calloused ones, he gently rubs the pads of his thumbs over the back of my hand. 

It feels like it is just Erik and I right now standing before the eyes of god. Perhaps that is how your wedding day is meant to feel. The priest begins the ceremony. 

“Dearly beloved, we gather here today to celebrate the union of two souls. Of Erik Northman and Quinlee Fraser. It is always a blessing to join two such noble families together. Mr. Northman please repeat after me; I Erik Northman take thee, Quinlee Fraser, to be my wedded wife. To have and to hold from this day forward.” 

Erik’s gaze locks onto mine. “I Erik Northman take thee, Quinlee Fraser, to be my wedded wife. To have and to hold from this day forward.”

“For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health.” 

Erik repeats the priest’s words. “For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health.” 

“To love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee my troth.” 

“To love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee my troth.” Erik finishes his vow. 

The priest then turns to me and has me repeat the same vow to Erik. “I Quinlee Fraser take thee, Erik Northman, to be my wedded husband. To have and to hold from this day forward. For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health. To love, cherish, and obey till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I give thee my troth” 

Erik takes the ring and slowly places it on my finger. “With this ring, I thee wed. With my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods I thee endow. In the name of the father, the son, and the holy ghost, amen.” 

I feel myself shake as I pick up his ring and place it on him. “With this ring, I thee wed. With my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods I thee endow. In the name of the father, the son, and the holy ghost, amen.” 

The priest proclaims we may now seal our bond with a kiss. I reach up cradling the scarred side of his face in my hand. He leans over wrapping a hand around my waist and kisses me. It is the simplest of kisses, over before it even began, but the most profoundly real thing I have ever felt.

ERIK

My mind can barely wrap itself around the fact that I am currently kissing my wife. Quinlee Fraser is now Quinlee Northman. She is my wife. I could stand here kissing this woman, this woman who is mine, forever but the priest makes the tiniest “hmm-hmm” and I remember myself. Pulling away reluctantly I see those gray eyes gaze up at me. A tentative trust held within them.


	17. Chapter 17

JAMIE

After everything that has happened in my life, all of the hardships and heartache along with the pure joy and love I have experienced, finding out that my daughter’s are here in this time...I feel like my heart is so full it could burst. I couldn’t contain my tears when I first met Brianna. It was like gazing in a mirror, not just because we looked so similar but because she held the same burning fire in her heart as I. When we tried to find Quinlee the riots had already broken out. I have had to make a lot of difficult decisions in my life, but choosing to take Claire and Brianna out of Wilmington for the evening and leaving Quinlee behind was the hardest one I can ever remember having to make. First thing the next morning I went back into the depraved city to find her, but she was gone. Disappeared in the wind. My heart clenched as I feared the worst, that someone had stolen her. Kidnapped my wee bairn. Despite their protests I made Ian escort Claire and Brianna to the ridge while I stayed behind in the city tearing itself apart to find her. I searched every building, every alley, every outlying home. Governor Tryon sent his troops out to search for her as well. It wasn’t until two weeks later when Captain Freeman of the Sally Ann came back to port that I finally made any progress. He had just transported the sneaky lass to Riverrun with none other than Erik. The constricting feeling around my heart loosened for the first time in weeks. I ken Erik to be an honorable man. I am sure he and Jocasta are looking after the poor girl well. 

A couple of days later the captain had resupplied and was ready to embark down the river again to Crosscreek. It was strange talking to the captain about my own daughter, a daughter I had never met before. The man had a fond smile on his face when he told me about her. Called her a fair bonnie lass with a soft heart and a kind soul. “Easy to see why Erik likes her so much.” He comments. I feel uneasy at the way he says it, not knowing exactly what the man is trying to imply. 

Claire told me about Quinlee, told me about both my girls. She said they were like night and day - entirely different but one could not exist without the other. While Brianna was boisterous and opinionated and headstrong and courageous to a fault Quinlee was thoughtful and patient and tender and far to considerate for her own good. I worried for such a sweet lass, worried that someone would see that sweetness and try to take it for their own. Claire told me Quinlee did not have any suitors in her time, that she did not ken how to talk to a lad. She does not need to be bothered with such matters. Not a girl with her...condition, one who is so vulnerable. 

ERIK

The moment the guests had dispersed and we were alone at last I picked my wife up and carried her up the stairs. She let out a surprised yelp before laughing a high clear joyous laugh. It’s a glorious sound. As we enter our bedroom I set the girl down. She looks up at me with a trusting innocence in her eyes. Slowly I push her up against the door and lean down to kiss her, god I can’t believe I get to kiss her. Quinlee wraps her arms around my shoulders and I nip down on that plush honey flavoured bottom lip of hers. I don’t know what she puts on them but god do they taste good. Her little moan when our tongues start their dance again sends a thrill straight to my loins. She pushes impatiently at my vest and I almost rip the damn thing off. She tugs at my tunic and I yank that pesky barrier off as well. Quinlee pulls me back down onto her, lips biting and hungry as we clash together again. Those small soft fingers touch my bare chest and her nails lightly rake down my skin. I feel like my nerves are on fire and my stomach clenches at her unknowingly sensual touch. I push myself closer to her, pinning her against the door and trapping her hands against my chest. My wandering hands have a mind of their own and seem to want as little space between us as possible. I grab onto the back of her thighs and pull her legs up to wrap around my bare waist. Her face is suddenly much closer to mine, those lips are cherry red and swollen. I nose my way down her jaw line and nip at the skin until I reach the spot just behind her ear and get a beautiful breathy whimper from her. I feel my fingers dig deeper into the plush of her thighs through her wedding dress. I have the overwhelming urge to shred the thing off but I think that would frighten her. 

“Oh god Erik.” She squeaks out in that impossibly high bell chime voice. I bite down a little harder on the milky skin of her neck and get another squeak, her nails dig into my chest in reaction. I move one hand to her back and start pulling on the bow keeping the dress up, I pause and look in those gray eyes making sure it’s alright, she gives a shaky nod. I quickly yank the bow and pull the strings loose. She brushes those swollen lips softly over mine. The tenderness makes me slow everything down for a moment. I move us to the bed and set her gently on it, hovering over her. Those endless stormy eyes peer up at me pupils blown, skin flushed, and her rather ample chest heaving. Dark curly hair fanned out beneath her, wild flowers still scattered through it. “I’m still working on a better word for beautiful.” I murmur. She lets out a breathless laugh. “I can wait Erik, we have a lifetime for you to figure it out afterall.”

I pluck at her honeyed lips again and ever so slowly pull her dress down bit by bit. Once it’s past her curvaceous hips she shimmies a little to get out of it. I kick off my shoes and we both roll on the bed. I lie next to her and she moves closer before taking her hand and tracing one of my scars with a featherlight touch. Somehow that moment is more intimate than everything we have done since coming into this room. Quinlee ever so slowly kisses my scarred cheek. I don’t think I’ve ever had someone kiss let alone even touch my scar before. I feel a shiver rip through my body. My hand slides up her shift covered thigh to the small curve of her waist. She moves and places the tenderest of kisses on my lips. Quinlee pulls back a tiny bit and looks at me shyly. “I’ve never done this before.” She whispers. 

“Do you trust me alskling?” I ask, only a hair's breadth away.

Her gaze is searching and penetrating. “Yes.” 

“You say the word and I stop, alright?” I say pecking along her neck. She gives a small nod. I keep making my way down to her collar bone then carefully undo the pink bow and pull at the edge of her shift. My mouth moves before my hands do and nip down her breast until I reach her rose pink nipple. She keens and arches her back into me, tugging at my hair. God she feels good, she tastes good.   
I glance up at her and she looks stunned, mouth agape. “Do you still trust me?” I ask with a low cadence. She nods quickly and lets out a breathy yes. I nuzzle my way down her stomach until I am settled between her legs and slowly push her shift up those soft creamy thighs. I trail along after my fingers with my mouth, sending shivers up Quinlee’s spine. At last I reach my goal. I kiss up her inner thigh and put one hand on her hip bone. She takes in a deep breath when I put my thumb on her mons and find that small bundle all women share. “Oo-o-hh” she stutters out. I grin and put my mouth over that bundle, tonguing against it. Her next “oh” is much louder and her hand tugs almost painfully hard at my hair. Her hips seem to be moving of their own accord, my hand having to keep them in place. She is far more responsive than I imagined. 

I keep laving against that bundle and her hips try to move even more, god she is sensitive. After a few minutes of feeling her wriggle underneath me I decide to test a finger and find she is already wet. I’ve never been with a virgin before, I didn’t expect her to be quite this tight. I move the finger slowly to give her a chance to say no. She cries out a little aww but doesn’t tell me to stop. I keep moving the finger and return my ministrations to her bundle, waiting for her to relax into it. When she finally does she gives a startled cry and yells out “Erik!” 

I take the finger out and kiss up along her hip bone. “Yes wife?” 

“What was that?” She asks innocently. 

I keep making my way further up her body until I’m back at her neck. “Pleasure dear wife.” 

“Oh, I never knew...no one ever told me - told me about that.” She says through rasped breaths. 

“I would imagine ladies don’t talk about it much.” I comment, moving my way again to pluck at her lips. 

Quinlee stiffens a little underneath me before moving those deft fingers down my chest and slowly down my stomach, god she has no idea how she feels. I just about lose it when I realize she is trying to undo my pants. I reach down and feel her small hands are shaking slightly. “You don’t need to do that.” I whisper. I hesitantly undo my pants and watch to make sure she isn’t going to suddenly bolt. I kick my final piece of clothing off the bed. She stares at my chest and draws some random pattern on it with a finger. “I - I am ready Erik. If you want to, I mean?” She asks as if there is a world in which I wouldn’t want her. 

“Quinlee, I will always want to.” I kiss her again and it deepens instantly. Heat searing between us, her soft body writhing underneath only stirs me on more. Her warm thighs wrap around my waist and there is no space between us. I knead one hand down the back of her thigh and use the other one to line myself up with her. I look into her eyes once more to make sure, she gives a tiny nod. I push past her maidenhood and god she is warm and wet and feels far better than anything in my wildest imagination. I go in slowly, her face pinches for a minute and I swallow her surprised gasp with a kiss. “God alskling, you have no idea how you feel.” I growl out. It is an oddly sublime torture being in side of her but not being able to move yet. Finally after what feels like an eternity she tells me it is alright to move. I slowly pull out and dig my fingers in her hip before pushing back in. I groan with each thrust, her little moans spurring me on faster and faster, biting into the skin of her neck. I reach down and push on the bundle at her core as I keep pumping in and out. Just as Quinlee lets out a soundless cry I reach my own bliss.


	18. Chapter 18

JAMIE

Arriving on the shores of Riverrun I smile fondly at the grand estate. Somewhere inside of there is my wee bairn. The one I’ve only ever met in my dreams. I bound off the boat and have to stop myself from running up the steps of the porch. Ulysses greets me in the same stern manner I recall from before. “Mr. Fraser, we were expecting you. Please, allow me to see you into the parlor so you may speak with my mistress.” 

“Aye, in a minute, I would like to see my daughter first if you didna mind. Where is she?” 

“The...young mistress is back in the stables with Mr. Northman currently, but I think it would be wise to speak with Mistress Cameron first!” The man calls after me but I’m already rushing down the steps to find my daughter. 

Sprinting around the back of the grand home to the stables I come to a halt at what I see. Erik pinning the lass, my wee lass, to an oaktree ravishing her mouth with his. A horrendous monster the likes of which I haven’t felt in many years rears its head. I storm up to the giant lecherous brute and yank him off her before punching him across in the jaw. She lets out a scream. I swing at the man again but this time he dodges me. “Jamie! Are you outta your mind! It’s me!” Erik yells out. I manage to hit him square in the nose with my next throw. He takes a step back holding up his hands in an attempt to be placating. 

“What the hell do ye think yer doing with my daughter!” I snarl at him. 

“For god sake man nothing untoward was happening!” He screams while wiping away the blood gushing out of his nose before spitting some out. 

“Nothing untoward? Nothing untoward! You were pawing after like a letch! I don’t wanna see you ever touching her again do you understand?” 

“Well that may be a trifle difficult considering she’s my wife!” Erik practically growls back at me. 

I take a step towards the norseman but he doesn’t back down, doesn’t even blink. “You married my daughter? Behind my back? Like some thief in the night.”

“Are you...Jamie Fraser?” Quinlee asks in a timid voice. I turn around and the girl flinches away from me. Erik reaches out and pulls her to him, dwarfing her small frame with his massive one. 

“Aye lass, I am.” I tell her trying to get myself to calm down when I see the fear in her large gray eyes as she looks upon me. 

“JAMES ALEXANDER MACKENZIE FRASER!” I hear auntie screech from the back porch. 

Quinlee hides even further behind Erik. “Oh no.” She whispers. 

QUINLEE

This has got to be the most awkward situation I have yet to experience and I have my fair share of experience with awkward. The father I have never met just decked my husband I only met a little over a month ago. What is my life coming to? 

We all sit in the parlor. No one is drinking the tea Jocasta insisted in serving. I tend to Erik’s bloody nose and bruised jaw with a warm wet cloth Ulysses had fetched at my behest. Jamie stares him down all the while. You could cut the tension in the room with a knife. 

“Well...I think that was enough excitement for one day.” Auntie Jocasta comments idly. 

“Would anyone care to explain how my daughter was allowed to be wed without my permission?” Jamie seethes. 

“They had my blessing. That was sufficient for father O’Malley.” Jocasta tells him with a biting edge to her tone. 

“Aye, I’m sure it was. And I’m sure you had a hand in this arrangement did you not auntie?” 

I can’t help but feel the irritation building within me. I’ve never met this man before in my life. He may be my father but he has no say in whom I wed. If anyone were to have any say at all it would be mama or Jocasta. I didn’t just marry Erik because it was convenient. 

Auntie scoffs at him. “Do not take that tone with me. I have watched over her as if she were my own bairn. Like any good parent I ensured her safety and security by seeing she was wed to an appropriate man. Mr. Northman is such a man.” 

Jamie doesn’t say anything to that but his face is still livid. Jocasta slams her tea cup down in it’s saucer angrily. “Children would you two give me and my nephew a moment alone?” 

Erik helps me off of the settee and we go to sit on the front porch instead. I feel nauseous, I hate conflict especially when it involves me. Erik kneels in front of me and takes my hands in his before bringing them to his lips and kissing them gently. “Do not fret Quin. He’ll come around. Trust me, I’ve known the man long enough.” 

“Why - why was he so angry?” I whisper.

Erik cups my face gingerly. “Oh mitt hjarta, he was not angry with you. He was angry with me, just upset as all father’s are when it comes to daughters.” 

I shake my head. “No, not the man who raised me, not papa. He was many things when it came to me but he was never angry like that.” 

Several minutes later Jamie and Jocasta join us on the porch. They both still look upset but at least no one seems as if they are going to kill someone else. “Erik, why don’t you and I take a stroll along the riverfront.” Jocasta demands holding out her arm expectantly. 

My husband glances back at me with a questioning eyebrow raise. I try to give him a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry. I’ll be alright.”

He kisses my hands one more time. “You call out if you need anything understand? We’ll be close by.” I nod at him but my hands are still trembling. He lets out a sigh but obliges my auntie nevertheless. 

Jamie seems to hesitate as he sits down next to me on the bench. “I...I am sorry for losing my temper back there lass. I shouldna done that.” 

I fiddle with the ribbons on my dress. “No, no you shouldn’t have.” 

“Please forgive the outburst. I just...I didna expect when I first saw my wee bairn she would be in the arms of a man.” 

I glance up at him and notice for the first time that he has the exact same shade of blue eyes that Brianna has. The same streak of burning fire in them as her. “I suppose I can understand that...so long as you promise not to hurt my husband again.” 

He gives me a crooked grin. “I cannot make any promises but I will endeavour to not cause you any more strife. I willna punch him again without due cause.” 

I frown a little, I think that’s the best I’m going to get from the highlander. “Good lord you are just like her.” 

His eyebrows crinkle together in confusion. “Brianna I mean, you are just like Brianna.” I explain. 

“Aye, so your mother kept tellin’ me.” 

I feel the corner of my mouth quirk up. “I’m sure she did.” 

He clears his throat. “Mmh-hmm, I have known Erik for some time now. Known him to be a good man. He, he treats you well then? He hasn’t been...ungallant has he?” 

I blink at him in surprise. “No! Good heavens no. He is - he is gentle and kind. A little too overbearing maybe, but I’m sure that will calm in time.”

Jamie raises an eyebrow at me. “Knowing him I doubt it.” 

I scrunch my nose together agitated. “Probably not.” 

JAMIE

Talking with Quinlee on the porch, watching her movements, observing her mannerisms...she is so much like my mother it is uncanny. It’s not just her looks although she certainly bears a remarkable resemblance to the woman. Except her sweet heart shaped face, that is all Claire. It is something in her soft unassuming spirit that reminds me of my mother so. 

Jocasta and Erik rejoin us far too early. I want more time with the girl. I want all of the time in the world with my daughter. That evening as we settle down for dinner the lass tries her best to bring about polite conversation but I think she would have better luck pulling teeth. Finally she asks about how Claire and Brianna are doing. 

“They are both fine and safe and travelling to Fraser’s ridge with Ian. Murtagh will be waiting there for them. Speaking of the ridge I think it is high time we get you home lass.” I tell her. 

“Yes I think it is time we went back to my home on the north bluff.” Erik says with a possessive edge to his voice. 

I narrow my eyes at the man. “I think it would be best if she stayed at Fraser’s ridge with her family first.” 

Quinlee is quick to interject. “Why don’t we stop at Fraser’s ridge first Erik? Just for a night or two to check on mama and Bri? We can leave after that.” 

He looks to her and those cold blue eyes instantly soften. “Of course Quin...just for a night or two though.” 

At least I was able to get them to agree to come to the ridge first. If I have her there with Claire and Brianna maybe we can convince her to stay longer.

We retired to the parlor. Per my auntie’s request Quinlee starts playing the piano. I ken Claire mentioned she was a fair musician but she didna say just how talented she was. Quinlee is far more than just an average performer. Her deft fingers navigate the keys as easily as a sailor navigates the seas. She plays songs the likes of which I have never heard before...songs I can only assume are not of this time. 

That evening before I go to bed there is a knock on my door. I open it to find Erik standing there with a stern resigned expression on his face. “Can we talk?” 

“Aye, I think it’s high time we do.” I let the man into the room, slamming the door behind me. 

He rubs a hand over his face. “I didn’t mean to wed your daughter behind your back.” 

“Didn’t you though?” 

Erik glares hard at me. “Does it really matter now?” 

“No - no I suppose it doesn’t...but that doesn’t mean she still isn’t my daughter.” 

“I wanted to tell you that us marrying, it wasn’t just for the sake of convenience or because Jocasta demanded it.” He proclaims vehemently. 

“Aye, I can see that you care for the lass.” 

Erik’s gaze has a burning fire in them. “I don’t just care for her, I love her. She’s my wife and I love her more than anything on this god forsaken earth.” 

I feel myself hesitate at the sheer conviction in the man’s words. “Aye, perhaps you do…” 

“I know you feel betrayed Jamie and for that I am sorry, but I will not apologize for marrying her. That I will never apologize for.” 

“Swear to me Erik, swear to me that you will look after her, that you will cherish her, that you will protect her...always. For the love I bear her swear it.”

Erik claps his hand on my shoulder. “I swear it. To you, to her, to god himself if I have to.” 

I let out a relieved sigh. The man may have married her under less than ideal circumstances, but I know that he is honorable and I know he will keep his word. I clap my son-in-law back on his own shoulder. “Good, you're much more tolerable than that lieutenant Wolff anyhow.”


	19. Chapter 19

QUINLEE

Jocasta wants to send us off with an entire extra cart of supplies, much of it being trunks full of dresses. I try to refuse, it’s far too much, but the woman does not take no for an answer. “Think nothing of it sweet girl, you are kin! Whom else am I to spoil?” I pull her into a tight embrace. She lets out a startled chuckle but hugs me just as tight. “I’m going to miss you auntie.” I whisper into her ear before pulling back. She cups my face in her hand, her blue eyes misted over with unshed tears. “I will miss you dearly child. More than you know. You will write often will you not?” 

“Of course I will! I promise auntie.” 

Jocasta squeezes my hand one last time. “You may come to Riverrun whenever you please and stay as long as you like my dear.” 

“Thank you auntie, for everything, truly thank you.” 

Jocasta goes on to lecture Jamie and Erik for several minutes about how best to care for me before finally allowing us to start our journey to the ridge. It is a hard journey, far harder than I imagined it would be. Riding on the horse isn’t so much the problem, Erik still won’t let me have my own reins, it’s more the setting up and tearing down of camp each night. I have no idea what I’m doing and I’m not much help despite my pitiful attempts. Brianna was always the outdoorsy girl scout between us. Jamie and Erik seem to have come to some sort of tentative understanding. They aren’t punching each other anymore. 

At the very least I can fix Erik’s torn shirt. Jamie comes to sit next to me by the campfire as Erik goes off into the forest to find more wood. “What were you studying at University?” 

I smile to myself at Jamie’s awkward attempt at getting to know me. “I studied accounting, bookkeeping I suppose is the term you would use. I had just graduated actually before I - well - before we came here.” 

“Accounting? You must have an affinity for numbers then.” 

“Brianna and I both do actually, just in different manners. I was always more for algebra and equations while Brianna more favoured geometry and design.” I explain. 

“I see...what were you going to do after you finished at University then?” He asks thoughtfully. 

I tie off the knot I am working on and snap the thread, satisfied with the work. “Well I was going to start work at this large accounting firm, a um, a company that manages the finances and taxes of other companies. They had offices and partners all over the world...my boss had even talked about sending me to Germany and Switzerland for a few months.” 

He raises an eyebrow at me in surprise. “Sounds like an important job, lots of responsibilities. I am sure you would have done well for yerself.” 

I snort softly recalling the base salary they had offered. “Yes, yes I would have done quite well for myself.” 

“And now you are wed.” He comments almost like he’s realizing something. 

I swallow thickly. “And now I am wed…” 

The awkwardness between Jamie and I seems to have broken to a degree after that night. He asks me about my life in Boston whenever we are alone, anytime he ever gets near talking about Frank I always change the subject. Far too painful and complicated of an issue. 

I am careful not to touch Erik too much around my - my da as he asked me to call him. Although Erik certainly has no issue with grabbing my hand or my waist as he desires. Luckily Jamie has seemed to have calmed down and gotten over his initial anger at least enough not to fly off the rales. After the first few days the three of us come to a comfortable companionship. While it still bothers me that I’m an absolute moron when it comes to riding and camping, so much so that one of them constantly stays with me at any given moment, I’ve come to at least a grudging acceptance of the situation. 

After several long hard days of travel Jamie announces that we have finally reached the ridge. As we make our way down a lightly worn trail a rustic cabin comes into view. “Welcome to Fraser’s ridge mo ghraidh.” Jamie says with a proud smile on his face. I can’t help but smile back. “It’s - it’s breathtaking da.” 

Mama and Brianna come running out of the house followed by an older man with white hair. “Quinlee! Oh thank god Quinlee!” Mama cries out. I try to hop down from the carriage on my own but almost fall over in the process, da has to help me down instead. Mama pulls me into her warm embrace and I can’t stop the tears from flowing down my cheeks as I cling to her. 

“Mama! I missed you!” 

She holds me tighter, gently brushing the back of my hair with her hand. “Oh Quin, I missed you too. You don’t know how much.” 

Brianna comes rushing up and wraps her long arms around both of us. “Quin! God don’t you ever scare me like that again!” 

“Me? Scare you! My how the tables have turned!” I joke through unshed tears. Brianna pulls back and grins at me broadly. “It was about time wasn’t it?” 

“Come inside, please everyone come inside. You must be starving.” Mama says while wiping the joy filled tears away and wrapping her arm around my shoulders to lead me inside. 

We all sit around the table. The older white haired man introduces himself as Murtagh Fitzgibens. I ask where Lizzy is and Bri tells me she is away in town with Ian, our cousin apparently, on business but will be back tomorrow. 

Mama turns to Erik with a large smile. “Erik, it is so good to have you here! Jamie must have found you in Wilmington, we were wondering where you had wandered off to.” 

I shift in my seat uncomfortably. “Actually mama um, Erik and I have been travelling together for quite some time now. He...helped me in Wilmington. There were these two men and - and they had me cornered but Erik came just in time. He saw me safely to Riverrun.” I pause trying to think of how on earth to explain to her what happened after that. 

“We’re married.” Erik tells her bluntly before grabbing a piece of bread. I kick him under the table. 

“You’re - You’re what?” She stammers out. 

“Aunt Jocasta didn’t think the cabin was appropriate for the lass so she had her married off.” Jamie grunts out. 

“It’s...a little more complicated than that.” I try to explain. 

Mama stands up suddenly. “That - that woman! I could - Jamie can I see you outside?” The two of them slam the door on their way out of the cabin. Oh dear god. 

The man Murtagh claps Erik on the back. “Best of luck to ye lad, yer gonna need it. I’m gonna make myself scarce.” 

Brianna tries to ask what I could have been thinking but I give her a rueful stare before reminding her she handfasted with Roger the night he came to Wilmington. The moment I mention the man’s name her face falls and she storms off. Just like old times, Brianna and mama get angry and leave me on my own. Only this time I’m not alone, I’ve got Erik with me. I give his cheek a quick peck. “Don’t mind them. If it makes you feel any better I think we got off easy.” 

It takes mama over an hour to finally calm down and come back inside. Jamie must have told her what happened because she doesn’t ask a hundred and one questions when she returns. The two of us take a walk outside, just mama and I, and the only thing she asks is if I’m happy and if he has been kind to me. I nod at her. “Of course he has mama, you know him.” Fiddling with the edges of my skirts I finally work up the nerve to tell her about the painting. “Mama...there’s something else you should know. When I was back in our time Brianna, Roger and I we uh - we went to a Scottish festival in North Carolina. The festival was on this mountain actually. There was this one tent. A tent that had a history exhibit in it. One of the exhibits was paintings of the settling families and prominent figures in the area.” 

Mama looks at me skeptically. “What are you trying to tell me exactly?” 

“Mama...there was this painting I saw. It was me. A painting of me with Erik and - and our kids. I didn’t want to believe it at first, tried to convince myself it was a strange coincidence, but then when Brianna and I found out you and da were in North Carolina and then we found that article. Well, I don’t know, there was just this feeling of inevitability about it...then Erik found me.”

She nods slowly, a look of contemplation on her face, obviously turning the new information around in her mind. “You’re right - this is complicated.” Is all she says in reply. 

I let out a long sigh. “I don’t know mama, I don’t know what’s meant to be. All I know is that when I saw that painting it was like...like I found something I didn’t even realize was missing.”

Mama appraises me carefully, her blue eyes soften. “Oh Quin I - I know things were difficult for you in our time but back here, now, in this time....this time is dangerous Quin. More dangerous than you understand. I have missed you, missed you terribly, but I never wanted you or Bri to come back to this time for a reason. It isn’t safe for you here.” 

Agitation brews in the back of my dry throat. “I know it’s not safe mama. I understand that, I’m not an idiot. That doesn’t mean that there still isn’t a - a reason that I’m here. Maybe it’s where I’m supposed to be, maybe it’s fate!” 

Mama puts her hands up in defense. “Alright Quin, alright, we can talk more about this later. Let’s get you settled in, night’s beginning to fall.” 

Mama and I wash up in the cabin while Erik and Jamie head down to the stream to wash up. Erik and I sleep in the wooden hut outside next to the cabin while Bri sleeps inside with mama and da. I’m not quite sure where Murtagh is but he wasn’t kidding when he said he was going to make himself scarce. Erik yanks his cot across the small space so our beds are pressed up next to each other. I chuckle at him lightly. He gives me an innocent look. “What? I’ve had to keep my distance for the past two weeks travelling and I miss my wife.” 

I roll my eyes at him fondly. “Hmm, have you now?” 

His grin has a predatory quality to it. “Oh you have know idea dear wife. I’ve missed a few parts in particular.”

“Really? And what parts might-” He grabs me around the waist and pulls me down onto the bed with him before cutting me off with a kiss. I kiss him back giggling all the while. His lips are soft at first and I feel myself slowly melting against his large frame. One of my hands caresses the side of his cheek as my own lips become more and more pliant. 

Erik moves one of his knees between my thighs, spreading them apart before rolling on top so he is hovering over me cradled between my legs. I can already feel my lower belly begin to clench in anticipation. When we couple it always feels...transcendent. Like we have found a small piece of heaven on earth. I kiss him back with more earnestness this time, rolling my body up to meet his. That seems to get a quick response from him and tonight is no exception. His broad rough hands knead up the flesh of my thighs. One hand grabs at the skin just below my ass while the other hand slides between our bodies and I feel one of his skillful fingers slip inside of me. I let out an involuntary high pitched gasp as my hips begin to move of their own accord. I can feel him smiling against my mouth. I nip at his bottom lip in retribution. He lets out a rumbling laugh as his finger dives deeper into my core and he rubs against that spot that makes my limbs feel like pudding. Erik enjoys toying with me far too much. It doesn’t take long for my body to reach that precipice before he sends it tumbling over the edge. It always causes me to make this strange almost soundless cry. Before my body can come down from this otherworldly feeling Erik replaces his finger with something much longer and thicker. My body moves with his as he pushes into me over and over again in a rhythmic motion akin to waves crashing ashore. My nails claw at his shoulders. Our lips not quite kissing anymore but just barely touching; my odd breathy moans mixing with his panting grunts. I feel my body begin to reach that edge again but this time we both go flying over it together; which somehow makes the searing pleasure reaching even the tips of my toes that much more intense. 

Erik eventually pulls out of me and rolls on his side but our legs are still intertwined. It always takes several minutes for us to catch our breath and come back to our senses. My heavy lidded gaze falls upon his face. I enjoy watching him after we...he’s just - just so much more relaxed, unguarded than his usual intense demeanor. I reach across and give his naked chest one last kiss before resting my cheek against the warm skin, hearing his heartbeat underneath it I smile to myself before drifting off to sleep.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the late update! Literally just started winter break, hospital rotations do not take holidays into account :(

QUINLEE

The next morning da and murtagh take us all down to the distillery by the stream and show us their operation. They pour us all a small nip of the stuff. I barely manage to take a sip of it, the alcohol is so strong it almost knocks me over. Erik gives me a wicked grin as he downs his entire cup in one gulp. “Show off” I mutter under my breath, elbowing him playfully. 

Later Jamie brings out his rifle for us to practice with. Of course when I say us I mean Brianna. I could never shoot a gun when I was in my time and I certainly don’t think I could do so now. I remember one camping trip when Brianna and I were around twelve or thirteen papa took us out shooting. Brianna hit every target while I couldn’t even bring myself to touch the cold metal. The look of pure shock on Jamie’s face when Bri hit the mark dead on is unforgettable. Mama and I shared a laugh at his expense. 

I would like us to stay longer, but living on Fraser’s ridge with everyone else is temporary. I suppose I shouldn’t be so worried about living with Erik at his home. It’s only a little over an hour away on horseback. 

With cautious steps I head down to the stream's edge to help Brianna with the wash. I realize this is the first time that she and I have been alone together since I was married. Well since we were both married I suppose. She told me about what happened with Roger on that last afternoon we were in Wilmington together although she was fairly vague about the particulars. I remember Lizzie coming to my room and saying that Brianna was still asleep and did not seem well. She didn’t wake until noon that day. I could tell something was wrong, something awful had happened. She confessed about Roger and her handfasting the night before, them getting into a huge fight, and then him storming off. That was the same afternoon that her and I parted ways for the first time in months. She went to book us passage on the Sally Ann and I went to fetch provisions for the journey. Little did I know how much my life would change by that simple division of labor. That I would be accosted just a couple hours later and subsequently saved by my future husband. 

My normally loud, boisterous, effervescent twin has been so quiet since I've come to the ridge. It’s more than just Roger leaving. I can feel it in my bones. She was heartbroken when they broke up the first time, but nothing like this. Something more happened in Wilmington I just don’t know what. 

Sitting down next to her I grab for one of the wet tunics and begin scrubbing it against the washboard. We work in silence for a few minutes but I can feel the tension building as Brianna’s huffs become more and more agitated. “Penny for your thoughts?” I offer. 

Glancing over I see her jaw clench tightly. “My head is not a pretty place right now Quin.” 

“I figured as much. Doesn’t mean I don’t want to hear it.” 

She looks contemplative as she stares out over the stream. A few moments later Brianna finally sets down the wash and turns towards me. There is a fear in her eyes the likes of which I’ve never seen before. “Brianna? Brianna what is it?” 

“I uh, I - I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to do!” She sobs, tears spilling over her golden cheeks. I grab a hold of my twin and pull her towards me. Brianna sobs harder and harder on my shoulder. Her entire frame is shaking. “What is it Brianna? What happened?” 

“In Wilmington the same night Roger left, there was this man and he...he…” 

She doesn’t have to finish the sentence for me to understand what happened. “Oh god, oh my god. Brianna I - I am so sorry. Oh god Brianna!” I bind her to me tighter. Thinking that if I can squeeze her tightly enough I might be able to seep some of that pain and fear away. Just then mama comes down to the stream. “Bri! Quin!” She calls out in alarm at the site of the two of us crying. 

Brianna can’t hold the floodgates back any longer when mama makes her way down to the stream. She tells us after Roger left she returned to the inn and a man led her into a dark room where he - he violated her. To make everything worse she’s late. Her period’s late. I’ve never been a particularly angry or violent person but my god whoever the man is who did that to my sister, to my twin, to my other half...I want to rip their head clean off. I want to see the man’s body bloody and pummeled and writhing in agony. 

That night as I lie down next to Erik in the small wooden hut I curl up next to his warm body. He kisses my temple and runs his fingers through my thick curls in a gentle manner. I grip onto his nightshirt tightly. Unable to relax after what Brianna told mama and I today. How could I possibly leave her now? Now when she needs me most? 

“What’s the matter alskling?” He asks, fingers still intertwined in my hair. 

I lay silent for a few moments. Trying to find the right words. “It’s my sister. Something...something bad happened to her in Wilmington.” 

“Something bad…oh Quinlee I am sorry my dearest.” He says between another kiss to my head. I’m sure he knows what I’m getting at without saying the word outright. He wraps his arms around me. I burrow my face into his chest, seeking out his warm comforting person. “Do you think that we could stay another night instead of leaving tomorrow? For my sister?” I whisper the request against his shirt. 

He lets out a sigh. “One more night, for your sister then.” 

I place a tender kiss on his chest. “Thank you Erik, for understanding.” 

The next morning I trail after my twin all day. Watching her like a hawk. It is like a dark solemn cloud follows her everywhere she goes. It tears my heart in pieces knowing what happened to her, not being able to do anything to make it better for her. The two of us take a seat on a log overlooking the ridge. A beautiful view of the forest and river before us as the sun sets overhead turning the sky a pale pink and purple. Brianna rests her head on my shoulder. I take her hand in mine and stroke it gently. We don’t say anything, we don’t have to. 

We pack up our things the following day. Readying the cart to take to Erik’s homes...my new home. I procrastinate putting the last couple odds and ends auntie Jocasta gifted me into the cart. Fiddling with them next to the horses as Da and Erik are talking about crop yields over on the front porch. Brianna comes up next to me and loops her arm through mine, patting my hand gently. She gives me a melancholy smile. “I’ll miss you.” 

“I’ll miss you too...I will only be an hour away on horseback you know.” 

She sighs. “I know, I’m just being dramatic.”

“And I’ll be back in five days for a visit. Can’t have you going off getting into trouble without me.” I say jokingly. 

The corner of Bri’s mouth quirks up just the slightest bit. “I only ever get into trouble without you.” 

I pull my twin into a hug, clinging to her tightly, trying to put all of the love in the world into the embrace. “You’re not alone Bri, not ever. If you ever need to talk about…” 

“I know Quin, I know.” 

She helps me pack the last couple of small trinkets into the cart. After Erik and I say our goodbyes to everyone we head off. I find myself both immensely curious and anxious about going to this new home. Erik glances over at me. “What is that pretty head of yours worried about alskling?” 

“Nothing in particular. Just...strange going to a new home I suppose.” 

Erik pats my knees with a reassuring grin. “It’s our home now. If there’s anything you want or need you have but ask.”

I trace random patterns over the back of his hand resting on my knee. “I am sure I won’t want for anything Erik.”

“Still worried about your sister then?” He pries a little further. 

I keep staring at his hand, unable to meet his gaze. “Maybe…” 

“Your mother and father will look after her, you know? I am sure they would come fetch you if she really needed you.” 

I lean in and rest my head on his shoulder with a sigh. “I know...doesn’t stop me from worrying.” 

With the cart it takes us closer to two hours to reach the Northman estate. As we pull around the corner of a large oak tree a stately dark blue home comes into view. It’s identical to the home from the painting. Two stories with large windows and brick chimney places on either end of the house. It is surrounded by massive old willow trees with a prominent garden on display to the side of the home. It’s serenely beautiful, like something out of a fairy tale. Several outbuildings can be seen off in the distance. Erik points each of them out telling me what they are. From our perch a storage shed, a smoking room, and the smithy can be seen.

Erik helps me down from the cart. A portly older woman comes rushing out of the house. “Master Northman! Master Northman! You’ve returned!” 

“Brace yourself.” Erik mutters to me. 

The woman comes to a sudden stop when she sees me. I smile at her shyly and give a small curtsy. Nervously I reach for Erik’s forearm and grab a hold of it. 

“Oh...and who might this young lady be?” 

“Mrs. Johansson allow me to introduce you to my wife, Mistress Quinlee Northman. She is Jamie and Claire’s daughter.” Erik tells her with a proud broad smile on his face. 

The woman's eyes assess me from head to toe before she gives us a large toothy grin. “Well, it’s about time a fine lady made an honest man out of you. Isn’t she a pretty one? Get inside the both of you and let me fix you something to eat.” She gestures for us to follow along. 

Mrs. Johansson has us sit down at the small table in the kitchen before making a plate filled with fresh baked biscuits along with butter and strawberry preserves. She instructs me to call her by her first name, Agda. I try to get her to use my first name as well but she continues to refer to me as mistress. She pats both of our hands affectionately and gives us a heartfelt congratulations before scurrying off to check on the wash. 

“I like her.” I tell Erik fondly as I take another bite of the delicious biscuits with preserves. 

He rolls his eyes at me. “Of course you do. Just wait until you do something to incur her wrath. Then you won’t like her so much. Trust me I’ve been on the receiving end of it many times.” 

“Then I shall endeavor to be always cordial.” I retort back. 

He narrows his eyes at me. “Considering you are the epitome of politeness I doubt that will be a great difficulty for you.” 

Agda pokes her head in from the back door of the kitchen that leads outside. “Sheets are still drying. We’ll get the beds made here in a bit. Make sure you give the mistress the grand tour you got that?” She demands of Erik with a scolding finger. 

He gives her a mock salute. “Aye, aye captain!” 

She waves off his sarcastic reply and goes back outside. After finishing our scrumptious repast Erik takes me by the hand and shows me our home. We start in the dining room. It has a long polished oak table in it with eight matching chairs. Erik explains that him and his father crafted them back when he was a young boy. He even flips one of the chairs over and shows me where he carved his initials in it. A silver chandelier hangs from the ceiling. I can see us having everyone over for dinner here. There’s certainly enough room for a bountiful family meal. I find that I like the prospect of having a real family dinner immensely. I can picture the fantasy in my head. Erik shows me into the sitting room next. Two couches and four chairs all with matching dark green material arranged around another smaller oak table in the center right in front of the fireplace. All of the walls throughout the home are painted a dusky gray blue. He points out the door to his office in the back of the home. I poke my head inside the room only to find a desk with a few chairs littered around and stacks upon stacks of papers and books all spread about in a haphazard manner. I raise an eyebrow at him as he looks at the ground sheepishly. “What? I’m a busy man and organizing isn’t my strong suit.” He grumbles. 

Erik brings me upstairs next to show me our bedroom. A large four poster wooden bed frame sits in the center. The heavy plaid curtains surrounding the bed are tied back. A mustard yellow settee is at the bottom of the bed. A large bookcase is up against one wall with a massive oak armoire in the opposite corner. It appears someone has already brought my trunks up because they are stacked in the corner as well. “Hmm, seems I’ll have to make another armoire for your dresses alskling.” Erik comments while wrapping his arms around my waist from behind.

I roll my eyes at him. “I don’t have that many.” 

He laughs at me. “You know your aunt is only going to send more fabric right?” 

I swat at his shoulder, but he just laughs harder and kisses the side of my neck. I twirl around in his arms and get up on my tiptoes before kissing him soundly in retribution. I can feel him grinning against my lips as he pushes me backwards towards the bed. “Well aren’t you presumptive.” I tease.

“What can I say, having my wife finally in our room...makes me want to do wicked things.” 

I giggle at him. “Oh really, what sort of wicked things?” 

“Why don’t I show you dear wife…” He murmurs as his lips make their way back down my neck, nipping over my collar bone, until the back of my legs hit the bed and we both tumble on top of it laughing all the while. He hovers over me with a predatory grin. Erik lowers himself down and plucks at my lips like a musician might pluck at their instrument. A smoldering warmth begins to build between us. As our tongue’s dance for dominance the smolder becomes more of a bonfire and a manic sort of desperation courses through my veins. 

Erik’s hips rock down onto mine. I claw at the man’s shoulders like some vicious beast from hell trying to strip him bare. The two of us grab at every piece of each other we can reach, divesting one another of each cumbersome layer until we are left naked as they day we were born. I reach up and pull my husband back down on top of me as soon as he takes off his final undershirt, throwing it somewhere across the room. The man’s broad muscular body falls on top of my much softer and squishier one. Erik practically attacks my neck. Mauling it like a bear. I’m sure a massive bruise will be left in its wake. I can’t help but keen at the sensations he stirs deep within me. It feels like every time he touches me he is touching my very core. My nails dig into the flesh of his back. He digs his fingers into the back of my thighs and pulls them apart in harsh retaliation. His hands move up my body as he settles himself between my legs. He grabs at my hips and pins me down before lining himself up. Erik opens his eyes for a moment and looks down at me. I lift my lips up to meet his. Right as he shoved himself inside of me I bit down lightly on his bottom lip. “Oh good god woman you will be the death of me.” He mutters before pulling out and shoving into me again. I roll my hips to meet each of his thrusts. That deep penetrating toe curling sensation builds within me. Swelling larger and larger each time our bodies crash together. Just when I think I can’t possibly take it anymore that feeling seems to burst throughout my entire body. Euphoria ripping through me. I feel him reach his own pleasure as he spends himself inside of me. 

Erik rolls to the side, our limbs still tangled together on top of the quilt. He looks over at me with a broad contended smile, pulling me towards him until my head is pillowed on his chest. Both of us panting raggedly, our overheated skin getting cooled by the open air. Erik plants a kiss on my sweaty forehead. “Christ you are something else…” He murmurs. 

I chuckle at him in exhaustion. “I assume that is meant to be a compliment.” 

He laughs along with me. “Oh yes, trust me alskling, it is a compliment.” 

I rest my chin on his chest so I can look up at him. “Alskling...you’ve called me that several times now. What does it mean?” 

His cheeks turn a shade pinker than before. “It's uh, it's Swedish for my dear or my darling...it’s something you call the person you love.” 

“Are you telling me you love me Mr. Northman?” I ask in a teasing manner. 

His eyes soften as they gaze at me, there is a hint of fear in their blue depths. “I do you know, love you I mean.” 

I kiss his chest before looking back up at him. My heart feels so full in this moment I think it could burst. “I love you too Erik.”


	21. Chapter 21

QUINLEE

The next morning I feel a warm body stirring behind me. I let out a muffled groan as I attempt to burrow deeper underneath the covers. I can feel Erik chuckling next to me. “Do not fret love, go back to sleep. I’ve got to see to the sheep herds, attend to the goats and the like.”   
He says while leaning over me and planting a whiskery kiss to my cheek. He hasn’t shaved in a few days and the dark blond hairs are starting to grow in. 

I crack one bleary eye open and look up at my husband as his tall frame maneuvers out of our bed. Rubbing the side of my face into my pillow one more time I slowly pull myself up and fling my legs over the side of the bed. Wrapping the quilt tightly around my body to keep out the cold morning air. Groggily I search the floor for my leg braces. I remember taking them off last night before bed, I just can’t remember where I put them. Erik comes around to my side. “Quin, what are you doing? You should get some more sleep.” 

I wave him off. “I’m fine Erik. I’m already up. Besides, Agda said she’d show me her plans for the garden. Where did my braces go?” 

He leans down and finds them underneath the bed. I reach over to try and take them from him but he swats my hands away. Grabbing some clean stockings he rolls them onto each of my legs before putting the braces on for me. When he’s done I run my fingers through his light blond hair, he tilts his head back and looks up at me from his crouched position. I pull him towards me and kiss him soundly before releasing him. “Thank you.” 

He kisses me back. “Anytime alskling.” 

Agda comes up shortly after Erik departs to tend to the animals. She brings in a jug of steaming water and pours it into a fine porcelain bowl to wash my face and “any other bits” as she so politely phrases it. Once I’m cleaned up she sits me down in front of the vanity so I can see myself in the mirror as she pats some sort of cream onto my dry face. She tells me it will keep my fair skin looking youthful over the years to come but I should not ask her what is in it. Agda starts brushing out my tangled mess of curls. “Such a beautiful color, and so long and thick.” She compliments. I smile at her in the mirror and thank her for fixing my cumbersome hair into a long braid tied at the bottom with a blue ribbon. 

After getting me changed into a simple dark green skirt and tan vest to put over my long sleeved undershirt we head to the kitchen for a quick breakfast. A wave of nausea overcomes me the second I smell the food. I clutch at my stomach willing myself not to hurl. Agda flutters about me in a fretful manner. She has me sit down and gets me some mint to chew on which helps a little. After several minutes it finally passes and my stomach stops rolling over. I manage to get down a couple bites of a biscuit and some tea but that’s all. 

Agda hums a merry tune as we work side by side to clean all of the dishes. She has a wonderful deep tone. I find myself humming along with her. Agda pats my hand affectionately as we finish up. “Thank you dearie, come now and let me show you our garden. Spring is here finally and there is much to do. I’ve got some herbs and other such things to pick as well. Let us put a shawl on you first. Can’t have the mistress catching a cold now can we? Especially seeing as you have not been feeling well.” 

She wraps a thick patterned woolen shawl around my shoulders and I follow along after her like a little duckling. “Just finished tilling the soil yesterday, all ready to be planted. Here is where we will put the beets and cabbage. Over there we’ll put the broccoli and cauliflower. Down the hill we'll plant the onions and potatoes. We’ve already got the berry patch and grape vines replanted just last week. There will be fresh berries here in a few months time. Augh, and over here we have the flower and herb garden. There is still some sage and thyme that needs to be picked if you care to join mistress?”

I nod at her. “Of course Agda.” 

She opens up the wooden fence into the garden. “We’ll start over here. Now you let me know if you become too tired or your legs start bothering you. I will not have you becoming unwell, not under my care.” She warns me sternly. 

We get to work in the well sized garden patch. Collecting the last of the sage and thyme into our baskets. Agda shoos away a precocious squirrel that keeps trying to join us in the garden. We finish up in a timely manner. Agda instructs me to take the baskets inside and set them on the kitchen table while she goes to check on the chickens and collect some eggs. I try to join her but she waves me off, telling me she can show me how to do it another day if I am so inclined. I want to learn. I want to help as much as I can. 

After dropping off the basket of herbs I grab my sewing kit and go to the parlor. I can fix the hem of my petticoat that got torn during our journey to the ridge at least. A few hours later I hear Agda coming back into the kitchen. I do what I can to help her with the evening meal. We prepare a bounty for the farm workers on the Northman estate. Packing the food away she calls in a young boy named Thomas to help us carry it all outside. Agda introduces him proudly as her grandson. He can’t be older than eleven or twelve. He gives me a nervous little bow and mumbles mistress under his breath. “Oh please call me Quinlee.” I ask him, which of course he takes to mean ‘mistress quinlee’. It is a hopeless battle. 

The three of us take the packed up meal down the well trodden path towards where the animals are kept. I spot Erik with four other men herding the sheep along back into their corrals. There are two other pens with several goats and a few hogs. I notice the chicken coop up on the side of the hill as well. One of the men sees us approaching and nudges my husband in the ribs. Erik glances up at us and smiles. We reach them just as they are putting the last of the sheep into the pen. Erik wraps an arm around my waist and kisses my cheek before introducing me to the other workers; Oskar, Stefan, Niklas, and Sven. They each bow their head towards me as they are introduced and mumble ‘mistress’. 

There are three large barrels full of water nearby the pen that we use to set up the spread of food we have brought. Agda doles out heaps of mashed potatoes, a hearty meat stew, pickled beets, and cornbread with honey onto tin plates for us all. I pour ale into each of our tin mugs. The men all raise their glasses and yell out “skaal!” before clinking them together and taking a large gulp. Agda whispers to me that it is the swedish way of toasting. 

They all talk in a strange mixture of swedish and english, seeming to fall easily back and forth between the two languages. It is tricky at first to follow along, but there is enough english mixed in that I understand the gist of what they are saying. Speaking of where they took the sheep and goats that day for grazing and where they might take them tomorrow instead. Taking note of various hunting grounds for the future along the way. Agda reminds them that three of them will need to stay here tomorrow to do the planting. Erik, Oskar, and Sven volunteer to work in the gardens. Erik seems so comfortable and relaxed amongst his workers. If one didn’t know he owned the land you would never guess it was him given how they all interacted. After coming from Riverrun where they were not workers but slaves it was relieving to say the least. I worried that Erik might have owned slaves when we first wed, but when I brought up the subject he had wrinkled his nose and said neither him or his father supported such practices. That is part of the reason why they settled so far inland away from the plantation owners. Many of the workers and settlers amongst the estate immigrated from the same village in Sweden as Erik. 

When we are all finished the sun is just beginning to set on the horizon. Twilight falling over the beautiful rolling mountains. Oskar, Stefan, Niklas, and Sven all say good night before heading off along small winding paths throughout the hillside to their own cabins. Thomas branches off as well and scurries away to the blacksmith’s abode. Agda explained that her sister Hanna was wed to the estate’s blacksmith. Some nights Thomas spent at the main house with her and other nights he’d go and stay with his great aunt. She said I’d meet Hanna along with many of the other settlers wives in a couple of days when they did the wash. The place certainly runs like a well oiled machine under Agda’s meticulous care. 

Agda and I finished cleaning the dishes while Erik began heating up large batches of water for us to wash the days grime away. After we’re scrubbed clean Erik and I sit by the smoldering fire in the parlor, reading and relaxing by candle light before heading off to bed. The next few days pass in much the same manner. Lots to do at the beginning of spring in preparation for the coming months, especially since Erik has been away for the past several weeks. I like it though. Like feeling like I’m contributing even just a little. I get to meet Agda’s sister Hanna along with over three dozen of the nearby settlers wives who live and work on the Northman lands on wash day. We all gather along the river with baskets upon baskets of clothing and sheets and tablecloths to be cleaned. It is one mass group effort that takes the better part of the morning and afternoon to accomplish. Thomas and one of the farm workers, Stefan, help us bring all of the heavy wet mounds of clothes up to the main house so they can be hung on the clothes line and dried out. 

It has only been a few days but I am beginning to feel at home in these mountains. Everyone on the Northman lands have been so kind and welcoming and helpful. It was not what I expected, but it is far better than I could have imagined. I like being surrounded by families, by new friends who drop by the main house, by the laughter of children running around through the woods. It is nice not being so alone like I was in Boston. In fact these days I’m never alone. 

As we get up this morning there isn’t much to do before heading out to Fraser’s ridge to spend the day with my family. Erik helps me onto one of his old horses. A slow and steady gal named Bessie. Making our way further up along the ridge and looking back towards Erik’s prosperous lands it is easier to see the massive fields of tobacco that have been planted in the valley below. Acres upon acres upon acres of it, and those are just the tobacco fields. Apparently there are large swaths of land for corn, wheat, barley, potatoes, and several other crops further upstream. The garden next to the main house is just for us, our own consumption, where as all of the crops below are destined to be sold. 

When we reach Fraser’s ridge Jamie comes rushing up to us as we dismount. Pulling me down into his large arms and hugging me tightly. “It’s only been a few days.” I say jokingly while hugging him back. 

“Aye, and yet I missed you all the same lass. Come inside then the both of you and let us break our fast. Bri should be up soon.” He tells me while putting his arm around my shoulder and leading us both to the cabin. 

Mama smiles warmly at all of us as she finishes scraping the eggs into a large bowl and setting them on the table. Hungrily everyone besides me starts digging in, passing the food around the table with Murtagh and Ian. I still feel queasy every morning and cannot bring myself to eat much until after noon at the earliest. Mama looks at me suspiciously when I tell her I’m not hungry because I’ve been feeling nauseous. 

Jamie has certainly warmed back up to Erik and they seem to have returned to their easy manner before I ever came along. Joking back and forth with one another, talking about crops and animals and local politics. It’s easy to see why they are friends. They have plenty in common. Mama still glances at Erik hesitantly but otherwise she is kind and cordial to him. I know she didn’t want me coming back to this time in the first place and now that I’m wed to Erik...well, that’s another reason for me to stay. A big reason. 

Just as we are halfway through the meal talking about Da’s whiskey venture Bri comes into the cabin slamming the door open with Lizzie trailing along behind her. My twin’s face is full of fury. “Where is Roger? Lizzie told me Roger was here and Jamie beat him.” 

Mama looks at her confused. “I thought Roger went back.” 

“Yeah, I thought so too, but he didn't, did he? What did you do to him?” Bri spits at Jamie. 

Mama glances at Jamie suspiciously. “Your hand…” I follow her gaze and notice a dark bruise blossoming on his knuckles. 

“It’s true isn’t it?” Bri practically screeches at him. 

Murtagh starts pushing back his chair. “I think I’ll uh, wait outside.” He gestures towards Ian. “Come on lad.” As they both move to stand up Brianna rounds on Ian. “No! He stays. He was involved in this too. Weren’t you cousin.” She says the last word with a mocking hiss. Murtagh gives the poor boy a pitiful look before heading out the door. 

“Jamie what have you done?” Mama questions him voice full of concern.

Da looks to all of us bewildered by the sudden turn of events. “Aye, I gave a man a beating. But if it was yer historian, then I didna ken it. You said he’d already left here. Even so, if ravished ye as Lizzie said…” 

Bri lets out a frustrated ‘ugh’ cutting him off. “Lizzie was wrong. He didn’t!” 

“What he didna bed ye?” 

“No!” She cries out, but then sighs in exasperation. “Well, yes he did but I wanted him to. We were handfast and then we got in this huge fight and then he left and that was…” 

“You bedded him from lust? Ye said he’d raped ye of yer virtue. I nearly killed the man.” Jamie interrupts her angrily. His eyes are full of wrath as he stands up and turns on my twin. “To think I was defending your honor, and now I come to find ye claim yourself violated upon findin’ yerself with child.” 

Brianna rears back her arm before slapping him hard across the cheek. “I was violated, you self righteous bastard, by someone else! You beat up the wrong man!” 

Jamie stares at all of us stunned. “Is it true?” 

Mama comes around the table and starts pulling Bri towards her, giving Jamie a look confirming that it is true. Da takes a step towards them. “I’m sorry lass, I…” 

“Go to hell!” She screams at him, tears beginning to form in her eyes as she curls into my mothers arms. 

Jamie looks crestfallen. “I’ll make it right. You have my word as your father.” 

“My father would never have said the things you said to me.” Her voice wobbles with deep felt pain and anger. “He was a good man. You’re nothing but a savage.” Bri falls into our mother’s chest with her hands over her face as she weeps.

“Then who was it? Who attacked you cousin?” Ian questions. 

Brianna never told me who it was that had violated her, I thought it was a stranger, but the way mama and her share a knowing look she must have found out. Bri nods at her and mama pulls out her old silver wedding band from a pocket before setting it on the table. Jamie and Ian both stare at it in shock and horror as Da slowly picks it up. 

“It was him? Bonnet?” Jamie questions rhetorically with pure unfiltered hatred. 

“Yes, now where the hell is Roger!” 

Ian looks up at her with a guilty expression on his face. “Wi’ the Mohawk. I - I sold him to the Mohawk.” 

“You sold him!” Brianna takes two large strides and strikes Ian across the face so hard the boy falls back into his chair. “Bri!” I yell at her. I understand she’s angry but slapping everyone isn’t going to help. 

Ian cradles the cheek she struck. “I thought he had violated you cousin!” 

Bri places her hands on the table, leaning over it. “Yeah, I understand. Thanks.” She says in a sardonic manner.

“I’m so sorry mistress.” Lizzie apologizes through her tears. 

“You should be.” Bri bites back at her voice filled with hurt.

Jamie lets out a strangled cry before knocking half the dishes off the table causing me to jump in surprise at the sudden movement. Erik pulls me closer to him and covers my head with his hands to stop any of the shards of clay from hitting me. In his angry tirade Da knocked the chair over as well causing it to fly against the wall. 

Brianna slams her hands down on the table. Tears streaming down her face. “NO! No, you do not get to be more angry than me!” Jamie looks as if he is in physical pain trying to rein in his fury. 

You could cut the tension in the room with a knife. The raw anger hanging in the air is almost suffocating. “Now how do we get Roger back? Where do the Mohawk live?” Bri asks. 

“They - they were just passing through, trading with the Cherokee.” Ian explains out of breath, blood pouring out of his nose. 

“So we go after him.” Brianna proclaims. 

Mama walks towards her in a calm gentle manner. “Bri...the Mohawk live in upstate New York. That’s at least seven hundred miles from here.”


	22. Chapter 22

QUINLEE

That evening as I stand around the bright bonfire outside Erik comes up and wraps his arms around my shoulders, enveloping me in his warmth. “I knew your family had a temper but this morning was...something else.” He whispers into my ear. 

I turn my head and glance up at him, letting out a very unladylike snort. “Yeah, well, welcome to the family. Although this morning is probably the worst either of us will ever see it. With any hope nothing like this will ever happen again.” 

He lets out a heavy sigh. “God I hope not. Your parents told me months ago about what happened with Bonnet on the Sally Ann and now with what he has done to Brianna…” 

I rub my hand over his lightly. “I know. I can hardly stand to think it.” 

Erik wraps his arms around me tighter. “Sometimes I still think about what those men in Wilmington almost did to you and I just...if I hadn’t gotten there when I did…” 

I stare up into those steel blue eyes of his. “But you did find me in time. That’s all that matters.” 

He seems to be lost in thought as his face morphs into cold stone. “I’ve killed men for less than that, for far less than that.” 

I feel a shiver run up my spine. I know what he’s referring to. He eluded to it once when I asked him about his time serving under George Washington. “You’re talking about the French Indian war aren’t you?” 

He nods solemnly, not saying another word on the matter. I squeeze one of the hands he still has wrapped around me, rubbing my thumb over the back of it in what I hope is a soothing manner. More people begin joining us around the open flame until everyone is gathered around it. We have to come to a decision over what to do next and we have to make a decision tonight. 

“Will they kill him?” Bri asks directing her question at Ian. 

“I don’t think so…” He tries to reassure her. 

“I have traded with the Mohawk for decades. They are fierce but honorable. If Roger is of use to them they will not kill him. They often adopt outsiders into their tribe to replace the ones who are killed or die of sickness.” Erik chimes in. 

Ian stands up, holding onto a large white pendant around his neck. “When I gave them to him they gave me this and…” 

“So that was your price?” Brianna cuts him off sourly. 

Our cousin looks at her forlornly still gripping the pendant. “Aye, I suppose it was. But now this can help us find their village.” 

Erik lets go of me and walks over to Ian to inspect the necklace. “Hmm...I do not know exactly which village this comes from. My friend Black Wolf might though.” 

“Aye, with Erik’s help your cousin and I will find where they have taken Roger and we will bring him back to you. I promise. We will trade all we have. Whiskey, cloth, coin…” Jamie tells her with an edge of desperation in his tone. 

Brianna glares at him in disbelief. “You think I’m letting the two of you go and find him alone? You’re insane. You’ve done enough damage. We’re all going.”

Ian's forehead furrows together. “They are more than a week ahead of us. If they dinna stop we’ll be lagging behind for months.” 

“So we’ll go faster.” Brianna insists.

“Not wi’ a lass wi’ child among us.” Jamie tells her firmly. “If we must go all the way to New York, there and back it’s fourth month's time or more.” 

“Definitely more. Trust me even on the quickest trails reaching the Mohawk and coming back to North Carolina will take at least seven months, likely closer to eight. Not accounting for what time it may take to convince them to release Roger.” Erik explains. 

“Brianna…” Mama interjects. She jerks her head towards the side indicating that they need to talk alone for a moment. The two of them wander off a ways to talk privately. Their voices are whispers at first but they start talking louder when Bri says that she wants Mama to go with them to the Mohawk and leave her behind on the ridge. “No! Absolutely not.” Mama tells her. 

“Mama, he’s going to need a doctor.” Bri tries to reason with her.

“I am not leaving you alone here. Not in a million years.” 

“I’ll have Lizzie, I’ll be fine.” Brianna tries to refute.

“I am not leaving you and Lizzie here alone.” Mama yells at her exasperated. 

“Well then...uh, then think of something else.” Brianna says obviously frustrated. 

“You’ll stay with Quinlee then at our home while we’re gone.” Erik offers as a solution.

I do a double take when Erik says those words. “We’re gone? What do you mean by while we’re gone? Surely you don’t mean…” 

Erik crosses his arms over his chest and lets out a deep sigh while staring at the ground. “I have to go with them alskling. It is a long and treacherous journey to New York. One they have not made before. They do not know the best ways. Besides far as I’m aware I’m the only one who speaks any Mohawk.” 

I turn away from him, from all of them for a moment. Covering my mouth with the back of my hand. Logically he makes a sound argument. Crossing seven hundred plus miles of unknown terrain without a guide who knows the land is stupid and dangerous. Yet my emotions seem to be running wild, wanting to selfishly demand my husband stay behind with me. 

Mama frowns at him. “But - but I’m the only healer for miles. There aren’t any midwives close enough. If something happens...if we don’t make it back in time for the birth…” 

“Aunt Jocasta. It’s the safest place and I know she has midwives in Riverrun. Physicians are close by if they need to call on one.” Jamie interjects.

“But Riverrun’s in the wrong direction. We’d never catch up with the Mohawk.” Ian points out. 

Murtagh stands up from where he’s been sitting. “I’ll take her. I remember Jocasta from Leoch. It’s been an age but I remember.” 

Jamie nods. “Aye, I’ll write her a letter explaining everything. Lizzie can go with you. I’ll ask Tom Burley to look after the animals and crops.” 

“Good, it’s settled then.” Brianna proclaims firmly. 

“Brianna…” Mama tries to interject. 

“Mama, you’re going. All of you are. And you’re going to bring him back to me.” 

I feel as though I’m going to break down into a messy puddle at any moment. Erik can’t leave. Not now, not after we were just married. It’s only been a little over a month since we wed. I want Roger to come back safely. He’s more than just Brianna’s hand fasted husband...he’s my friend too. At the same time the thought of sending Erik away to retrieve him makes me feel ill. I lean against the nearest tree, clutching onto my stomach again. Erik and mama both come over. Erik places a steadying hand on my back while mama cups my face in her hands before assessing me thoroughly. 

“Do you feel faint Quin? Would you like to lie down?” She asks.

I nod my head at her, trembling slightly. Erik puts his arm around me and helps me inside. Once I’m sitting on the edge of the bed mama shoos him out. He glances at me worriedly but complies with my mother nonetheless. She walks back over and sits on the bed next to me, letting out a long sigh. “Quin I’ve been meaning to ask...how long have you been feeling unwell?” 

“I - I don’t know. The past week or so mostly. Probably just caught something. Why?” 

She turns towards me more fully. “Is it mostly nausea? In the mornings?” 

I nod my head at her. “Yes but…” My brain freezes when I realize what she is getting at. It can’t be. I can’t be - be pregnant. I start doing the math in my head. 

“Is your period late?” She asks me bluntly. 

“Close to three weeks.” I barely manage to mutter out.

“And you’ve been married a bit over a month right?” 

I nod at her slowly. My head still foggy with disbelief. She lets out another sigh. “Quinlee, if you’re that late by this point then well...there isn’t much else it could be besides pregnancy. If I had to guess you probably conceived sometime shortly after your wedding.” 

“I - I can’t believe it.” I murmur. 

Mama runs a tired hand over her forehead and down the side of her face. “Well, what exactly did you think was going to happen eventually?” 

I hold up my hands defensively. “I know - I know mama. We’ve had the talk plenty I just...just didn’t expect to become pregnant so soon.” 

“Sorry, I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said that.” Mama apologizes while wrapping her arms around me and tucking my head underneath her chin. “I wish we had more time, that I could give you more time to process this...but we have to leave in the morning. If you want me to - to do something about your condition it would have to be tonight.” 

“Do something? What do you…” It dawns on me what she is insinuating. “Oh - oh mama no I couldn’t. I wouldn’t do that. Not with Erik’s and mine’s child.” 

Mama takes my hands in hers and looks me in the eye. “Quinlee, you have to realize something. The same something that I just told Brianna the other day. You can go through the stones pregnant, we know that because I did with you two, but with a child I just don’t know. They might not be able to travel or they might be taken to a completely different time instead. If you have this child then you might not ever go home. I’m not trying to pressure you one way or the other. I just want you to understand what might happen and give you the option.” 

I stare down at our joined hands. “I...I don’t think I’m meant to go back mama. I know that might not be what you want to hear. But I just - I can’t really explain it. I think I’ve known it for a long time though. Ever since I first went through the stones. It was just a feeling.” 

She slowly lets go of my hands and pulls me into a hug. “Oh Quin...I just want what’s best for you. I just want you to be safe.” I can feel her tears rolling into my hair. 

“I know you do mama.” I whisper. 

She pulls back slightly and wipes away her tears. “If you’re sure that this is what you want then I’ll stand by you. Always. And I will love that child, both of my soon to be grandbabies, with all of my heart.” Mama says with a watery smile. 

I kiss her tear stained cheek. “You are going to be the world’s greatest grandmother, you know that?” 

She laughs at me lightly before fixing me with a more serious and sincere expression. “And you my dear are going to be the world’s best mom.” 

I tell her to let Erik back inside so we can give him the news. The man is standing right in front of the door when she opens it. When he sees that we’ve both been crying he looks between the two of us anxiously. “What is going on? Is she sick? Quin are you sick?” 

“Um...not quite love. You should probably sit down.” I tell him. Instead he comes and kneels in front of me. Taking my hands in his and gripping tightly. “Please alskling, what is it?” 

“I’m - I’m not sick per say I'm just...pregnant.” 

He stares at me blankly for a good long while. “You’re...you’re with child? Are you certain?”

“Yes we’re quite certain. Mama was the one who noticed my morning sickness and then I’ve been late and well…there isn’t much else it could be.” A deep seeded fear begins to gnaw at my gut. We had never spoken of children before. I thought we’d have more time. I didn’t think that I’d fall pregnant so soon. What if he doesn’t want a child right now?

He cups my face tenderly in his large calloused hands. Swiping one of my stray tears away. “You’re telling me I’m going to be a father? We’re going to be parents…” 

I nod hesitantly at him unable to meet his gaze. He tilts my chin up and forces me to look into his eyes. Eyes filled with a wonderment and joy, the likes of which I had never seen before. He has such a bright smile on his face it could rival the sun. “We’re having a child alskling! My god we’re having a child!” 

Erik kisses me, kisses my lips, my cheeks, my nose, my chin. I let out a relieved breathless laugh. “You had me worried there for a moment.” 

He pulls back slightly and looks at me confused. “I had you worried? You had me worried! I was pacing outside on the porch thinking you were horribly ill.” 

Mama comes over and places a gentle hand on each of our shoulders. “I think congratulations are in order for the both of you. Shall we tell your father? The man will be over the moon at the news I’m sure.” 

I nod at her still feeling somewhat dazed by the sudden turn of events. “Why not? Let’s tell everyone they’re going to find out soon enough.” 

Da was so surprised when we told him a stiff breeze could have knocked him over, but he was indeed over the moon. Brianna gave me a hug and congratulated me as well but there was still a deep sorrow in her eyes and heartache in her voice. It’s been a lot for one day. Murtagh and Ian both let out whooping sounds and clap Erik on the back. 

After much argument, mostly by me, it was decided by everyone else that I am to go with Brianna to Riverrun. With how long their journey to the Mohawk will be mama might not make it back in time for even me giving birth. The next morning Erik and I return to our home first to appraise the household of what is happening and prepare for both of our unexpected journey’s. Agda practically screamed with joy when we told her that I’m pregnant. She hugged me like the grandmother I never had. “I knew it! I knew you were going to bring a blessing to us! I knew it!” She cried out. 

I only just barely began unpacking and here I am packing everything up again to return to Riverrun not even two weeks since we arrived on the ridge. At this rate I should just live out of my trunk permanently. Both Erik and I hug Agda and Thomas one more time before heading back to my parent’s cabin to depart. They both wave wildly at us from the front porch of our blue house until we turn around the bend and cannot see them anymore. 

I can barely bring myself to say goodbye to mama again. Not after so recently finding her after all of this time and all of this searching. Saying goodbye to Erik though, that ends up being the hardest goodbye of all. Maybe the goodbye is just hard because I’m pregnant with his child. I cling to the man stubbornly until the very last minute that we have to leave. Erik leans over when I tug on the front of his shirt. He runs his fingers through my hair until he reaches the back of my neck and tilts my head towards him. I go up on my tiptoes to close that tiny bit of space left between our lips. We both cling to each for a few moments; desperately I try to memorize his touch, the feeling of his lips on mine. Then we have to pull apart. He helps me one last time onto the cart. His hands rest on my waist after I’m seated. Erik stares at my stomach for a moment before leaning forward and placing a quick kiss on it for our bean sprout growing inside. “Take care of our little smatting while I’m gone.” He requests with a sad smile. 

I cannot help but smile back at him. “Smatting? And that would be swedish for…” 

“Baby.” He tells me fondly. 

“Should have guessed that.” 

“I love you Quinlee.” He says with undeniable conviction. 

I brush my hand against the side of his scarred cheek, he closes his eyes and leans further into the touch. “I love you too Erik.”


	23. Chapter 23

ERIK

As we watched the cart with Quinlee, Brianna, Murtagh, and Lizzie pull away I felt as if my heart was being wrenched out of my chest following along with them. I wanted nothing more than to be with my wife, to stay with her especially now that she is carrying our child, but it seems fate has other plans for us. Claire comes up and puts a gentle hand on my tense shoulder as the cart turns around the corner out of site. A sad but warm smile on her face that looks so much like her daughter’s. Whatever sort of residual tension there was between us seemed to finally melt away after last night’s announcement. I am glad for it. Claire is more than just the local healer to me, but a good friend as well. And now...now she is my mother-in-law and my soon to be child’s mormor. We are family in the truest sense of the word. 

“She’ll be safe there you know. Jocasta will look after her.” Claire tries to be reassuring. 

I heave out a long sigh. “I know...I will just miss her is all.” 

She pats my shoulder. “We both will. I - I wanted to say that despite it all coming about under less than ideal circumstances...I am happy for you. Happy that you found someone. You love her and watch out for her and as her mom that is all I could wish for. It was just a hard adjustment is all. Quinlee has always been my little girl…” 

“You know I would do anything for her right?” 

Her kind eyes look up at me. “I know you would. You are a deserving man Erik. You have a caring and generous heart, just like her. Coming along to help us find a man you’ve never even met before is proof enough of that.” 

I snort at her and cross my arms over my chest. “Whoever this Roger is he better be worth it.” 

Claire’s jaw ticks as she looks at the ground. Anger about all that has happened clouds her usually calm demeanor. “We have to get him back. We just have to.” 

Just then Jamie comes up behind us. An expression of desperate apology on his face. “We will sassenach. I swear to you we will.” 

Claire gives him a jerky nod before muttering about checking on the animals and walking away. Jamie’s eyes trail after her. He rubs a frustrated hand underneath his chin. “Give it time. She will forgive you eventually.” I tell him with a clap on the back.

“Aye, aye I sure hope so.” 

“It was an honest mistake highlander. Give yourself some leave.” 

A tense sort of grimace crosses his face. “That is kind of ye to say lad.” 

“Honestly I’m just glad I only got one punch to the face for marrying your daughter. Didna realize I was getting the friendly treatment.” I say jokingly trying to lighten the mood. 

That manages to drag a bit of a chuckle out of the Scotsman. “Aye, to think ye could have been sold to the Mohawk instead.” He jests in a dark tone. 

“That’s the spirit.” I reply sardonically giving him one final pat on the back before going to help Ian load up the rest of our supplies for the long journey ahead. 

We stop to see the Cherokee first and speak with Black Wolf. After consulting with a few of the elders my friend is able to confirm that the pendant comes from the Mohawk village of shadow lake. I pull out my map and between Black Wolf and the elders they are able to determine roughly where this shadow lake is. I frown at the map, it’s even further north into the Mohawk territory than I expected. That means a longer journey. 

“I understand you are to be a father.” My friend comments as he walks us back to our cart. 

I cannot help the smile that comes to my face. “Yes I am. My wife and I just found out.” 

“You are blessed then. To finally have a wife and child. You must bring them here when you return so we may all meet them my pale brother.” 

I smirk at his nickname for me. He’s the only one who calls me that. “I will, so long as you promise to grant my child a better Cherokee name than mine.” 

“What is wrong with invigati saquu?” 

I raise an eyebrow at him. “Tall one isn’t exactly original.” 

Black Wolf laughs as he grasps my forearm. “Take care invigati saquu. Only time will show what name your child comes to earn.” 

With one last goodbye to my friend we depart from the Cherokee and begin our travels northwards to shadow lake.


	24. Chapter 24

QUINLEE

When we arrive at Riverrun Ulysses comes out to greet us. “Mistress Northman! What a pleasant surprise. We did not expect to be seeing you so soon.” 

He holds out a hand and helps me down from the cart. “Thank you. I apologize for not sending word of our arrival but we were short on time. Much has happened in the past week.” 

“I see...and who might your traveling companions be?” He inquires politely. 

“Forgive me, this is my sister Brianna. The one I told you about before. And our - well our great godfather I suppose. Murtagh Fitzgibens.” I introduced them both. Murtagh tips his hat towards Ulysses who appraises the Scotsman suspiciously before escorting us all inside to the parlor. 

“Mistress Cameron some new guests just arrived. Mistress Northman has returned along with your other great niece mistress Fraser and...friends.” Ulysses announces us to my auntie who is sitting by the fire knitting a scarf. 

She puts the scarf into Phaedra’s hands before standing up. A concerned expression on her face as she takes a couple of steps towards us. “Quinlee my dear sweet girl! Whatever are you doing back so soon? Is something the matter?” She holds out her hands for me to take. 

I walk up and put my hands in hers. Feeling the tension in my shoulders I have been carrying the past several days of travel begin to slowly relax in her familiar embrace. “Yes, something awful has happened but not with Erik or I. It is my sister Brianna we um - we…” I trail off uncertain how much Brianna wants me to say. 

“There is a letter from your nephew mistress if that would help.” Ulysses offers kindly to read the words Jamie had written to our auntie. “Well go on then, read it please.” Jocasta insists. 

He opens it and begins to clear his throat before Brianna interrupts him. “It says I am with child and unmarried. It asks that you look after me, despite the mark it might bring on your good name, while our parents search for the man to which I have been handfast. Who may or may not be dead…” 

Ulysses slowly begins folding the letter back up. “That is about the extent of it mistress.” 

Auntie has a contemplative look about her before she smiles warmly. “Come closer lass.” She reaches out one of her hands for Brianna. My twin hesitates at first before placing her hand in Jocasta’s. “Of course you may stay with us. Another dear girl.” 

Brianna looks as if she is about ready to cry. I rub at her back lightly. The floorboards creak behind us. “Who else is with you?” Auntie questions, eyes darting around behind us. 

“Murtagh Fitzgibens Fraser.” Murtagh introduces himself. 

“Murtagh? Is it truly you? Blessed bride!” Auntie exclaims joyously. 

“Aye it is.” He says as he comes forward. Brianna and I step aside so he may greet Jocasta properly. She grabs a hold of his large weathered hands. “Oh aye, I’d know those hands anywhere. They told ye, no doubt, that my eyes have long failed me.” 

“Mm, aye. You must have taken special note of my hands to recall them after thirty years have passed.” Murtagh teases her. 

She laughs at him. “How could I not? Ye could hardly keep them from my sister everyday of her young life. Every time I looked at her there ye were wi’ a hand held out to help her, or wi’ flowers in them for her.”

Murtagh lets out a sorrowful sigh. “Little good it did me in the end.” 

“You gained a god son as I recall. And now it seems two daughters to look after as well.” 

“Aye, that I did.” 

After we are settled in I find auntie Jocasta on the front porch. She beckons me towards her. I take a seat in the chair next to her. The cool spring air blows around us gently. I tuck a few errant auburn whisps behind my ear. She turns towards me with an almost knowing smile. “Is something on your mind dearie?” 

I smooth out my dress and clear my throat. “Mmmh-hmmm, nothing is the matter exactly it’s just...I’ve got some news.” 

“Happy news then?” 

I cannot help but smile. “Yes, very happy actually. I - I’m pregnant.” 

Jocasta’s entire face lights up. “Oh I knew it! A wee bairn, what a blessing. Congratulations are in order then!” 

“Thank you auntie.” 

She reaches out for my hand and takes it in hers. “The moment we met I knew there was something special about you. You softened the heart of that hardheaded Norseman for one. Now look at you, wed with a bairn on the way...I could not be happier for you lass.” 

Murtagh leaves the next morning back to Wilmington. Says he has business there but won’t tell us what it is. Our days fall into an easy pattern after that. Brianna and I take quiet morning walks along the river. That somber anger of hers never seems to dissipate no matter how hard I try to engage with her all I can get are a few words in response. Usually in the afternoons she goes back upstairs to her room to draw while I join auntie in her offices and help with the bookkeeping or read the latest novel to her or play for her on the piano. It helps distract me at the very least from missing everyone...and distracts me from thinking too hard about what happened to Brianna. Every time I think about what that monster did to her I clutch at my stomach. To think it could be him and not Roger who is the father of her child. She may never truly know one way or the other. And to make matters worse, the massive fight her and Jamie got into that awful morning; I know my twin well and she is more than capable of holding onto a grudge for a very - very long time. 

Auntie told me last week we are to be hosting a dinner soon with some of her close acquaintances. She has on that knowing smirk when she tells me Phaedra will fit both Brianna and I for a new dress. Our auntie is definitely up to something. Brianna flatly refuses the dress when Phaedra comes to take our measurements. Considering we’re both growing by the day she’s going to have to leave extra room around the middle. I concede to having a new dress made. There is very little point in trying to argue with Jocasta when she has her mind set on something. I learned that the first time I was here. 

One afternoon as Brianna and I are sitting on a settee reading a book Aunt Jocasta comes to join us. She even dismisses Ulysses when she is settled down next to us. “I have a little something for the both of you.” Auntie pulls out to velvet boxes from her pockets. “The green one is for you Brianna and the blue one is for Quinlee. To wear at our upcoming dinner of course. They should look lovely with your dresses.” 

We both take the boxes hesitantly. When I open mine I see a beautiful necklace with a tear drop shaped ruby hanging from it with matching ruby earrings. “Thank you auntie, this is...very kind of you. We promise to take good care of the jewelry while we borrow them.” I tell her politely. Jocasta chuckles at me. “My dear girl they aren’t for you to borrow! They’re for ye to have as yer own! What on earth am I to do with such fine jewels anyways? Lord above knows I’ve got plenty more to choose from.” 

I glance over and notice Brianna staring at her earrings with a look of exasperation. “Thank you auntie, but I already told Phaedre I don’t need a new dress.” 

Jocasta turns further towards Brianna’s voice. “Aye, she mentioned that. Which is why I’m having her alter one of mine to fit ye instead. Those earrings went with the dress if I do recall.” Our auntie certainly doesn’t take no for an answer. I tried to warn Brianna that refusing the dress wouldn’t get her out of the evening but she is far more stubborn than I am. 

“That’s very generous of you.” Brianna manages to get out.

“You really should try it on. She’ll need to take some measurements of course. We want ye to look yer best for the dinner my dear. Not everyday a Lord graces these halls. I ken your consumed with worry, and biding yer time here with naught to do about it...it’s distressing at the very least. There is comfort to be found in the company of others. Will you not enjoy some food, some lively conversation?” Jocasta presses her argument. 

Brianna glances down at the jewelry box in her hand. “Thank you, but I’m honestly happier being on my own...reading, drawing.” 

“Hmm, I used to paint ye ken? I was never as talented as yer grandmother, Ellen.” Jocasta suddenly admits the personal detail. I’m a little surprised by it. Auntie isn’t much of one to share her past experiences. 

“We don’t know much about her.” I comment, referring to our late grandmother. All anyone ever told us was that Ellen was kind with a strong will and equally strong wit. 

“She was an artist?” Bri asks intrigued. 

Jocasta nods at us. “Aye, she was. The two of ye are very much like her. In different ways of course but all the same...very much like Ellen. Ye both have her spirit.”

“Hmm, we do?” Brianna asks again, a little disbelieving. 

Auntie nods again. “She was our father’s favorite. She remained unwed well past the time a young woman ought to be settled with a husband but...he wouldna force her into a marriage she herself would not accept.” 

I stare at Jocasta surprised by the out of place behavior. “How very modern of him.” 

Auntie smiles as if recalling a fond memory. “She was headstrong. Followed her heart. And after father died she wed the man she truly loved, Brian Fraser. Our father would have been happy for her.” 

For the first time in weeks I see Brianna crack a tiny smile. “You’re right. Conversation is good for a worried mind.” 

Jocasta looks in her direction with a triumphant expression. “Aye, and there’s plenty more to be had. Phaedre is waiting for ye in yer chamber with the dress.” 

Brianna frowns slightly but reluctantly agrees to have the dress fitted and heads upstairs. As soon as she is out of earshot I raise an eyebrow at Jocasta. “You certainly have a way at convincing people to do as you wish.” 

She chuckles lightly at me while patting the back of my hand. “It comes with years of practice dearie.” 

The anticipated evening arrives. Phaedre helps us into our dresses. Brianna’s corset is pulled tighter than mine to hide her “condition” as Jocasta continually refers to her pregnancy as. She is put into a dark forest green dress while I get put into a ruby red dress with lace trimming. We both decide to loop our pearls around our wrists for the evening. Bri stares at the engagement bracelet Roger gave her before putting it on as well. I place a hand on her shoulder as she assesses her appearance in the mirror. “You look lovely tonight Bri.” 

She gives me a small trembling smile. “Thanks Quin, so do you.” 

We descend the staircase together. It is nice having someone else with me this time versus the last time when I was on my own. There are far fewer people at this intimate party tonight than there was when auntie presented me to the society of Riverrun when I was here before. Ulysses whispers into Jocasta’s ear as we reach the bottom of the stairs. “May I present to you all my nieces. Brianna Fraser and of course I believe most of you have met my other niece Quinlee Northman.” 

Auntie introduces Brianna to Mr. Gerald Forbes and his sister Prudence. The weasly looking lawyer rushes up to take Brianna’s hand in his placing a kiss upon the back of it. His eyes rove over my beautiful twin in a leering manner. “I’ve been looking forward to this occasion. Have you been enjoying your time here at Riverrun?” 

Brianna smiles politely at him. I think I’m the only one who can tell how uncomfortable she is having the spotlight on her. “Yes, my aunt has been a most generous hostess.” 

“How do you spend your days here?” Mr. Forbes inquires.

“Drawing mostly.” 

“The lass is quite accomplished.” Jocasta chimes in.

“Splendid! What sort of things do you draw?” The lawyer asks.

“I recently finished a portrait of Phaedre.” 

The sister Prudence finally speaks up. “Oh, I presume you mean the Phaedre of greek mythology, wife of Theseus.” 

I can tell Brianna is about to correct her when Jocasta interjects. “Yes, a good strong greek name.” 

Judge Alderdyce looks a little confused. “Isn’t Phaedre one of the slaves here at Riverrun?” 

His mother, mistress Alderdyce, looks aghast. “You mean to say you draw negros?” 

“Brianna I - I don’t believe you’ve had the pleasure of meeting mistress Alderdyce and her son the honorable Judge Alderdyce.” Jocasta introduces them. 

Brianna gives them a deep curtsy before answering. “I draw whatever inspires me.” 

The honorable judges looks impressed by Brianna. “Very courageous, I’d love to see it.” 

“I could have Ulysses fetch it for you if you like?” Brianna offers. 

Mistress Alderdyce gasps in shock and disquiet. “Oh heavens no. What is the world coming to? To think you’d choose that as your subject in a beautiful place such as this.” 

Jocasta chuckles lightly. “Oh, young folk today, my goodness whatever shall we do with them? I’m sure Lieutenant Wolff will have some thoughts to share. Where are ye, dear friend?”

The Lieutenant shoves his way through the small crowd, practically knocking Mr. Forbes out of the way in the process. I have to admit watching the two pompous men jockeying over one another is entertaining at the very least. Although my poor twin certainly doesn’t need or want their attentions. The Lieutenant stares up at Brianna with a flirtatious smile. “I have new found empathy for your great-aunt’s lack of sight.” 

Brianna seems rather taken aback by the brazen comment. She smiles politely anyways. “You’re too kind.” 

“With your aunt’s permission, I’d like to take you on an excursion to New Bern to show you some of the uh - the magnificent sights.” The Lieutenant offers as his eyes move up and down Brianna’s frame. Her hand digs into mine; I’m sure she’s horrified at the notion of spending alone time with the man. 

I clear my throat to garner his attention. “Hmm-mmh, I believe it may be inappropriate for my dear sister to be unchaperoned on such an excursion.” 

“Oh, but of course. I would of course invite you as chaperone mistress Northman.” He offers but he doesn’t seem pleased by the idea of not having time alone with my sister. 

Mr. Forbes interrupts. “Uh - Miss Fraser, there is something I wish to show you. Perhaps you would be so good as to accompany me?” 

Brianna laughs weakly, obviously unsure what to do. “Perhaps we could all join you in the parlor.” I offer as an alternative instead. My twin squeezes my hand in appreciation. 

Our small troop makes its way into the parlor. The lawyer opens up a small chest containing several gemstones. He addresses Brianna. “I am thinking of having one of these stones fashioned into a piece of jewelry, a gift. Tell me, my dear, which one pleases you most? The sapphire, the emerald, the topaz, or the diamond? With your instinct for loveliness you would have a most valuable opinion, should you be willing to oblige me with it?” 

Brianna stares at him dumbstruck for a few moments. “I um - shouldn’t like to venture my own opinion without first hearing mistress Adlerdyce’s choice.” 

The mistress looks mighty pleased by Brianna’s announcement and starts moving towards the chest. Suddenly Ulysses clears his throat. The room turns to the sound and sees a handsomely dressed young man standing next to Ulysses. “May I present Lord John Grey.” 

The Lord gives a small bow to the room. “Greetings one and all.” He turns his attention to Jocasta. “Mistress Cameron, very glad to be here. I’m sure a splendid evening awaits us.” 

She smiles warmly at him. “Ye’re most welcome here my Lord. Please allow me to introduce my nieces. Miss Brianna Fraser and the newlywed Mistress Quinlee Northman.” 

We all move into the dining room for the evening meal where Lord Grey regales us of the fascinating escapades he experienced while Governor of Jamaica. “-and the woman claimed to tell fortunes by holding a personal item. It was rather amusing I must admit, although not the strangest thing that happened during my time in Jamaica. A very strange place indeed though that’s a story for another glass.”

The room laughs at his fascinating stories and generally charming nature. He turns to the two of us. “Alright, I’ve certainly embarrassed myself enough for one evening. It’s one of your turns.” He passes the torch off to us. 

“I uh, I am afraid we don’t have any anecdotes half as entertaining as yours Lord John. And certainly neither of us are fortune tellers.” I reply in a jesting manner, which at least earns a chuckle from the Lord.

“We actually do have something for occasions such as these.” Brianna interjects. I raise my eyebrow at her skeptically. She gives me a smirk before continuing. “It’s something we learned a long time ago in Boston on the subject of psychology. The science of the soul if you will.” 

I stare at her wide eyed for a moment. Is she really going to quote Professor Morrison? Good lord I despised that class. One of the few courses we took together before she transferred to MIT. I wonder which of the professor's party tricks she’s going to use.

“Well it sounds intriguing.” Auntie remarks with only a small air of suspicion. 

“Yet it only works with strangers. I’ll ask you all a few questions, and I want you to picture whatever comes to mind first.” Brianna instructs the room. Oh god we’re going with this pseudoscience trick. “You may want to close your eyes.” I chime in. 

Mr. Forbes turns to look at Brianna. “Must I close my eyes when such loveliness is before me?” 

My twin stares at him uncomfortably. “Yes, I insist.” 

The man reluctantly closes his eyes along with everyone else. “I want you to imagine you are in the forest with someone. Can you picture the person?” 

Everyone around the tables murmurs some variation of yes. “You encounter an animal.” I tell the room. “Should we tell you what it is?” Lieutenant Wolff asks. “No, not yet. I want you to imagine that you reach a clearing.” 

After a few moments Brianna tells everyone they may open their eyes. “Now one at a time, you’ll tell us what you saw and we’ll tell you what each answer represents.” 

“Symbolically speaking.” I chime in. The room lets out a laugh and Miss Forbes remarks what fun.

Mr. Forbes puffs out his chest and makes like he wants to be asked first. His gaze still locked on Brianna. I turn towards the judge instead. “Judge Alderdyce, are you happy to go first? Who was with you in the forest?”

The Judge looks a little flummoxed. “I...was walking with Christ.”

“And the animal you saw?” Brianna asks him.

“A squirrel, one very particular fellow in fact. Frequents my mother’s garden each morning.” The Judge tells us with an amused chuckle. 

“Hmm, well you see when a person is walking with Christ it can mean they are seeking forgiveness or reassurance for something.” I explain.

Judge Alderdyce scoffs. “Given my occupation it’s no surprise that the notion of forgiveness is often on my mind.” 

“Yes, but when walking with Christ yourself, coupled with the squirrel you saw in your mother’s garden...You see the animal you encounter represents life’s problems. Given squirrels tend to hoard things away it would seem that your problems are secrets.” Brianna continues the interpretation. Professor Morrison would be proud. 

Miss Forbes holds up her finger with a look of realization on her face. “Something Mrs. Alderdyce doesn’t know about then, since the squirrel was in her garden!” 

Mistress Alderdyce looks affronted at the mere notion of it. “I assure you I know everything there is to know about my son.” 

I incline my head towards the older woman. “Of course you do.” She seems appeased by that.

The Judge suddenly stands up, looking slightly embarrassed. “If you’ll excuse me for a moment I must take some air.” He scurries out of the room towards the front porch.

Mr. Forbes certainly appears entertained. “Well, well, well, maybe there is something to this after all?” 

Auntie laughs. “Very entertaining. My nieces are clever lasses indeed.” 

Brianna turns to Lord John. “So, dare I ask who was with you in the forest?” 

He looks a touch taken aback by her abrupt request. “O-oh, uh, it was umm...your father.” 

“Oh, why did you think of him?” I ask the Lord.

He shifts in his chair before answering. “Well...you are his daughters and are sitting right in front of me and - and he did ask me to look in on the two of you.”

Brianna’s eyebrows crinkle together in concern. “Oh? And why would you need to do that?”

“He merely wrote to ask that I visit to ensure all is well. He mentioned he was about to embark on a long journey.” 

Brianna looks down at her plate for a moment, hurt and anger obvious by the glare in her eye and the clench of her jaw. “And he gave no reason at all as to why all might not be well?” 

Lord John glances between the two of us confused. “No...but from your response I’m beginning to suspect it might not be. Your father would never divulge anything that you yourself would not wish to tell me. He is an honorable man.” 

Brianna’s tearful eyes sear into Lord John’s. “Don’t you talk to me about my father’s honor.” 

When Mr. Forbes tries to insist that Brianna asks about his companion in the forest she pretends to become faint. It takes everything in my willpower not to roll my eyes at her. Miraculously everyone seems to believe her antics. Lord John escorts her into the parlor. Auntie gestures for me to join her and help her into the parlor as well. 

Just as we are entering the parlor we see John handing Brianna a note. A letter from our father apparently. “It seems you are feeling better.” Auntie comments curtly. 

Lord John Grey excuses himself, saying goodnight to us all and thanking Jocasta profusely for the wonderful dinner. I turn to Ulysses. “Would you mind excusing us for a moment Ulysses? I think we need a word with our auntie in private.” 

I guide Jocasta to the couch and we take a seat next to Bri. “May I speak frankly?” My twin asks sternly. 

Auntie lets out something between a snort and a chuckle. “Of course. You’ve been doing so all evening.” 

“I couldn’t help but notice that most of your guests tonight were unmarried men.” Bri remarks.

Auntie chuckles again. “Lord John was married but his wife passed.” 

Bri stares at her incredulously. “And the rest? You just pulled them out of a hat?” 

Auntie lets out an amused laugh. “Goodness, what a strange expression...they’re my friends, gentlemen I’ve been acquainted with for many years. Any one of whom make an acceptable suitor. If we are speaking frankly niece, it is time we found you a husband.” 

Brianna looks at her horrified. “What if I don’t want a husband?” 

Jocasta scoffs at her. “What does want have to do with anything?”

“Everything!” Brianna yells, nostrils flaring. 

“Everything? Ye’ve a bairn coming! Yer time to be particular has long past. Ye’ve nothing, not a penny to yer name. A name at risk of being tarnished. You have to think of yer future, yer security. A marriage to one of these men would be of great benefit to you.” Auntie instructs her although it comes off as more of a demand. It reminds me eerily of when I was first in Riverrun and she told me of the proposals I had garnered during her last dinner party. 

“To you as well no doubt?” Brianna questions accusingly. 

Auntie looks mildly irritated. “The union of two families is always a blessing.” 

“What about love? You said my grandmother married for love.” Brianna bites back. 

Jocasta lets out a heavy sigh. “Aye, she did. Like ye, Ellen was with child before she wed. Our brothers tried to arrange a marriage for her, but she outwitted them and eloped with Brian Fraser instead. However, the important thing is the child was born in wedlock! If yours is not he’ll be branded a fatherless bastard. His life will be ruined.” 

Brianna stares down at her hands. I can see the fear in her eyes. Not just fear for Roger, fear for her child’s future as well. We are not in the 1970’s anymore. Being a single unwed mother isn’t an option in these times. Jocasta places her hand on top of Brianna’s and presses on. “I ken ye once had a man ye loved, but he’s gone. It’s not what ye want to hear, but he’s not coming back. He’s with the savages now, be it dead or alive. The sooner ye accept that the better. Ye canna live on hope.” 

Brianna looks devastated, tears forming at the corners of her eyes. I wrap my arms around her shoulders and pull her towards me. “Something to...to think over auntie. I think it’s time Brianna and I retired. It’s been a long wearing day.” 

She gives us a sad smile. “Of course lass. Ye both need plenty of rest. We’ll talk more on the matter in the morning.” 

When we go upstairs I head with Brianna into her room. “That woman! She just won’t take no for an answer!” She hisses as soon as the door closes. 

“Brianna we need to come up with another plan. I am sure Jamie will find Roger. I know he will. We just have to stave off any sort of potential engagement until he returns.” I explain. Knowing Jocasta she is inevitably receiving offers from at least one of the suitors tonight or will tomorrow morning. We need to come up with an alternative that auntie will accept. This isn’t a time where young women can simply remain unwed, especially pregnant young women. 

She paces the room in a contemplative manner. Then like a bolt of lightning an idea appears to her. The gears in that brilliant mind of hers spinning away. “What about Lord John? He is a good friend of Jamie’s, maybe he would agree to - to a false arrangement?”

I tilt my head back and forth. “It’s a possibility...” 

We both sit on the settee and stare at the fire for several more minutes trying to think of any other plan that might allow her to evade auntie’s insistence that she be wed before Roger returns. Nothing else comes to mind. I let out a large yawn. It’s only been this past week that I’ve noticed the smallest of bumps beginning to form on my stomach. I have a new appreciation for mama and what she went through with us. Being pregnant seems to knock all energy right out of me. I head off to my room, stopping to grab a sugar cookie before going to bed. As I munch on the sweet slowly letting my mind wander to thoughts of Erik and my parents an odd thumping noise starts up down the hall. Curious, I hesitantly walk towards the noise to investigate, just barely peeking my head around the corner I have to cover my mouth to stop the startled gasp from giving me away. Lord John is having...intimate relations with Judge Alderdyce. Backing away as quietly as I can I go back to Brianna’s room. If Lord John is gay then even if, god forbid, Roger doesn’t come back it truly could just be a marriage of convenience. One in name only. 

The next morning Brianna comes rushing into my room waking me up in the process. “Phaedre just came by. Mr. Forbes is going to propose. I bought us an hour. Can you ask Lord John to meet me by the large oak tree as soon as possible? And please - please distract auntie for as long as you can.” 

I nod at her as I rush to put on the first dress I can find. “Of course. Go back to your room and start getting ready. I’ll run and find John...discreetly. I can maybe distract auntie and Mr. Forbes for an extra twenty or thirty minutes. Anything past that and they’ll get suspicious. This is going to work. I can feel it.” I tell my twin confidently. She doesn’t seem particularly reassured. 

As I head down into the dining room for breakfast I see that Mr. Forbes is already up with auntie. He’s holding a rather large velvet box while pacing back and forth. A triumphant smile on his entitled face. “Mistress Northman, pleasure to see you this fine morning. Please tell us, where might your illustrious sister be today?” 

I smile at him politely. “I am afraid she already left for a morning walk. She might be a little late as she has much on her mind. It was a rather exciting evening last night.” 

Just over an hour later Brianna comes into the dining room looking something between terrified and bewildered. I crinkle my eyebrows together when we make eye contact. We seem to be able to read each other’s minds in that moment as she ever so discreetly shakes her head from side to side no. It didn’t work...how did it not work? I feel panic beginning to rise, my brain grasping at straws trying to find a way to stave off the inevitable proposal she is about to receive from Mr. Forbes. 

Then low and behold Lord John comes sailing around the corner. “Thank you for waiting for me, my dear, have you told them our good news?” 

Brianna’s eyes go wide with surprise as she stares up at him. “No, I haven’t.” 

“I’ve asked for Miss Fraser’s hand in marriage and she has accepted.” He announces. 

I feel myself letting out a breath I didn’t even realize I was holding in. “A joyous occasion then!” 

“Yes it is. I must thank you auntie, for if you had not encouraged me to find a husband I never would have opened my heart to Lord John.” Brianna declares smugly. 

“Uh...good day to you all.” Mr. Forbes says in a flustered angry manner before storming out of the room. He gives Brianna one last furious gaze then practically flies out the front door.

Jocasta is smiling with that scheming grin of hers. “Come here my dear! I dinna ken how ye managed it, a Mackenzie ye truly are. What wonderful news!”


	25. Chapter 25

ERIK

The journey to shadow lake is long and arduous with it’s fair share of dangers, mostly from the wilderness, bears and wolves and the like. There aren’t too many others trekking through the backwoods into Mohawk territory besides the occasional tracker. We spend several nights at various Mohawk villages along the way. A few of the men we met I had seen before with Black Wolf when they came through Cherokee territory to trade in the past. They are relatively hospitable. Allow us to make camp within the confines of their lands. Provide us with directions for the quickest route to shadow lake.

It takes us close to four months to reach the village. They are suspicious of us at first. In my broken Mohawk I am able to explain that we are here to trade for a white man that was sold to them by mistake. We show them the photo of Roger. After several moments of murmuring amongst themselves one of the children seems to recognize the drawing Brianna drew and refers to him as “dogface”; charming nickname. They allow us to come further into the village to speak with their chief and elders about a fair trade. Just as we think they may be interested in striking a deal Claire takes off her scarf and all of the Mohawk next to her back away in fear, staring at her necklace. The one with the strange blue green stone. “It’s just a scarf. I was just showing her my scarf!” Claire exclaims confused by their reaction. 

“It’s not your scarf…” I mutter. She seems to realize it’s her necklace that has caused such an inflammatory response. We try to see if they will trade Roger for the necklace instead but the chief seems almost offended by the notion. He banishes us from the village. Calls the necklace a curse on the Mohawk. We slowly back away and leave the village. Shit, shit, shit. 

“How are we supposed to get him back now uncle?” Ian ponders aloud.

Jamie looks contemplative before glancing over at me. “Erik and I, we can sneak into the village tonight. Get him out.” 

I run my hand over the side of my face. “We’ll probably get caught but I don’t see we have many other options at this point.” 

Suddenly we are ambushed by a small band of Mohawk. I manage to grab the one that comes at me and wrestle him to the ground. Ripping the tomahawk out of his hand and putting it to his throat. A Mohawk woman stares us down with a stern expression. “We’re here for the stone. Give it to us and we will not harm you.” 

Claire holds up her hands in a placating manner. “We’ll consider giving it to you...if you help us get our friend back.” 

The woman tilts her chin up. “Very bold of you considering we could take the stone by force.” 

Jamie has a blade to another man’s throat and glances over at me. “Not all of ye will be walking away whole.” 

The woman shrugs. “We could come back later if you like. Try again.” 

Claire takes a step towards her. “Please, what is your name?” 

“Wahkatiiosta.” 

Claire takes another few steps forward. “Wahkatiiosta...tell me, why is this stone so important?” 

“Many years ago, before I was born, a man came to us. He would not tell us from whence he came. He spoke instead of from ‘when’ he came. His name was Tawineonawira - otter tooth. He talked of war, warning us of our future. How we must lift our tomahawks. ‘Kill the white man or the white man will kill you.’ He said. One day, he painted himself. Danced a war dance. Many followed him and they returned with white scalps. The village was angry, afraid his actions would bring soldiers seeking revenge. My grandfather, the chief at the time, said that otter tooth must leave for he would bring destruction. Otter tooth hid in the forest, he ranted and raved. They began to believe he was possessed by an evil spirit. He would come back again and again. Banishing him would no longer be enough. They painted his face black for death but in the morning he was gone. The men chased him for days. Finally they caught him. Even after one of the men struck him he talked through the blood, spitting out words of warning. When he lay dead his words went on ringing in the warriors ears. ‘You will be forgotten. The Nations of the Iroquois will be no more. No one will tell your stories. Everything you are will be lost.’ The men turned towards home but his voice followed them. They cut off his head, but still his voice was heard. Tehwahsewke, our chief, was a young warrior who took the head and buried it far far away.” 

“His skull was with the stone.” Claire tells her. 

Wahkatiiosta eyes her skeptically. “How do you know that? It is said that the one who possesses the stone has the power to see how my people’s story will end and Otter Tooth’s ghost walks with whoever carries it. Has he come to you?” 

Claire nods her head in a trembling manner. “Yes. I was lost in a storm and took cover under a fallen tree. That is when he came to me. I believe that ghosts only exist when there is something to be remembered. A story worth telling, or a message worth relaying.” 

“Do you believe this Otter Tooth to be right?” Jamie asks. 

Wahkatiiosta looks over at him. “Yes. I believe he came to warn my people and the stone will enable us to see what is coming.” 

Claire grabs onto the stone and holds it up. “If you help us rescue the man we came to take back then we will help you preserve the memory of the man who fought for your future. Help us and the stone will be yours.”


	26. Chapter 26

QUINLEE

Every morning I sit on the porch with Bri waiting for our family to return. We both grow and grow by the day. I’m not quite used to being this size. It seems as though no matter what I do or how I position myself I am always uncomfortable. I am sure Bri has even more discomfort given she is at least a month ahead of me. Lord John has been exceptionally kind to both of us. He brought us a letter written by Jamie, an apology for what he said to Bri and him asking her to choose forgiveness over revenge. When Lord John tells us they have captured Bonnet and he is scheduled to be hanged by the end of the week Brianna insists that she wants to see her attacker. That she wants to see Bonnet before his execution. What on earth she could have to say to the man I have no idea, but if she is truly of a mind to go through with this then she won’t be going alone. 

Lord John offers to escort us to Wilmington given that he is Brianna’s “fiance” so we embark back on the Sally Anne once again. As we traverse down the river I join Brianna at the back of the boat the day before we are to enter port. She is silent and contemplative as she stares off into the distance. 

I lean against the boat next to her. “I can’t imagine what you might be thinking right now…”

Her eyes flicker towards me for only a moment before returning to the waters churning below. “I’m just thinking about - about what I might say to him. What I should say to Bonnet.” 

I follow her gaze out over the water. “After what he has done there is nothing you could say that would be wrong. Say whatever is in your heart, whatever you wish to say, good or bad.” 

Her eyes remained glued to the horizon as she seems to be contemplating my words. I pat her shoulder before going back inside the small vessel. The next day we are back in Wilmington. As Lord John assists us both out of the carriage I find my hand fluttering towards my stomach, rubbing it lightly. A habit I picked up these past few weeks whenever I got anxious. It feels as if I get larger everyday. 

Brianna lets out a pained exhale. Lord John looks at her with concern. “Are you alright?” 

She grits her teeth and nods. “Yeah, it’s just awkward is all. I thought I’d get used to being this size but I haven’t. I just become more and more uncomfortable.” 

“Tell me about it.” I grumble in appreciation.

Brianna seems to be in a daze as she glances around the streets of Wilmington. “Being here is harder than I thought it would be.” 

She grips onto my offered hand tightly. “Memories will come as they come Bri, but they are only memories. Ghosts of our past. They cannot hurt you anymore.” I tell her.

“I miss mama.” She admits fretfully.

“I daresay I find myself missing her at times as well, particularly when I am ill. In spite of her unwaveringly direct manner she is a rather remarkable woman.” Lord John tells us with a smirk and a gleam to his eye.

“Hopefully she returns before the babies arrive.” Brianna replies thoughtfully while glancing down at her growing stomach.

“Knowing your parents, they will do everything in their power to return Roger to you Brianna.” Lord John proclaims. He offers his arms for both of us to take. 

Brianna gives her ‘fiance’ a large grin. “You are impossible not to like.” 

Lord John is able to use his credentials to get us into the jailhouse. The guards do not pay the presence of two ladies much heed when we are with a nobleman. They tell us they’ve moved Bonnet to a cell where he is chained to the wall in preparation of our visit. Lord John asks Brianna if she is certain she wants to do this one more time and she nods firmly. 

As we walk into the jail and are only a few doors away from Bonnet’s cell Bri spins so she is facing both of us. “I will see him alone.” 

“No. Bri you -” She cuts me off with just a look. “He is in chains, he cannot hurt me anymore.” 

“If anything were to happen…” John trails off fretfully. 

“Nothing is going to happen.” She states firmly. That strong fire blazing back in her eyes for the first time in weeks. 

“We’ll be right here then, if you need us.” I reassure my twin. 

John and I both wait anxiously. Staring at the entrance to Bonnett’s cell I pray that Brianna finds the solace and closure she seeks. The seconds tick by and feel like hours. Suddenly a group of men come bursting into the jail cell armed to the teeth. Lord John grabs a hold of my arm and pulls me behind him. “Stand down! Halt! Halt!” One of the guards yells at them but they smash the butt of their gun into his forehead and he falls to the ground. They cock the gun at the fallen guardsman. “Unhand him at once!” Lord John demands. 

A young man pulls the cloth down from around his face. “Lord John?” He questions in a manner that suggests they’ve met before.

“Fergus? What is the purpose of this attack?” John asks in confusion. Is this truly the Fergus that mama and Jamie told us so much about? He seems older than I imagined. 

“We’re here to free a friend.” Fergus tells him before turning to one of his comrades. “I have the keys. Do not harm him, but do not allow him to leave. His allegiance is to governor Tryon.” He turns back to us once more. “I am very sorry.” 

Then Fergus and several of his comrades go scurrying off down the hall. I hear him yelling for Murtagh. What on earth is Murtagh doing in a jail? Bri comes rushing out of the cell given all of the commotion. “What is going on?” She insists. 

“It’s Fergus, he came to free Murtagh.” I tell her before grabbing onto her hand and following after the frenchman. They are opening the cell door as we round the corner. Fergus stares at the two of us confused as to what we are doing, but then Murtagh comes out and gives Bri and I a double take. 

“Lasses? What on earth are ye doing here?” Our great-godfather asks perplexed. 

“There was someone I needed to see.” Brianna answers. 

“We must hurry.” Fergus insists. He seems to gather that we all know each other at least. 

We head back to Bonnet’s cell to collect Lord John and the rest of their comrades. John glares at Murtagh. “Mr. Fitzgibbon’s, well I am not entirely surprised to see you here.”

Murtagh glares back at him with equal venom. “I suppose this is the devil that brought ye here to see the villain?” 

“He’s not to blame. I insisted.” Brianna proclaims. Murtagh and John continue to stare each other down. 

“Ye lasses will be coming with me. I’ll deliver ye back to Riverrun.” Murtagh almost growls.

John scoffs at him. “You? Whilst every militiaman and redcoat in Wilmington hunts you down? I will escort Ms. Fraser and Mrs. Northman to Riverrun.” 

“Over my dead body.” Murtagh snarls at him.

John stares at him like he’s an idiot. “Which you will most assuredly be if you are caught! They will be under my protection.” 

“Under Tyron’s protection. If either of them are seen with you their necks will be in ropes.” Fergus interjects. 

Murtagh look as if he just ate something sour. “Aye, then I shall trust ye both to Lord John then.” 

“Be careful.” I tell our great-godfather imploringly, although I highly doubt he will heed me.

“Hurry lads, we haven’t much time. The powder’s been lit!” 

John looks bewildered. “You intend to blow up the jail?” 

“A diversion to cover our retreat. We haven’t a moment to waste!” Fergus tells us, ushering us all towards the exit.

“Wait what about him?” I ask pointing towards the passed out guard on the ground. “We can’t just leave him here to die.” Brianna insists. 

“Get him out here lads. Now.” Murtagh orders his friends. They swiftly comply and pick up the unconscious guardsman. 

We all run out of the jail and barely a minute later the place goes up in flames. Murtagh, Fergus, and the other men with them sprint down an alleyway while Lord John, Brianna, and I join the growing crowd of speculators. A british soldier comes rushing up to us. “Your Lordship! Are you and the ladies unharmed?” 

“Yes, we are all quite well.” John answers for us.

The soldier lets out a sigh of relief. “I’m glad to hear it. We’re uncertain how many perished in the blast. I am told you were visiting a prisoner in the jail prior to the explosion?” 

“Did you apprehend any of the insurgents?” Lord John asks. 

The soldier shakes his head. “No, they were more prepared than we could have anticipated. It appears these regulators were intent on releasing their leader, Murtagh Fitzgibbons. Did they mention where they were taking him?”

Lord John looks at us for a moment before returning his attention towards the soldier. “Unfortunately the event took place with such stunning rapidity. I heard nothing that would aid your search, though I trust you will find them.” 

The soldier nods his head vigorously. “We will my lord. Governor Tryon will not allow this to go unpunished.” 

The soldiers go rushing past us trying to find a lead on where Murtagh disappeared to. Brianna and I both look at each other in a conspiratorial manner. I notice my twin glance back at the jail that is still smoldering from the flames. A look of relief spreads across her face, relief that I am sure only comes by knowing Bonnet is dead.


	27. Chapter 27

ERIK

Leaving Ian behind to the Mohawk was harder than I would have imagined. I had not realized how much I had grown to care about the scrappy kid throughout our journey. What he did was an honorable deed. Exchanging himself for Roger after last night’s rescue attempt failed miserably. 

“How are you going to tell Jenny?” Claire asks James once we are away from the village back to our horses and supplies.

He lets out a forlorn sigh. “She knows her son. She won’t be happy but she will understand. She kens his restless nature and need for adventure.” 

Claire smiles at him. “Same as his uncle.” 

“Aye, always has been.” 

Suddenly Roger punches James in the jaw without warning. For a beaten man with one broken arm his upper cut isn’t half bad. “You fucking bastard!” Roger screams at him. 

“Roger stop it!” Claire yells at him.

James looks momentarily surprised but puts his arm up to tell his wife to back off. “No, no. No leave him be. This is between us.” He lets out a deep breath. “Go on. Suppose I owe you.” 

“Happy to oblige.” Roger grunts before laying into James again. At the end James has to practically hold the bloodied man up as he continues to punch weakly at him. Eventually his legs seem to give out and Roger falls to the ground breathing heavily. “Where is she?” 

“She’s safe. She’s with Jamie’s aunt in North Carolina.” Claire tells him. We all know the she Roger is referring to.

“She sent you for me then?” He asks almost in disbelief.

“Yes, of course she did.” Claire reassures him.

Roger lets out a broken sob, turning towards James. “When I met you on the ridge I thought that may be the reason you beat me...because she said terrible things and turned you against me.” 

James shakes his head. “No, no she didna she...that was my own notion. I didna ken who you were.”

Roger tilts his head back in relief. “Oh thank god. Having me beaten nearly to death and sold into slavery seemed a trifle extreme. Even for a woman with her temper.” 

“Why did you beat me then? I mean if you didn’t even know who I was...”

Claire finally interjects. “It was a terrible misunderstanding.” 

Roger scoffs at her disbelieving. “Claire! A misunderstanding!” 

“Roger...Brianna was attacked.” She tells him softly. 

“Attacked? What do you mean?” He asks confused. 

“She means after ye left my daughter she was raped.” Jamie spits at him accusingly. “That’s why I beat you. I mistook ye for the man that did it.”

“How could you think such a thing? I love her.” Roger proclaims with conviction before he starts sobbing again. “Raped...who? Who did this to her?” 

“A man named Stephen Bonnet.” Claire explains.

He stares at her in disbelief. “Bonnet? Brianna was raped by Stephen Bonnet!” He screams.

“You know the bastard?” I ask. 

“He - he was the captain of the ship I came over on.” Roger admits.

James takes a step towards him. “And where were ye when he attacked her huh? Ye coward!” He snarls at Roger.

“Jamie!” Claire yells at him.

“Bri was angry with ye, so ye - ye ran away. You left her alone!” James continues on his angry tirade until Roger punches him in the face again. James grabs onto the man’s shirt and points a finger accusingly. “That is the last unanswered blow!” 

“I didn’t leave because we argued! I left because she told me to go.” Roger admits through a cracked voice. “But even then I came back for her. But I was forced back onto the ship by...by bloody Stephen Bonnet.” He looks as if he’s about to say something else but stops himself when he glances over at me. “That’s why - why it took me so long to come to Fraser’s Ridge.” 

“Who on earth is the blonde giant?” Roger finally asks, gesturing towards me.

“I’m the one who helped track you down and negotiate for your release.” I say coldly. 

Claire lets out an exasperated sigh. “This is Erik, he’s Quinlee’s husband. A neighbor of ours up on the ridge.” 

Roger stares at me for a long moment. “Quinlee’s married? She married someone from…” He trails off not finishing his thought. 

“There’s something else we need to talk about Roger. Something Brianna wanted me to tell you. Roger she’s...she’s pregnant and she can’t go back home. To your home I mean. By the time we return to North Carolina she will have already given birth and won’t be able to - to travel with a child. She has to stay.” Claire says. There seems to be a double meaning behind her words that I cannot quite make out but Roger seems to understand them well enough.

“But he doesn’t.” James interjects bitterly.

Roger scoffs at him. “What you think I’d leave her? We’re handfast, she’s my wife. And now she’s carrying my child.”

Claire looks at him with eyes full of sorrow. “It may not be your child…”

His eyes are full of hurt and rage. “Bonnet. When did it happen?” He barely manages to whisper.

“Same night you left.” James hisses at him.

“Brianna wanted you to know so you would have a choice.” Claire clarifies. 

James takes another step towards him. “So I’m asking ye, can ye go back to her, live with her, knowing it might be Bonnet’s child she bears? Do ye mean to stand be her or not? Because if ye canna then say so now for I swear…” 

Claire puts a hand on her husband’s shoulder to get him to stop. “Jamie for God’s sake just give him a moment to think. I know this is a huge decision Roger, not one you should make lightly.” 

Roger shakes his head back and forth in pain. “This is all too much.” 

“You cost me a lad that I love and my daughter doesn’t need a coward. I’d rather she hate me for the rest of her life than for you to break her heart again. So make up your mind.” James says accusingly. 

“I need more time.” 

It looks as if James is about to say something but Claire clenches her hand on his shoulder. “Well if you need more time than you should take it. Because this is our daughter, so you better be sure.” She tells him with conviction.

We move further away from the village, as far as we can get with Roger’s injuries before making camp that night. Hardly anyone says another word to each other, all still lost in their own thoughts. I could not imagine what Roger is going through right now. As we are setting up camp for the night I can tell Claire wants to talk to Roger more. I nudge Jamie and grumble at him that we should collect more firewood. The scotsman reluctantly agrees to come along with me. 

As twilight falls over the forest James glances over at me for a moment, a contemplative expression on his slightly withered face. “Do you think he will leave?” 

I shrug at him. “I’m not sure. I do not know the man well enough to say one way or the other.” 

He is quiet for a moment before asking his next question. “Would you stay?” 

“Yes.” I reply without hesitation, without a second thought to the matter. 

“Do you truly love her so much already?” He asks. 

This time I pause, trying to find the right words. “Even if something that horrific happened to Quin...I could never leave her. Not when she would need me most. God just the thought of it - it feels like a knife to the chest.”

James gives me a small smirk. “Aye, figured you would say something akin to that.” 

“Why did you ask then if you already knew the answer?” I queerie.

That contemplative expression returns to the scotsman’s face. “I do not ken Roger, but I ken of where he’s from. He is not like us. The man comes from a - a different place.” 

I stare at him quizzically. “Is he not Scottish like yourself? Surely he cannot have been raised so differently.” 

“You would be surprised.” He replies cryptically. 

Changing the subject slightly, I decided to try asking him a different question. “Do you want Roger to stay?” 

That gives James pause. “Yes and no...I want my daughter wed. I will not have my grandchild be branded a bastard but at the same time I do not ken if Roger was meant to live this life. If he truly understands the challenges he would face...I cannot bear to see Bri heartbroken again.” 

“Hmm...so Roger did not grow up working the lands as you did in Scotland then?” 

James shakes his head at me. “No, he grew up quite different from what I understand. A man of intellect and collegiate pursuits.” 

I shrug my shoulders. “You know men from all kinds of backgrounds have come to this new world looking for a fresh start. Just because he does not know much about life in the back country doesn’t mean he cannot learn.” 

“Aye, I suppose you are right.” He grunts out before starting to make his way back to our encampment. 

The next morning it appears our conversation from last night was all for naught. Roger decided to leave and return home to Scotland apparently. James is fuming and barely says two words the first week on our long trek back to North Carolina. After all we’ve been through, after coming all this way and Roger wasn’t coming back with us. I can’t believe that Ian sacrificed himself to free a man who decided to run away in the end. I can’t believe that I am going to miss the birth of my first child over this.


End file.
